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How would you beat Bin Laden.

alledanalledan Member Posts: 19,541
edited September 2001 in General Discussion
I would perpetrate acts just like he does but on his own kind and make it look like he did it. This would turn his "friends and followers" into his enemies! He then would have to fight on two fronts.JHMO!
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  • 5db5db Member Posts: 1,621 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Slowly with the ribcage af a pig!
    If you have one shot...Accu-Shot Website
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  • RembrandtRembrandt Member Posts: 4,486 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    5db, Saxon Pig isn't going to appreciate having sore ribs....Have always been intrigued with the old indian method of staking em' out on an ant hill on a hot day....after a camel deficates on his face. Maybe skin him with a dull potato peeler then salt him down. I'm sorry...got carried away. Seriously I think you have the right idea of a sting that turns his own people against him. [This message has been edited by Rembrandt (edited 09-15-2001).]
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  • Bubba JoelBubba Joel Member Posts: 5,161
    edited November -1
    Well, if you have a weak stomach, I'd suggest you not read any further;I would force him to come to my house 5 days a week and eat my wife's cooking.....OH, it's just to horrible to think about......AAAARRRGGGHHH........lol
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  • RosieRosie Member Posts: 14,525 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Bubba, My wifes meat loaf would do the trick. Rosie
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  • kimberkidkimberkid Member Posts: 8,858 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    My wife seems to think we need to do it very slowly, like maybe start by plucking every hair from his body using a modified electrolysis kinda thing, a 5000 volt or something (not strong enough to make him pass out) after that I like the the old indian method of staking em' out on an ant hill on a hot day....after a camel deficates on his face. Maybe skin him with a dull potato peeler then salt him down as suggested before.I guess I'm not creative enough to come up with much, but how about before starting all that, make sure he's already started a bad bad acid trip? ... surely our government could arrange/allow that too???
    GUN CONTROL: If you're not outraged, you're not paying attention!kimberkid@gunbroker.zzn.com
    If you really desire something, you'll find a way ?
    ? otherwise, you'll find an excuse.
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  • 5db5db Member Posts: 1,621 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    well I thought about staking him out, maybe on the Empire State Building, partially disemboweled and allowing the ravens to feast.
    If you have one shot...Accu-Shot Website
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  • NEEDCOLDNEEDCOLD Member Posts: 134 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Start with friends of his family, then his friends, then his family. Slow and painful deaths with rusty and dull machetes.When we get a hold of him, get some gay midgets (about 10) and they prison-style gang rape him. Then a week later bigger midgets do him. And every week after that a new group does it, systematically, until the sob's guts fall out. Even Allah will not save him then. And make them eat bacon.Maybe I have too much time on my hands ...
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  • legn4legn4 Member Posts: 481 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Handcuff him inside a NY subway traincar.Shouldn't take long.
    Work'n like a dog all nite
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  • SP TigerSP Tiger Member Posts: 872 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    I like legn4's idea, but at this point, one motivated Marine and his rifle would be enough for me. A thirty-caliber round to the forehead would be just fine. Although I will admit it's not painful enough. Blow his freakin' knee caps off first, then a round through his nads, if he has a pair, he does wear dresses.
    Better to have and not need, than need and not have.
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  • will270winwill270win Member Posts: 4,845
    edited November -1
    I shot expert on the range last week, I'm sure I can take out a kneecap or two before the brain turns into red and gray jello.I would rather beat his toes and fingers one at a time while he's on the phone with his momma.
    You can run, but you'll just die tired!Reduce, Reuse, Recycle, RELOAD!
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  • 5db5db Member Posts: 1,621 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Come on guys, you are going way too quick here. How about after, as woodsmith42 pointed out, the ravens refuse to pull at his disemboweled body tied to the Empire State building, staking him down and start dropping pig carcasses on him from say 20 feet, slowly increasing the size of pig and state of discomposure of said pig. This could last for at least a week. Then we could.....
