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Report: Bin Laden Already Dead

hyperspacehyperspace Member Posts: 91 ✭✭
edited December 2001 in General Discussion
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,41576,00.html Report: Bin Laden Already Dead AP Wednesday, December 26, 2001Usama bin Laden has died a peaceful death due to an untreated lung complication, the Pakistan Observer reported, citing a Taliban leader who allegedly attended the funeral of the Al Qaeda leader."The Coalition troops are engaged in a mad search operation but they would never be able to fulfill their cherished goal of getting Usama alive or dead," the source said.Bin Laden, according to the source, was suffering from a serious lung complication and succumbed to the disease in mid-December, in the vicinity of the Tora Bora mountains. The source claimed that bin Laden was laid to rest honorably in his last abode and his grave was made as per his Wahabi belief.About 30 close associates of bin Laden in Al Qaeda, including his most trusted and personal bodyguards, his family members and some "Taliban friends," attended the funeral rites. A volley of bullets was also fired to pay final tribute to the "great leader." The Taliban source who claims to have seen bin Laden's face before burial said "he looked pale ... but calm, relaxed and confident."Asked whether bin Laden had any feelings of remorse before death, the source vehemently said "no." Instead, he said, bin Laden was proud that he succeeded in his mission of igniting awareness amongst Muslims about hegemonistic designs and conspiracies of "pagans" against Islam. Bin Laden, he said, held the view that the sacrifice of a few hundred people in Afghanistan was nothing, as those who laid their lives in creating an atmosphere of resistance will be adequately rewarded by Almighty Allah.When asked where bin Laden was buried, the source said, "I am sure that like other places in Tora Bora, that particular place too must have vanished."
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Comments

  • simonbssimonbs Member Posts: 994 ✭
    edited November -1
    BovineFeces.
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  • 7mm_ultra_mag_is_king7mm_ultra_mag_is_king Member Posts: 676 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Bullcrap Sounds like their version of the witness protection program. He's still hiding somewhere laughing about it. Dead of lung problems,,yeah right. ha ha ha he he he! Sure he did. And I have some beachfront property in Arizona I would like to sell.
    when all else fails........................
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  • ebeshirsebeshirs Member Posts: 382 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    Produce the body to the U.S.A............Then we'll talk.
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  • beachmaster73beachmaster73 Member Posts: 3,011 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    Before you guys start to poo-poo the report there may very well be an element of truth in it. The lung complications may very well have been brought on by a lack of oxygen caused by the proximate explosion of an American "daisy cutter" while bin Laden was squatting to take a dump. The serene expression on his face may very well have been one of intense concentration as bin Laden, in an advanced state of constipation brought on by a lack of water caused by his rodent-like running from one cave to another, visualized a bowel movement as a next to Allah experience. His very last vision and memory on this world may very well have been his own pile of feces as his face rapidly approached and then buried itself in his own filth....personally I like my version more than the raghead spin doctors version....and somehow I think mine is more accurate. Beach
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  • simonbssimonbs Member Posts: 994 ✭
    edited November -1
    That is a happy thought.
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  • Judge DreadJudge Dread Member Posts: 2,372 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    WELL of his over 200 clones how many have the marines gotten yet? I have told you before... the guy is in NY city zipping champange... enyoing the broads and I bet he will start the new year with a big bang !....
    Ignis Natura Renovatur Integram
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  • RembrandtRembrandt Member Posts: 4,486 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    I'm sure I saw him pumping gas down at the local convienence store about an hour ago...or was that Elvis?
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  • BullzeyeBullzeye Member Posts: 3,560
    edited November -1
    I saw him at Dread's house typing on the computer.
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  • b0400879b0400879 Member Posts: 256 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    the symptoms sound exactly like DCS disease.(Daisy Cutter Syndrome)BLU-82: cure for the common Taliban
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  • SXSMANSXSMAN Member Posts: 2,616 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Beach,you been taking elocution lessons from clouder?See more polish and elouence in your writing.I like your version too.Ohhh yes! Ift only it were true (sigh)!
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  • OtomanOtoman Member Posts: 554 ✭
    edited November -1
    I'll believe it when I see a Marine Carrying his Head only in his helmut!!!! helmut upside down, neck inserted first....
    KIMBER: Pistol du jour
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