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Second Opinion (joke)

A J ChristA J Christ Member Posts: 7,534
edited July 2005 in General Discussion
The doctor said, "Joe, the good news is I can cure your headaches. The bad
news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition,
which causes your testicles to press on your spine, and the pressure creates
one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove
the testicles."

Joe was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for.
He had no choice but to go under the knife.

When he left the hospital he was without a headache for the first time in
20 years, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself. As
he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person.
He could make a new beginning and live a new life.

He saw a men's clothing store and thought, "That's what I need - a new
suit." He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit."

The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see... size 44 long."

Joe laughed, "That's right, how did you know?"

"Been in the business 60 years!" the tailor said.

Joe tried on the suit It fit perfectly.

As Joe admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about a new
shirt?" Joe thought for a moment and then said, "Sure." The salesman eyed
Joe and said, "Let's see, 34 sleeve and 16-1/2 neck."

Joe was surprised, "That's right, how did you know?"

"Been in the business 60 years!"

Joe tried on the shirt, and it fit perfectly.

Joe walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about
some new underwear?"

Joe thought for a second and said, "Sure."

The salesman stepped back, eyed Joe's waist and said, "Let's see... size

Joe laughed "Ah ha! I got you! I've worn size 34 since I was 18 years old."

The salesman shook his head, "You can't wear a size 34. A 34 underwear would
press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell
of a headache."

Operation = $5000

New suit = $400

New shirt = $ 36

New underwear = $ 6

Second opinion = PRICELESS


  • stevegsteveg Member Posts: 845 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    now thats funny
  • zipperzapzipperzap Member Posts: 25,057
    edited November -1
    Good one!

    Good humor has pretty much left this board. Too bad.
    It's a pretty good people attraction - many drift to
    where the chuckles are.
  • zipperzapzipperzap Member Posts: 25,057
    edited November -1
    Here's one more ...

    Should children witness child birth?

    This is one of the funniest! Pass it along!

    Due to a power outage, only one paramedic responded to the call.

    The house was very, very dark, so the paramedic asked Kathleen,
    a 3-year-old girl, to hold a flashlight high over her Mommy so he
    could see while he helped deliver the baby. Very diligently, Kathleen
    did as she was asked. Heidi pushed and pushed, and after a little
    while Connor was born. The paramedic lifted him by his little feet
    and spanked him on his bottom. Connor began to cry.

    The paramedic then thanked Kathleen for her help and asked the
    wide-eyed 3-year old what she thought about what she had just
    witnessed. Kathleen quickly responded, "He shouldn't have crawled
    in there in the first place ......... smack his * again!
  • ginmartiniginmartini Member Posts: 250 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
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