    If you have one shot...Accu-Shot Website
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  • RembrandtRembrandt Member Posts: 4,486 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    How about a good dose of Radiation poisoning.....not too much, want to make the side effects last as long as possible. Then make him sleep with Hillary, Janet Reno, or Rosie O'Donnell....being around that much pork should about finish him off....and Allah won't want anything to do with him either. [This message has been edited by Rembrandt (edited 09-15-2001).]
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  • Walt NunleyWalt Nunley Member Posts: 228 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    First you wrap him in pigskin then dismember him alive and bury the parts in different places thusly assuring that he never ever gets to heaven,according to his religion anyway.I think that leaving him in the "custody" of the N.Y.P.D. would the most lethal and most just thing we could do for him.Rodney King only thought he had it bad
    Submarine Sailor,Truck Driver,and very bad typist.GO RUSTY #2
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  • concealedG36concealedG36 Member Posts: 3,566 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    I say torture him so that he learns of the pain he has caused (before we kill him). We could start by tying fishing line very tightly around his anatomy to restrict urine flow until his bladder bursts inside of him. Before we do that, though, we'll have to infect him with intestinal and heart worms and parasites so that he is already peeing blood. We'd want to super-glue his eyes open so that he couldn't sleep and squirt some jalapeno juice in them from time to time. Finally, we pull off his fingernails and soak his hands in powdered chlorine before letting him loose in the streets of Manhatten. Despite all the things I'd like to do, I'm sure that nothing we do (even ridding this earth of all of these extremists) will ever repair the damage that our nation has suffered. We'll rebuild our cities and the Pentagon and restore air travel, but the U.S. is forever changed.PROUD TO BE AMERICAN
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  • semi-autosemi-auto Member Posts: 50 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    Why, I'd beat him like a rag-headed stepchild, of course!
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  • RedlegRedleg Member Posts: 417 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    ala Pulp Fiction:--What now? Well let me tell you what now. I'm gonna call a couple hard pipe-hittin' mother f**kers, who'll go to work on Holmes here with a pair of pliers and a blow torch.Hear me talkin' hillbilly boy?! I ain't through with you by a damn sight. I'm gonna * Medieval on your *.----that pretty sums up what I would do...
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  • burn1bobburn1bob Member Posts: 603 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    save the soldiers, save the money, save the cruise missiles!! tactical nuke kabul, bagdad, and north korea too. anybody that dont like it can have one too.>bob
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  • KadaverKadaver Member Posts: 333 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    all i need is a spoon, a fingernail clipper, and about 48 hours to perform some "cosmetic" upgrades.
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  • ed in il.ed in il. Member Posts: 18 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    WITH ONE OF HIS ARMS OF COURSE!!!!!!!!!!!
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  • alledanalledan Member Posts: 19,541
    edited November -1
    If you gonna torture him do it in a hospital so that there are doctors around. This way you can have fun a long long long time!
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  • ghotie_thumperghotie_thumper Member Posts: 1,561 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    I saw a Bruce Willis movie, they had him strapped to a chair and his feet were bare and strapped to the legs of the chair. With the feet sitting flat on a concrete surface, the bad guy took a 2 pound sledge hammer and smashed the little toe, a little conversation took place, he then smashed the second toe. I think we could start with this method, Of Course giving the blood transfusions as necessary to keep the good times rolling. I guess after I did all 10 toes, or does Bin Laden only have 2 per foot,(cloven?), I'd have to get nasty and use a hacksaw to take the feet off at the ankles, Maybe sellem on Ebay. Tourniquet's applied to sharpen up the EMT skills then move back to the hammer and maybe some fingers. I think after going through the fingers up to the wrists with the hammer I'd show some mercy. Cut his nads off, stuffem in his blow hole then take the top of his head off with the 44 mag. Sorry, I'm not as artistic as some.
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  • BlueTicBlueTic Member Posts: 4,072
    edited November -1
    I always liked the one in the movie "ODEN" with Kirk Douglas - Stake him out in a tide pool area and let the crabs feed on him slowly as the tide comes in. I think I'd wrap him in old bacon first...
