Stories from Travel Agents...

Bubba Joel

Stories from Travel Agents:I had someone ask for an aisle seat on the plane so that herhair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.--A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. Aftergoing over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaperto fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?"--I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown. Istarted to explain the length of the flight and the passportinformation when she interrupted me with "I'm not trying tomake you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts."Without trying to make HER look like the stupid one, I calmlyexplained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is inAfrica." Her response; . . . click.--A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I askedwhat was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he wasexpecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that is notpossible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. Hereplied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map and Florida is avery thin state."--I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to seeEngland from Canada?" I said, "No." He said "But they look soclose on the map."--Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas.When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had a 1-hourlay-over in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent acar, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and I need acar to drive between the gates to save time."--A nice lady just called. She needed to know how it was possiblethat her flight from Detroit left at 8:20am and got intoChicago at 8:33am. I tried to explain that Michigan was an hourahead of Illinois, but she could not understand the concept oftime zones. Finally, I told her the plane went very fast, andshe bought that!--I just got off the phone with a man who asked, "How do I knowwhich plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, towhich he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but noneof these darn planes have numbers on them.--A woman called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-cola on one ofthose computer planes." I asked if she meant to fly toPensacola on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever."--A man called and had a question about the documents he neededin order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion aboutpassports, I reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I don't,I've been to China many times and never had to have one ofthose." I double checked and sure enough, his stay definitelyrequired a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've beento China four times and every time they have accepted myAmerican Express."--A woman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicagoto Hippopotamus, New York." The agent was at a loss for words.Finally, the agent asks: "Are you sure that's the name of thetown?" "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the customer.After some searching, the agent came back with, "I'm sorry,ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country andcan't find a Hippopotamus anywhere." The customer retorted, "Ohdon't be silly. Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!"The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finallyoffered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" "That's it! I knewit was a big animal!"