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humorous signs

Wild TurkeyWild Turkey Member Posts: 2,427 ✭✭✭✭
edited June 2002 in General Discussion
Septic Tank Truck sign reads: "We're #1 in the #2 business".

Sign over a gynecologist's office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

At a military hospital-door to colonoscopies: "To expedite your visit please back in"

On a Plumbers truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."

On the trucks of a local plumbing company "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."

Pizza shop slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one weak."

At a tire shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout."

Door of a plastic surgeon's office: "Hello. Can we pick your nose?"

At a towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We just want your tows."

On an electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts."

In a non-smoking area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."

On a maternity room door: "Push. Push. Push."

At optometrist's office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you have come to the right place."

On a taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff."

In a podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels."

-->On a fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive."

At a car dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."

Outside a muffler shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

In a veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

At electric company: "We would be de-lighted if you pay your bill.

However, if you don't, you will be."

In a restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry..Come on in and get fed up."

In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait."

At a propane filling station, "Tank heaven for little grills."

And don't forget the sign at a Chicago radiator shop: "Best place in town to take a leak."


Wild Turkey"if your only tool is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail"

Comments

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    daddodaddo Member Posts: 3,408
    edited November -1
    Sign at a bar and grill-
    "Sorry- we're open".
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    offerorofferor Member Posts: 8,625 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    I still say this is the best chat board for worthwhile humor I've ever encountered. How seldom have I ever encountered jokes worth passing on, elsewhere. Thanks for the laughs!

    - Life NRA Member
    "If cowardly & dishonorable men shoot unarmed men with army guns, the evil must be prevented by the penitentiary...and not by general deprivation of constitutional privilege." - Arkansas Supreme Court, 1878
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    Richie RichRichie Rich Member Posts: 439 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Sign a the bridge in Wickingburg,AZ....NO FISHING FROM THE BRIDGE.
    .
    .
    There hasn't been any water in there for 15 years.....

    Remember,"your woman may not find you handsome, But atleast she'll find ya handy". I love that show..............
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