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Bringing my father home to hospice

powdersmokepowdersmoke Member Posts: 3,241
edited February 2004 in General Discussion
At home right now. We got in from the Hospital a little while ago. It looks like they will bring my father home Tomorrow and hospice will take over. He will not get better unless something totally unforseen occurs. Dad was very lucid today, alert and conversive, like night and day from just yesterday, when he was dilerious and unaware. One of his best days in a week. Maybe it was the news he would be going to his own home that picked up his spirits and made him feel better. Tomorrow morning Hospice will set up a bed and whatever equipment they need at his home. Then they will bring him by ambulance in the afternoon. We figure it will be very tiring for him and will limit visitors until Tuesday. They still say there is nothing more they can do for him but make him comfortable. The doctor did say he may surprise all of us, but then, he didn't change his diagnosis.

Getting used to the idea, as much as I can, as much as I hate it, that my father is dying. Sometimes it just doesn't seem possible. The longer it can be put off, as long as he is comfortable, the better.


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Comments

  • Big Sky RedneckBig Sky Redneck Member Posts: 19,752 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Powder, try not to think of what is coming, go be with him and visit as you usualy would, enjoy the time you have left with him. When the time is right say goodbye, God has given you the chance to do so. I am still mad at God and will never forgive him for not giving me that chance with Mom, he just took her with no warning, I will never forgive him.

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  • SwwboSwwbo Member Posts: 1,255 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    I'm still keeping you and your family in my prayers.. Hospice is wonderful.. They helped us out so much with Mom.... Hospice took care of things during the day and we stayed with Mom during the evenings and night..When the time arrived for Mom to go be with her maker we called Hospice.. They were at the house within minutes. They took over from there...Hospice also helped Dad take care of the bills that arrived after Mom died.

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  • jsergovicjsergovic Member Posts: 5,526
    edited November -1
    Most folks like the dignity of being "home". Grandfather and Grandmom both used the services of hospices staffed by religious orders.

    My Dad sure wouldn't want to be any place but home, and me, myself, I think, if it were possible, I'd pick a stretch of beach miles from any habitation on the south-west coast of Hawaii and just sit it out.

    Again, we're here to talk anytime you want...
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  • elect1mikeelect1mike Member Posts: 4,585 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    My dad went into the hospital on a sunday cause he could not bear weight on his legs and died tuesday morning ( he had leukemea ) I never even got to say goodbye. Hold on to him as long as the lord allows and love him.

    col elect1mike Illinois
    volinters RRG
    I am a man but I can change if I have to,I guess.
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  • punchiepunchie Member Posts: 2,792 ✭
    edited November -1
    powdersmoke
    As Swwbo said, our prayers are still to your father and his loved ones. It was my mother that we lost last April and I know that 'knowing' doesn't make it any easier. Any time that you feel like venting or just want a shoulder to rest on, let us know.

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  • allen griggsallen griggs Member Posts: 35,695 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    It is so much better that you can have him at home, than to be in a hospital. It is so impersonal in the hospital.
    Hang in there, it is going to be a tough time.
    We all have to pass on eventually so do with your Dad as you would wish someone to do for you when it is your time.
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  • dheffleydheffley Member Posts: 25,000 ✭
    edited November -1
    Prayers will continue. Keep us posted.

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  • kingjoeykingjoey Member Posts: 8,636
    edited November -1
    Sorry to here about this, the hospice programs are nice though. It's beneficial to be able to spend time with loved ones at home rather than in the stuffy hospital atmosphere. If there's anything I can do to help, drop me a line[:I]

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  • TwoDogsTwoDogs Member Posts: 2,011 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    My prayers are with you....
    Cowboy up...(stay strong)
    I know your emotions will run the board..
    Been there...and it's very tuff...
    Gods speed...

    Twodogs..

    "Always drink upstream from the herd"
    Will Rogers
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  • concealedG36concealedG36 Member Posts: 3,566 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    You and your family are in our thoughts, powdersmoke; I'm sorry. I lost a dear family member not too long ago and it was hard. Hospice really helped a lot, they are good people.

