In order to participate in the GunBroker Member forums, you must be logged in with your GunBroker.com account. Click the sign-in button at the top right of the forums page to get connected.
Options

Health jokes

savage170savage170 Member Posts: 37,474 ✭✭✭✭
edited August 2016 in General Discussion
For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.

1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Brits.
2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Brits.
3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Brits.
4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Brits.
5. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Brits.

CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills


And remember:

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO-HOO, what a ride!!"

Comments

  • Options
    mrmike08075mrmike08075 Member Posts: 10,998 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    I am now the recipient of a free subscription to "Cancer" magazine.

    It's focus is folks with stage 3 and stage 4 cancer.

    I called the publishers office to ask them to correct the spelling of my name...

    The poor 20 something millennial gal I talked to was a bit upset about not doing well at her 1st job real job.

    Seems she is to follow up after 12 months and get you to renew your subscription.

    Turns out very few people answer her calls - or have numbers no longer in service.

    I did not have it in me to tell her that most of her follow up list folks were dead.

    There is a joke here somewhere...

    Mike
  • Options
    spasmcreekspasmcreek Member Posts: 37,724 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    she could send the subscriptions to the waiting rooms of funeral homes
  • Options
    mogley98mogley98 Member Posts: 18,297 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    [:D]It must be the accent
    Why don't we go to school and work on the weekends and take the week off!
  • Options
    glynglyn Member Posts: 5,949
    edited November -1
  • Options
    reload999reload999 Member Posts: 3,080 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
  • Options
    AzAfshinAzAfshin Member Posts: 2,986 ✭✭
    edited November -1
  • Options
    jeffb1911jeffb1911 Member Posts: 2,112 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by mrmike08075
    I am now the recipient of a free subscription to "Cancer" magazine.

    It's focus is folks with stage 3 and stage 4 cancer.

    I called the publishers office to ask them to correct the spelling of my name...

    The poor 20 something millennial gal I talked to was a bit upset about not doing well at her 1st job real job.

    Seems she is to follow up after 12 months and get you to renew your subscription.

    Turns out very few people answer her calls - or have numbers no longer in service.

    I did not have it in me to tell her that most of her follow up list folks were dead.

    There is a joke here somewhere...

    Mike



    They probably have not told her yet, or she has not figured it out. Thus the reason you got a person who this is the first few weeks on the job.
  • Options
    mrmike08075mrmike08075 Member Posts: 10,998 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    It's kind of funny - sad.

    I smuggled a microwave popcorn bag into the radiation therapy lab last week and layed it on my chest as they prepped to zap me - said we could all share it after it popped during treatment.

    Trying to maintain a sense of humor.

    Mike
Sign In or Register to comment.