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Need help with pregnant wife ASAP!

Big Sky RedneckBig Sky Redneck Member Posts: 19,752 ✭✭✭
edited November 2002 in General Discussion
Ok, her due date is Monday and the doctor will prescribe medication to start contractions on Monday, doector is more impatient than I.

Anyhow Monday is the first day of Penn's. all out assault on those killer Bambis and if you think I'm gonna spen it at the docs office, well you better think again!

Aside from the suggestions that should not be posted here(we have been already trying those), whataya'll reccomend to get this show on the road now?

This needs to be done, it cannot wait till Monday. The woods are depending on me and my other two children to be there and save them from Bambisaurous.

HELP!!!!!!

Real men use little bullets.
redneck1314@pennswoods.net

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    wipalawipala Member Posts: 11,068
    edited November -1
    Slap a cork in it and go hunting

    Then said he unto them, But now, he that hath a purse, let him take it, and likewise his scrip: And he that hath no sword,let him sell his garment, and buy one
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    faldumfaldum Member Posts: 1,202 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Pop the "The Deer Hunter"
    into your VCR/DVD, break out a six pack
    and wait for your
    feelings to pass.
    And pay particularly close attention to
    Robert DeNiro's last shot.


    Edited by - faldum on 11/30/2002 16:57:37
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    drobsdrobs Member Posts: 22,553 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Come on get your priorities straight.


    Hunting then family.

    Regards,


    "Good Bad? I'm the guy with the gun." (Army of Darkness)
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    Big Sky RedneckBig Sky Redneck Member Posts: 19,752 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Faldum, I got a feeling I don't want to watch that movie. Those killer deer need to be stopped, they are destroying gardens and fenders on cheap imported cars, plus they taste great!

    Real men use little bullets.
    redneck1314@pennswoods.net
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    HAIRYHAIRY Member Posts: 23,606
    edited November -1
    Go on hunting; you did your job; she has to do hers now. Besides, there isn't much you can do. Be safe in the woods.

    It's not what you know that gets you in trouble, it's what you know that just ain't so!
    Resident Pyrrhonist
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    Bubba JoelBubba Joel Member Posts: 5,161
    edited November -1
    That's what you get for not going hunting nine months ago...

    Now, see what you've done..

    http://www.tmorg-forums.com/
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    elect1mikeelect1mike Member Posts: 4,585 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Put her in a 4 wheel drive find the ruffest trail and head
    up it at 40MPH after 20 minutes of this she will deliver if not
    before.


    col elect1mike Illinois
    volinters RRG
    O give me a home where no democrats roam
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    Judge DreadJudge Dread Member Posts: 2,372 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    DARN ! you shot that one out of your BBL and dont want to spend some time on your wife and the goin to be hunter-predator of the future..??????

    Shame on you ! screw! the bamby hunt and take care of your wife!

    I wonder if you do all in a hurry ,pee on the fly, crap on the loose chonka chonka monkey fast, and drop the kid like squeezing a bar of soap ......after 9 month time !!!!

    JD

    Donate to free energy R&D Just Paypall $$$ to:
    arkresearch@hotmail.com
    Intelligence is not measured in paper but in the ability of adaptation and analysis performance in multy-tasking problem solving work....
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    VarmintmistVarmintmist Member Posts: 1,074 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Stay home, DO NOT MENTION THIS POST TO THE WIFE, or you will be hearing about it for the rest of your life if you live that long.

    Go to the hospital, EVEN if she says go ahead and go hunting Dear.

    Those people who see nothing but grey areas, no black and white, are lost in the fog.
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    maboogermabooger Member Posts: 685 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    7MM Nut -- your not gonna like this but now you get the woman's advice !!! Speaking from experience ,,,,,,, that baby is gonna wait til it's darn good & ready :-). No bumpy roads, no "bouncing", no nothing is going to help. Believe me I tried.
    Smile sweetly & tell your wife that you will be by her side the entire labor -- even if it's the first day of Deer season. You can go hunting the 2nd day -- trust me if you are NOT there for the birth of your baby you might as well plan on living with, sleeping with & oh but yes being "intimate" with the deer you do get hunting.
    Put nicely I'd probably shoot YOU if it were me for even thinking about going hunting.
    Good luck & remember your life will be much more peaceful for being with your wife. Pregnant- post partum blues women are not forgiving women
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    dads-freeholddads-freehold Member Posts: 1,361 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    greetings, ok, first how much medical knowledge do you have, the reason i ask is your thinking like your wife is on a timer, not so a closer analogy ( but not perfectby any means) is the alarm clock with a snooze button. the thing you want to do is get her into snooze mode ( actually her metabolism), without harming the unborn. usually a mild sedative, such as phenobarb or 151 rum (2 shots), will do the trick. of course when they wake up they're going to hate you. this is for information purposes only and not for experimentation. respt submitted dads-freehold