    Don't waste any of the precious time you and your father have left. Tomorrow isn't guaranteed for anyone so you have a unique opportunity to say goodbye that many don't get.

    G36



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  • jjmitchell60jjmitchell60 Member Posts: 3,887
    edited November -1
    Powder, hospice people are a God send. My friends wife is highly involved in hospice in Adams Co&Brown Co Ohio and Mason&one other county in KY. They do help a lot and go through a lot with their patients. He is in good caring hands with hospice involved. I know it does not ease your pain but they will help your father in any way they can. Our thoughts are still with you and you family.

    The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.
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  • stanmanstanman Member Posts: 3,052
    edited November -1
    Powdersmoke,
    I went through the same thing with my own father 3 yrs. ago last month. I still miss him, think about him every day and regret things that went unsaid.
    Hospice is a good org. to work with. Some really fine people work for them and for the most part, they are compassionate and caring.
    But remember, if they send you somebody that you or your dad don't feel good about, ask Hospice not to send that person again and to please send someone else.
    No point in taking any garbage when time is so precious.
    You have my most heartfelt sympathies and I wish you and your whole family peace and strength.
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  • rdcinmnrdcinmn Member Posts: 655 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    Sorry to hear of your sorrow, But I think it's good that your bringing home.

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    "Any people anywhere, being inclined and having the power, have the right to rise up and shake off the existing government and form a new one that suits them better. This is a most valuable, a most sacred right - a right which we hope and believe is to liberate the world." -- Abraham Lincoln, 1848
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  • temblortemblor Member Posts: 2,153 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Godspeed and my prayers to your Father,yourself and the rest of your family.I can tell he is a good man by the way you've typed about him.Be glad that you've had a good one for what time the Lord will allow. Lot's of people are never fortunate enough to have someone like him in their lives. The ones that are the hardest to lose are the ones we were luckiest to have had.........
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  • plains scoutplains scout Member Posts: 4,563
    edited November -1
    When you are with your dad, if he is too weak to carry on conversation, talk to him about all the good times you had with him. Talk to him about all the great things he did for you. Let him know that you could not have had a better person for your Dad. Even if he is not talking back, every father's dream is to know that their children appreciated what they did to make their kids life the best they could. Make his last days his best.

    God works in myserious ways and all things are possible. But in the end I am sure your father will, if he has not already, accept God's will. Hope you can do the same Powder. It is harder for you than him.

    In my prayers Pard.





    "A strong body makes the mind strong. As to the species of exercises, I
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  • 0311marine0311marine Member Posts: 3,233
    edited November -1
    my prayers are with you and your family

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  • alledanalledan Member Posts: 19,541
    edited November -1
    Strong prayers on the way for your father!!

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  • greeker375greeker375 Member Posts: 3,644
    edited November -1
    PS

    All that can be said has already been said above. I'll just lend my voice to others. GOD be with your family at this time.

    "the difference between the almost right word and the right word is like the difference between a lightning bug and a lightning bolt" - Mark Twain.
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  • bigdaddyjuniorbigdaddyjunior Member Posts: 11,233
    edited November -1
    I just spent the day visiting my Dad. I can't imagine what you are going through. I wish him a peaceful passage into the next life.

    040103cowboy_shooting_one_gun_md_clr_prv.gifBig Daddy my heros have always been cowboys,they still are it seems
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  • outdoortexasoutdoortexas Member Posts: 4,780
    edited November -1
    Thoughts are with ya powder,
    not much any of us can do but wish the family well.
    Glad to hear his wish to be home was granted.
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  • RancheroPaulRancheroPaul Member Posts: 1,459 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    My thoughts and prayers are with you and your Dad......
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  • IconoclastIconoclast Member Posts: 10,515 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    I'm glad your Dad will be home; I've seen how much it means. May you find solace in whatever sustains you.

    "There is nothing lower than the human race - except the French." (Mark Twain) ". . . And DemoCraps" (me)
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