    IF YOU DON'T LIKE MY RIGHTS - GET OUT OF MY COUNTRY
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  • 44rugerfan44rugerfan Member Posts: 11 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    With a large baseball bat!
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  • dsr61172dsr61172 Member Posts: 4 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    Get Rosie O'Donnell to have sex with him!!! Then set him on the streets of New York and let the citizens do as they wish but ensure that they do it slowly!!!
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  • WyomingSwedeWyomingSwede Member Posts: 402 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    If you really want to get him you need to use his own kind against him.... Talk to Arafat...say he has 30 days to bring Bin Laden in to us. After 30 days...the US issues a statement that we will guarantee the current borders of Israel against all aggression and the palestinian problem is an internal matter to be handled by the government of Israel. If they dont bring him in...well there wont be a palestinian problem to deal with either. They will play ball at that point. JMHO Swede
    WyomingSwede
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  • axlerfanaxlerfan Member Posts: 713 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    a couple of things here...first, Ghotie...that was Mel Gibson, in Payback....second, why are we disgracing pig carcasses by allowing them to touch Bin Laden...? i mean, come on, even a pig deserves better than that in death...how bout being staked over a couple of bamboo shoots...? ive heard its painful..andthe bamboo doesnt care.
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  • sig-mansig-man Member Posts: 591 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Turn the mountian range he is hiding in into a big smoking hole in the ground, then take heavy earth moving equipment and level it off with sand.
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  • jltrentjltrent Member Posts: 9,337 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    I am not so sure that Bin Laden is the one totally responseable for this, if at all. As soon as this happened Iraq said immediately that they had nothing to do with this. From working with Juvenile Deliquents (would be in prison if not for their age)for fourteen years I have come to learn that the ones that denies first are the ones you better take a close look at. From the last I have heard Bin Laden is a suspect and it would be bad to go after him without making 100% sure. From taking American Diplomacy classes and seeing a lot of U.S. history from the other side we have made a lot of mistakes in our history and we need to be sure here and not let this happen.
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  • dheffleydheffley Member Posts: 25,000 ✭
    edited November -1
    I like the American Native style of punishment for killers. Stake them over a fire ant hill. Very long, very slow and very painful!
    Save, research, then buy the best.Join the NRA, NOW!Teach them young, teach them safe, teach them forever, but most of all, teach them to VOTE!
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  • alledanalledan Member Posts: 19,541
    edited November -1
    I,Like 99.9% of the populace have no knowledge or privvy to any enfluences or covert ops posed by our government. We have no way to tell really who started this mess.At this point it is all irrelevant anyway. The relevance is that the lines have been drawn in the sand do to speak.To what end will our retaliations bring is a question that is only answered by future events.My only regret is that our young fighting men will have to go into harms way. To lose these young warriors will take away from our future-our civilization.The petroleum industry is just like the lumber industry. They take advantage of greivious situations to profiteer. When a hurricane hits Florida, lumber goes thru the roof everywhere else and I will be damned if I see any shortage to justify a price increase.No one in the government seems to want to do anything about gouging vultures.
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  • concealedG36concealedG36 Member Posts: 3,566 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    Well, Arkresearch, if we DON'T do something that show's we're PISSED, then you can expect your views to cause you great harm when your countrymen riot. America will not accept a lack of forceful action against those perceived to have caused us this suffering. Even if Bin Laden is not responsible for this one, FACTS state that he is involved in other atrocities. I still say we find and kill him and his supporters. There are times for peace and there are times for war.PROUD TO BE AMERICAN
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  • whiteclouderwhiteclouder Member Posts: 10,574 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Let the people who know what they are doing, do what they have to do. While we sit here and blow enough hot air to melt the ice caps, the planning is going along quite well, I assure you. If you think we're pissed, think about the agencies who got caught with their pants around their ankles. They will exact full measure, count on it. As for us, we can't do anthing but pledge support for our leaders and nation. And pray.Clouder..
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