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Joke!
H.S. 10-X
Member Posts: 1,360 ✭✭✭✭✭
Three surgeons are having lunch talking about some of the cases that they have performed.
The first surgeon claims "I reattached a mans right arm and he went on to pitch a no hitter in a Major League baseball game."
"That's nothing", the second surgeon says. " I reattached both legs on a man, and he went on to win an Olympic Gold Medal in the marathon."
"I've got you both beat", the third surgeon says. "There was this woman who was drunk and stoned riding a horse and she got hit by a speeding train. All that was left was the horses * and some of her hair. I put all of the pieces back together and she eventually became a State Representative and Speaker of the House."
The first surgeon claims "I reattached a mans right arm and he went on to pitch a no hitter in a Major League baseball game."
"That's nothing", the second surgeon says. " I reattached both legs on a man, and he went on to win an Olympic Gold Medal in the marathon."
"I've got you both beat", the third surgeon says. "There was this woman who was drunk and stoned riding a horse and she got hit by a speeding train. All that was left was the horses * and some of her hair. I put all of the pieces back together and she eventually became a State Representative and Speaker of the House."
Comments
and pass a flower shop where the brunette happens to see her boyfriend
buying
flowers.
She sighs and says, "Oh, crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers
again...for no reason."
The blonde looks quizzically at her and says, "What's the big
deal, don't you like getting flowers?"
The brunette says, "Oh sure ... but he always has expectations
after getting me flowers, and I just don't feel like spending the next
three days on my back with my legs in the air."
The blonde says, "Don't you have a vase?"[:D][:D]
"Why a plumber?" ask the other two.
The first replies, "Because of all the damn water in here."
"That makes sense," reply the others.
Then, the second fetus says, "When I grow up, I'm gonna be an electrician."
"Why an electrician?" the others ask.
"Because it's so damn dark in here," replies the second.
"That makes sense too," the others comment.
The third one then says, "When I grow up, I'm gonna be a hunter."
"Why a hunter?" ask the other two.
The third replies, "Because if that damn gopher sticks his head up here one more time, I'm gonna kill it!"
A man, his wife and mother-in-law went on vacation to the Holy Land. While they were there the mother-in-law passed away. The undertaker told them, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here in the Holy Land for $150.00."
The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home. The undertaker asked , "Why?" Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your mother-in-law home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and spend only 150.00?"
The man said, "A guy died here 2000 years ago, he was buried here and three days later he rose from the dead.....
I can't take that chance."[:D]