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Plan 7 From Outer Space

Judge DreadJudge Dread Member Posts: 2,372 ✭✭✭✭✭
edited September 2002 in General Discussion
Plan 7 From Outer Space

by Edgar J. Steele

September 29, 2002

"We are all interested in the future, for that is where
you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives.
And remember, my friend, future events such as these
will affect you in the future."
---Criswell, Intro to "Plan 9 From Outer Space" (1958),
written, produced and directed by Ed Wood

President Bush received a good deal of condemnation a few months ago when
America's seven-nation nuclear hit list was leaked via a secret Pentagon
report.

It was easy to see why China, Russia, Iran, Iraq, North Korea, Syria and
Libya joined together in denouncing the secret Pentagon document, "Nuclear
Posture Review," as warmongering "lunacy," inasmuch as they were the seven
nations specifically targeted by the current administration. In
retaliation for "surprising military developments," was the report's
justification for use of such weapons by the world's sole remaining
superpower.

This was the point at which even Great Britain decided to stand apart from
America, you may recall. "The lunatics have taken over the White House,"
said Labour MP Alice Mahon at the time. The report was released as part of
an apparent campaign to get England in line with the US for its upcoming
invasion of Iraq.

But for this leaden trial balloon, America's War Against Terrorism likely
already would be mopping up the last bits of resistance in the outlying
neighborhoods of Baghdad.

Time runs short. With the November elections all but upon us, Bush must
push ahead now or risk losing ground in both federal and state
legislatures. War will unite us again, says the script, behind our
fearless and feckless leader.

Who writes this stuff? Did they exhume Ed Wood and install him in that
cubbyhole made famous by Monica? Some of the things coming out of Bush's
mouth make this a very real possibility.

Ed Wood was the wannabe Hollywood director who cranked out so many
appallingly-bad movies in the fifties and sixties. The worst of the lot,
by popular acclaim: "Plan 9 From Outer Space," cobbled together from stock
footage and shots of Bela Lugosi done just prior to his death and starring
Wood's friends and girlfriend. Plan 9 unofficially has been labeled the
worst movie ever made (by the worst film director who lived).

Wood was the original low-budget filmmaker, who all but let the resources
available to him write the scripts for his epics.

Plan 9 contemplated the takeover of Earth by aliens who regenerated the
dead to do their dirty work. The aliens sought to wipe out humanity before
it discovered the ultimate weapon, having already proven ourselves
incapable of behaving with nuclear weapons. Only clean living and the
American Way saved the day, of course.

Imagine Ed Wood in charge of a budget like that for "Titanic" or some other
blockbuster. That's the Hollywood equivalent of installing Bush as
President.

Am I the only one who still wonders just where in the world Bush came from,
by the way, back before the last Presidential primaries?

Imagine Bush as Ed Wood writ large, but for real! Even the genius behind
"Dr. Strangelove" could not have grasped the enormity of the tragicomedy
being written in the sands of the Middle East today.

Is this why our fathers fought World War II? Is this why my generation
gave so much in the blood-drenched jungles of Southeast Asia? So that Bush
could install his version of democracy-by-media-created-polling on the rest
of the planet?

In fairness, Bush has little to do with it. This is the implementation of
the New World Order, of course. The only surprise is that America is the
one doing it, when we always imagined that communism would be the boogeyman.

Oh, there is another surprise. That so many Americans apparently support
this so-called "war." Of course, I hardly ever encounter anybody in person
willing to say they support it. Maybe it's the circles in which I travel.
You don't think the media could be lying to us or that the poll numbers are
simply being made up....do you?

Just as a couple of earthmen are about to be taken aboard the mother ship
in Plan 9, one wonders aloud, "Wow...boy, how could anything that big hide
for so long a time?" The same might be asked about the NWO, only just now
heaving into view. Ed Wood's response likely would be the following actual
dialogue, taken from his classic "Plan 9 From Outer Space": (click here or
paste into your browser and turn up your speakers) -

http://www.badmovies.org/movies/plannine/plannine7.wav

Well, maybe not quite everybody. After all, you and I have figured it out
- and there are a few others, I know for a fact.

-ed

"I didn't say it would be easy. I just said it would be the truth."
- Morpheus

Copyright c Edgar J. Steele, 2002

Forward as you wish. Permission is granted to circulate
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1 megagogol contingent of pungent fly's cant be wrong ,eat dung!!!
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