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Presidents' Day Funnies!
ATF
Member Posts: 11,683 ✭✭✭
Presidents' Day Funnies!
A father noticed that his son was spending way too much time playing
computer games.
In an effort to motivate the boy into focusing more attention on his
schoolwork, the father said to his son, "When Abe Lincoln was your age, he
was studying books by the light of the fireplace."
The son replied, "Well, when Lincoln was your age, he was The President of
The United States."
* * * * *
These two country boys, brothers, were knocking around one lazy summer day
and thought it would be a good prank to push over the outhouse.
They crept up from an advantageous direction like a couple of commandos,
pushed the outhouse over on one side and headed for the woods. They
circled round and returned home an hour later from a completely different
direction thus, trying to divert suspicion from themselves.
Upon returning, their father approached them with switch in hand and
bellowed, "Did you two push the outhouse over this afternoon?"
The older boy replied, "As learned in school, I cannot tell a lie. Yes,
Father, we pushed over the outhouse this afternoon."
At this revelation, the farmer proceeded to flail the two boys severely
and sent them to bed without supper.
In the morning, the two boys meekly approached the breakfast table and
took their seats. Everything was quiet until their father finally said,
"Have you two learned your lesson?"
"Sure, Dad!" said the big brother, "But, in school we learned that George
Washington admitted to HIS father that he'd chopped down a cherry tree and
he was forgiven because he told the truth."
"Ah yes!' said the farmer, "BUT, George's DAD, wasn't in the cherry tree
when he chopped it down!"
[:)][:D][8D][;)][}:)][^][:0][:p]
It's my cat's world. I'm just here to open cans.
We got rid of the kids. The cat was allergic.
ATF,Eagle Guns
A father noticed that his son was spending way too much time playing
computer games.
In an effort to motivate the boy into focusing more attention on his
schoolwork, the father said to his son, "When Abe Lincoln was your age, he
was studying books by the light of the fireplace."
The son replied, "Well, when Lincoln was your age, he was The President of
The United States."
* * * * *
These two country boys, brothers, were knocking around one lazy summer day
and thought it would be a good prank to push over the outhouse.
They crept up from an advantageous direction like a couple of commandos,
pushed the outhouse over on one side and headed for the woods. They
circled round and returned home an hour later from a completely different
direction thus, trying to divert suspicion from themselves.
Upon returning, their father approached them with switch in hand and
bellowed, "Did you two push the outhouse over this afternoon?"
The older boy replied, "As learned in school, I cannot tell a lie. Yes,
Father, we pushed over the outhouse this afternoon."
At this revelation, the farmer proceeded to flail the two boys severely
and sent them to bed without supper.
In the morning, the two boys meekly approached the breakfast table and
took their seats. Everything was quiet until their father finally said,
"Have you two learned your lesson?"
"Sure, Dad!" said the big brother, "But, in school we learned that George
Washington admitted to HIS father that he'd chopped down a cherry tree and
he was forgiven because he told the truth."
"Ah yes!' said the farmer, "BUT, George's DAD, wasn't in the cherry tree
when he chopped it down!"
[:)][:D][8D][;)][}:)][^][:0][:p]
It's my cat's world. I'm just here to open cans.
We got rid of the kids. The cat was allergic.
ATF,Eagle Guns
Comments
IF YOU DON'T LIKE MY RIGHTS - GET OUT OF MY COUNTRY (this includes politicians)
I posted a version of the outhouse story around Halloween.
Semper Fi
Remember Ruby Ridge.
Experience is the best teacher and usually charges accordingly.
I keep looking for it on my calenders, and keep not finding it.
God Bless America and...
NEVER Forget WACO
NEVER, EVER Forget 911
"Go to Lakedaemon, stranger passing by;
And say there, that in obedience to her law, here we lie"
"White history month" is pretty much the other eleven. Try not to be so idignant about being in the majority, eh?[;)]
I live in Albany, Ga., I am the minority.
"Right is Right, even is everyone is against it, and wrong is wrong, even if everyone is for it"
Hmmm, didn't go up to Detroit with everyone else?[}:)]
There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
Hypocrisy is the homage paid by vice to virtue.
Don't assume malice for what stupidity can explain.