    if your going to be a savage, be a headhunter
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    TOOLS1TOOLS1 Member Posts: 6,133
    edited November -1
    Toolbabe has had six. I guess that would make her qualified to give advtce on this matter. She claims that haveing intercoruse will get things going. And Ishe dont mean the time nine months ago.
    TOOLS

    General TOOLS RRG

    When I was a child, I thought as a child. But now that I am grown, I just wish I could act like a child and get away with it.
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    paboogerpabooger Member Posts: 13,953
    edited November -1
    It might be worth a try, but she might be in a real sour mood, if you even try to get close to that thing!!! Id keep my tallywhacker to myself if I were you!!!!


    "Can any body point me in the direction of the bathroom, I really gotta go "
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    IconoclastIconoclast Member Posts: 10,515 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    7mm, the method you've been using and the rough roads worked for us. But I did miss opening day of duck season for the birth of my daughter. Man, listen to mabooger and Varmintmist. If your wife ever even thinks you contemplated going hunting while she was in labor, you will be (a) lucky to live through it, (b) likely wish you had not and (c) quite possibly headed for the driest time of your life, if not the big "D."

    I think you were kidding . . . at least I sure hope you were . . . but man, even as a joke, your wife will not be amused. I may be corrected by the women here, but I rather think she'd be less upset if you had gone hunting before or after your wedding ceremony. My best friend was granted an August wedding when the bride was informed an October ceremony would see the groom and best man dressed in cammies and mud . . . and only then if it were storming or we had our limits. That was taken with ill grace, but to skip the birth of your child . . . . OUCH! NO!!
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    TOOLS1TOOLS1 Member Posts: 6,133
    edited November -1
    The Point is that * is a softner if you will, I am serious, You need to have sex with your wife on her back and a pillow under her pelvis. You need to be as deep as possible and to insert an EMPTY diaphram to hold the * up against the cervic. This is not to be rude but the more offten you can do this the better ...bumpy roads are a silly Idea and could cause the crevic to swell and be tighter! Try a enema, a very active bowel can cause contractions but many babies dont or wont come unless THEY FEEL LIKE IT !!

    IF the doctor wonte budge on his efforts She can always call and cancel till tuesday I must warn you that Inducing is hard on mom and baby, I would ask for a sonagram and ask for the radiologists opnion about the Head size and fermur legenth as these are a sign of viability. you want to get it out but only at the best time for the baby, not what is convient for the doctor or its daddy I would want to know that this is being done at least one full week AFTER the due date and not to let it go past two weeks after the date

    There is always the old saying that: when apples are ripe they fall from the tree!

    At the very least get a stress test every other day at the office to see that every thing is good for the baby but dont rush it to come unless there is an imeidate risk in the health of the baby or...UNLESS MOM sayes GET IT OUT NOWWWWWW>>>>>>>>>>> just hang in there

    let us know what it is and if you dont get the kind you want sent it to me and I will love it to pices!
    TOOL BABE



    General TOOLS RRG

    When I was a child, I thought as a child. But now that I am grown, I just wish I could act like a child and get away with it.
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    nunnnunn Forums Admins, Member, Moderator Posts: 36,037 ******
    edited November -1
    This thread is getting a little graphic.

    There will be other deer seasons, but you will have to live with that woman a long time. Stay home.

    SIG pistol armorer/FFL Dealer/Full time Peace Officer, Moderator of General Discussion Board on Gunbroker. Visit www.gunbroker.com, the best gun auction site on the Net! Email davidnunn@texoma.net
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