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Jokes of the Day.

AlpineAlpine Member Posts: 15,041 ✭✭✭✭
edited May 2002 in General Discussion
GOOD:
A policeman had a perfect spot to watch for speeders but wasn't
getting many. Then he discovered the problem: a 10-year-old boy
was standing by the road with a hand-painted sign which read,
"RADAR TRAP AHEAD." The officer then found a young
accomplice down the road with a sign reading "TIPS" and a
bucket full of change. (And we used to just sell lemonade!)


BEST:
A young woman was pulled over for speeding. As the motorcycle
officer walked to her car window, flipping open his ticket book, she
said, "I bet you are going to sell me a ticket to the Highway
Patrolmen's Ball." He replied, "Highway patrolmen don't have balls."
There was a moment of silence while she smiled, and he realized what
he'd just said. He then closed his book, got back on his motorcycle
and left.
She was laughing too hard to start her car for several minutes.

If you ain't got pictures, I wasn't there.
?The problem with socialism is that you eventually run out of other people's money.?
Margaret Thatcher

"There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and statistics."
Mark Twain

Comments

  • PerrograndePerrogrande Member Posts: 52 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    As you are receiving e-mail, it's wise to remember how easily this wonderful technology can be misused, sometimes unintentionally and with serious consequences.

    Consider the case of the Illinois man who left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail.

    Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's wife, whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor in a dead faint. Hearing the scream, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:

    "Dearest Wife,

    Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

    P.S. Sure is hot down here!"
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