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Fruitcake Recipe

nunnnunn Forums Admins, Member, Moderator Posts: 36,078 ******
edited December 2001 in General Discussion
Merry Christmas All! Enjoy the recipe - but don't drive after you make it! The Best Fruit Cake Ever Ingredients: 1 cup butter 1 cup sugar 4 large eggs 1 cup dried fruit 1 teaspoon baking powder 1 tablespoon lemon juice 1 cup brown sugar 1 cup nuts 1 or 2 quarts of aged whiskey Before you start, sample the whiskey to check for quality. Good, isn't it? Now go ahead. Select a large mixing bowl, measuring cup, etc. Check the whiskey again as it must be just right. To be sure the whiskey is of the highest quality, pour 1 level cup into a glass and drink it as fast as you can. Repeat. With an eclectic mixer, beat 1 cup of butterin a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 teaspoon of sugar and beat the hell out of it again. Meanwhile, at this parsnicular point in time, wake sure that the whixey hasn't gone bad while you weren't lookin. Open second quart if nestessary. Add 2 large leggs, 2 cups fried druit an beat til high. If druit gets shtuck in peaters, just pry the monsters loosh with adrewscriver. Example the whikstey again, shecking confistancy, then shift 2 Cups of salt or destergent or whatever, like anyone gives a @%#*. Chample the whitchey shum more. Shitf in shum lemon zhoosh. Fold in chopped sputterand shrained nuts. Add 100 babblespoons of brown booger or whushever's closhest and mix well. Greash ubben and turn the cakey pan to 350 decrees. Now pour the whole bissin' mesh into the washin' machine and set on winsh shycle. Check da whixney wunsh more and pash out.
Certified SIG pistol armorer/FFL Dealer/Full time Peace Officer, Moderator of the General Discussion Board on Gunbroker. Visit www.gunbroker.com, the premier gun auction site on the Net! Email davidnunn@texoma.net Jesus is Lord!
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Comments

  • BullzeyeBullzeye Member Posts: 3,560
    edited November -1
    Fruitcake's one of those kind of things where you have to make it REALLY well for it to be edible. I've had a few good ones, but most are stinkers.My sister-in-law sends me a fruitcake every year. I used to use it for target practice with my .308, but I stopped after ricochets became a serious threat.
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  • DaRoostaDaRoosta Member Posts: 270 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    I thought this was going to be about my family.
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  • Mom MomMom Mom Member Posts: 169 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Roosta, it's about MY in-laws. At least, it's kind of what they look like after noggin' the egg a little too much. See what happens when you marry a bunch of German Catholics?
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