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"MANAGEMENT COURSE"
Jungle Jim
Member Posts: 264 ✭
Management Course
Lesson Number One
****************
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.
A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you
and do nothing all day long?" The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson?
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson Number Two
****************
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to
the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but Ihaven't got the
energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied
the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump
of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after afourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly
spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
Management Lesson?
Bull Crap might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
Lesson Number Three
*****************
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird
froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying
there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird
lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was.
The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Management Lesson?
1) Not everyone who craps on you is your enemy.
2) Not everyone who gets you out of crap is your
friend.
3) And when you're in deep crap, it's best to keep
your mouth shut!
Here endeth your management course.
"De Oppresso Liber"
Lesson Number One
****************
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.
A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you
and do nothing all day long?" The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson?
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson Number Two
****************
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to
the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but Ihaven't got the
energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied
the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump
of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after afourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly
spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
Management Lesson?
Bull Crap might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
Lesson Number Three
*****************
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird
froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying
there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird
lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was.
The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Management Lesson?
1) Not everyone who craps on you is your enemy.
2) Not everyone who gets you out of crap is your
friend.
3) And when you're in deep crap, it's best to keep
your mouth shut!
Here endeth your management course.
"De Oppresso Liber"
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