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Ten Good Reasons To Ban Guns

Josey1Josey1 Member Posts: 9,598 ✭✭
edited March 2002 in General Discussion
Ten Good Reasons To Ban Gunsa satire by Bruce Gold 1.) Guns are used in self-defense over 2 million times a year. However, this makes the attempted crime a "non-event," which necessarily complicates the Police investigation. Without civilian ownership of guns, these Police investigations would not have been compromised. Civilians should leave crime prevention to the Police, who are properly equipped to investigate following the crime's completion.2.) Some .004 % (4/1000 of 1%) of guns are used in crime each year. This is way too high. All guns should be banned3.) Guns are unnecessary. In 98% of civilian gun defenses, no shot is fired. If you are not going to fire a shot, you clearly don't need a gun. This proves that the guns are unnecessary. Banning guns will prevent these unnecessary defenses.4.) Guns cause criminal migration. In tough gun-law Washington, D.C., violent crime rates are very high. This high crime rate is caused by the migration of criminals from gun havens like Virginia. This migration is caused by the criminal's cowardly avoidance of armed householders and concealed-carry civilians. This criminal migration is detrimental to helpless unarmed citizens in no-gun areas and must be stopped. Guns should be banned everywhere.5.) Most gun crimes are committed by inner city gangs and drug dealers. These relatively small and geographically restricted groups consistently commit the majority of gun crimes, which usually peak as turf wars erupt over Drug War changes. The best way to prevent this is by denying guns to all law abiding people everywhere.6.) No woman needs to protect herself from rape, assault or murder. The Police will protect them by investigating the crime after the fact. Remember, Police paperwork is all the protection anyone really needs.7.) Guns owners are disrespectful of authority. Good citizens should completely rely on the authorities. A failure to do so is an invariable sign of improper and overly independent attitudes. Failure to completely and absolutely trust and depend on the authorities is excessive democracy and sends a bad message to children.8.) Guns owners engaging in self-defense are taking the law into their own hands. This is wrong. Only the Police and Criminals have the right to take the law into their own hands. It should be kept out of the hands of citizens.9.) Children and young people should remain ignorant about guns. Real guns and real gun knowledge dissipate the fantasies created by violent video games and TV. Ignorance, once lost, can never be restored and needs to be protected. Not to mention the lost sales of all the violent movies, TV shows, video games, etc!10.)Guns reduce people's reliance on the Police and Government. This fosters a mistaken belief in "rights". No person has the right to question authority. No person should be less than 100% dependent on authority. This is fundamental to social order. Banning guns will help to establish the Order the authorities want. This is good.Gun Control - Simple Solutions for Simple MindsCopyright (c) 1999-2002 by The ESCAPE Co. All rights reserved. http://www.federalobserver.com/archive.php?aid=1875

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    will270winwill270win Member Posts: 4,845
    edited November -1
    That's funny. Good one Josey; you're always good for a laugh!
    If you can't fix it with a hammer, take it to a mechanic. will270win@aol.com ~Secret Select Society Of Suave Stylish Smoking Jackets~
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    royc38royc38 Member Posts: 2,236 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    11. You can't call 911 if you have a two handed hold on a repeat felon drug user who is trying to do God knows what in your house at 0300hrs.( I am sure it is to leave a recipe for your wife for an excellent pie he learned in cooking school while in prison.)
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    JustCJustC Member Posts: 16,056 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    you sure he's not trying to stuff his guts back in?
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    BlueTicBlueTic Member Posts: 4,072
    edited November -1
    Another good one - sent to WA states gov.
    IF YOU DON'T LIKE MY RIGHTS - GET OUT OF MY COUNTRY (this includes politicians)
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    TED GARTED GAR Member Posts: 389 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    You forgot to include number 11.. It takes the authorities and average of 20 minutes or longer, to respond.
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    imadorkimadork Member Posts: 147 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    11. Guns should be taken away because they don't teach people the proper solutions to their emotional problems. People should learn to reason with criminals instead, perhaps telling robbers and rapists that their actions are "improper manifestations of inward aggression." If the criminal persists in robbing/raping a person, the victim should notify local social workers that the perpetrator was severely neglected in childhood. Remember kids, violence is never the solution!
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    cbxjeffcbxjeff Member Posts: 17,452 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Sure, imadork. Why can't we just love one another!
    cbxjeffIt's too late for me, save yourself.
    It's too late for me, save yourself.
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