Country Music Titles that never made it

idsman75

I got this from Mike Gallagher's website: www.mikeonline.com

"Does Your Chewing Gum Lose Its Flavor On The Bedpost Overnight?"
"Don't Cry On My Shoulders Cause Your Rustin' My Spurs"
"Drop-Kick Me, Jesus, Through The Goal Posts Of Life."
"Here's A Quarter, Call Someone Who Cares."
"How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?"
"How Can You Believe Me When I Say I Love You When You Know I've Been A Liar All My Life?"
"I Been Roped And Throwed By Jesus In The Holy Ghost Corral."
"I Can't Love Your Body If Your Heart's Not In It"
"I Don't Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling."
"I Fell In A Pile Of You, And Got Love All Over Me"
"I Flushed You From The Toilets Of My Heart."
"I Would Have Writ You A Letter, But I Couldn't Spell Yecch!"
"I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dawg Fight, Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win"
"I'm Gonna Hire A Wino To Decorate Our Home."
"I'm Just A Bug On The Windshield Of Life."
"I'm So Miserable Without You, It's Like Having You Here"
"I've Got Four On The Floor And A Fifth Under The Seat"
"I've Got Tears In My Ears From Lying On My Back In My Bed 'n' Cryin' Over You."
"If Love Were Oil, I'd Be A Quart Low"
"If You Don't Leave Me Alone, I'll Go And Find Someone Else Who Will"
"My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend, And I Sure Do Miss Him"
"Oh, Lord! It's Hard To Be Humble When You're Perfect In Every Way"
"Please Bypass This Heart"
"She Got The Gold Mine, And I Got The Shaft"
"Thank God And Greyhound She's Gone"
"When The Phone Don't Ring, Baby, You'll Know It's Me."
"You Done Tore Out My Heart And Stomped That Sucker Flat."
"You're The Reason Our Baby's So Ugly"

ace22

You forgot that old standby"How can I show you I love you when you won't lay down"

I'm not a hippy!I'm a well groomed mountain man

njretcop

I could be wrong, but I believe three of them actually made it:

"Drop Kick Me Jesus" (One of Bobby Bare's biggest hits)
"Here's a Quarter" (Travis Tritt)
"How you Going to Believe Me" (Several Artists)



Charlie the Jersey Cowboy

"It's the stuff dreams are made of Angel"<br>NRA Certified Firearms Instructor<br>Member: GOA, RKBA, NJSPBA, NJ area rep for the 2ndAMPD.<br> <A HREF="mailto:njretcop@copmail.com">njretcop@copmail.com</A> <P>

TrinityScrimshaw

I count five that came from actual songs, and some were hits.

Trinity +++

"Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it."(Proverbs 22:6)

Bushy AR

I wrote a country song once but it was rejected by Nashville...the title was "I'm sorry I made you cry,but at least your face is cleaner now" [:p]

Little people talk about people,regular people talk about things,and big people talk about ideas.

trsmith5

there's actually alot on that list that are songs but you forgot my favorite

"Your love's as hard as scraping nine day old grits from a frying pan"

WyomingSwede

Way to go...Ids, I love it!

Dont forget the immortal Freddy Hart and the Heartbeats who sang:

"If Fingerprints showed up on skin, I wonder whose I'd find on you..."

swede



moc.murofsmarerifehT

WyomingSwede

bhayes420

"She Got the Goldmine, I Got the Shaft" was a minor hit by Jerry Reed.

"Gonna Hire a Wino to Decorate Our Home" was released by David Frizzel and Shelly West around 1982 or 1983. Good song!

"Lord, It's Hard To Be Humble" was also actually a song. Can't remember the artist. Maybe Mac Davis? Heck, now I have the lyrics going nuts in my head!
"Oh Lord it's hard to be humble
When you're perfect in every way
I can't wait to look in the mirror
Cuz I get better lookin each day...

Some folks say that I'm egotistical
Hell I don't even know what that means
I guess it has something to do with the way
That I fill out my skin tight blue jeans..." Gotta be Mac Davis!

"They Tore Out My Heart and Stomped that Sucker Flat" is actually the title of a book by the late, great Lewis Grizzard.

njertcop is right about his three.



Taxation WITH representation isn't so hot either!

PJ

Remember "Where Were You When The Fit Hit The Shan"?
Pete

"Be kind to your neighbor, he knows where you live"

Jody Commander

I believe the late Lonnie Donegan did the chewing gum on the bed post,
She got the gold mine...Mel Tillis?
Thank god and greyhound was Roy Clark,

idsman75

I went back to Mr. Gallagher's website and I originally thought that this list was compiled in jest. Now I'm wondering if it's actually a list of real country song titles. Even funnier if it's so.

Jungle Jim

Some of you know that I was a writer in Nashville for several years.

The funniest songs I heard never made it like "I Can't Get Over You"
(Since You Got Under Me) "Bomb Bomb Bomb, Bomb Bomb Iran" (to the tune of the Beachboys Babara Ann), and I even wrote one called
"Go Grab An A - Rab" (If You're Tired of All This Mess", tried to get Ray Stevens to do it, but he thought it was too strong!

Most Country songs are title oriented; you hear the title of the song and know immediately what it's all about. (Sometimes!)

wipala

"Does Your Chewing Gum Lose Its Flavor On The Bedpost Overnight
(This is a novelty song and isn't western it's English)

"Here's A Quarter, Call Someone Who Cares

I'm Gonna Hire A Wino To Decorate Our Home."

"Oh, Lord! It's Hard To Be Humble When You're Perfect In Every Way"
Mac Davis
"She Got The Gold Mine, And I Got The Shaft"
Jerry Reed
Thank God And Greyhound She's Gone"
Roy Clark

Then said he unto them, But now, he that hath a purse, let him take it, and likewise his scrip: And he that hath no sword,let him sell his garment, and buy one

searcher5

Johnny Cash " Flushed from the bathroom of your heart" Really.

Proud member of the NRA

If it ain't broke-it ain't ours!!!

redcedars

umm, lets see....

"How Can I Miss You When You Won't Go Away?" written by Dan Hicks, recorded by Dan Hicks and His Hot Licks.

And I remember some lyrics to the "stomped" tune:

You done stomped all over my heart,
Yeah, you smashed that sucker flat.
You done sorta
Walked on my aorta


redcedars