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Senator dies and goes to see St. Peter....JOKE
matwor
Member Posts: 20,594
> While walking down the street one day, a US senator is tragically hit
by a
> truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at
the
> entrance.
>
> "Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems
> there
>
> is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you
see,
> so
> we're not sure what to do with you."
>
> "No problem, just let me in," says the man.
>
> "Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do
is
> have
> you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose
where to
> spend eternity."
>
> "Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the
senator.
>
> "I'm sorry, but we have our rules."
>
> And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes
down,
> down,
> down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a
green
> golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of
it
> are all
> his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. Everyone
is
> very
> happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand,
and
> reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the
expense
> of the
> people. They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster,
caviar
> and
> champagne.
>
> Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has
a
> good
>
> time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time
that
> before
> he realizes it, it is time to go.
>
> Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator
rises.
> The
> elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St.
Peter is
> waiting for him.
>
> "Now it's time to visit heaven."
>
> So, 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls
> moving
> from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good
time
> and,
> before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by, and St. Peter
returns.
>
> "Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now
choose
> your eternity."
>
> The senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I would
never
> have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I
> would
> be
> better off in hell."
>
> So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down,
down to
> hell.
> Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren
land
> covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in
rags,
> picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls
from
> above.
> The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder.
>
> "I don't understand," stammers the senator. "Yesterday I was here
and
> there
> was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank
> champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a
wasteland
> full of
> garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?"
>
> The devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were
campaigning.
> .
> ..
> .. Today you voted."
>
by a
> truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at
the
> entrance.
>
> "Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems
> there
>
> is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you
see,
> so
> we're not sure what to do with you."
>
> "No problem, just let me in," says the man.
>
> "Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do
is
> have
> you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose
where to
> spend eternity."
>
> "Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the
senator.
>
> "I'm sorry, but we have our rules."
>
> And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes
down,
> down,
> down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a
green
> golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of
it
> are all
> his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. Everyone
is
> very
> happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand,
and
> reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the
expense
> of the
> people. They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster,
caviar
> and
> champagne.
>
> Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has
a
> good
>
> time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time
that
> before
> he realizes it, it is time to go.
>
> Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator
rises.
> The
> elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St.
Peter is
> waiting for him.
>
> "Now it's time to visit heaven."
>
> So, 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls
> moving
> from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good
time
> and,
> before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by, and St. Peter
returns.
>
> "Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now
choose
> your eternity."
>
> The senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I would
never
> have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I
> would
> be
> better off in hell."
>
> So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down,
down to
> hell.
> Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren
land
> covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in
rags,
> picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls
from
> above.
> The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder.
>
> "I don't understand," stammers the senator. "Yesterday I was here
and
> there
> was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank
> champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a
wasteland
> full of
> garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?"
>
> The devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were
campaigning.
> .
> ..
> .. Today you voted."
>
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