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" How do these people survive???"
WyomingSwede
Member Posts: 402 ✭✭✭
This is some funny (scary?) stuff...
Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could
have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen
nuggets.
"We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at the counter.
"You don't?" I replied. "We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the reply.
"So I can't order a half-dozen nuggets, but I can order six?" That's right."
So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The paragraph above doesn't amaze me because of what happened a couple
of months ago. I was checking out at the local Foodland with just a few items
and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up
one of those "Dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed it
between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned
all of my items, she picked up the "Divider" looking it all over for the bar
code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said to me "Do you
know how much this is?" and I said to her "I've changed my mind, I don't
think I'll buy that today." She said OK" and I paid her for the things and left. She had
no clue to what had just happened.....
MAKES YOU WONDER HOW THESE PEOPLE CAN SURVIVE!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and
pulling it out very quickly. When inquired as to what she was doing, she
said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit
card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy".
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. Do you need
some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery
to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they
(pointing to a distant convenient store) would have a battery to fit this?"
Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm too?" I asked. No, just this remote
thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key
and manually unlocked the door, I replied, Why don't you drive over there
and check about the batteries. It's a long walk.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she
was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing
paper. What do I do?" Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her.
With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the
photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large motor home was towed
into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the
whole thing generally looked like an extra in Twister. " I asked the manager
what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the "cruise
control" and then went in the back to make a sandwich.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IDIOTS AT WORK... Sign in a gas station: Coke -- 49 cents. Two for a dollar.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IDIOTS & COMPUTERS... My neighbor works in the operations department in
the central office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when they
have problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a woman in
one of the branch banks who had this question: I've got smoke coming from
the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IDIOTS ARE EASY TO PLEASE: I was sitting in my science class, when the
teacher commented that the next day would be the shortest day of the year.
My lab partner became visibly excited, cheering and clapping. I explained to
him that the amount of daylight changes, not the actual amount of time.
Needless to say, he was very disappointed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a metal
colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine.
The message He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the
copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth.
Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Life is tough. It's tougher if you're stupid "
WyomingSwede
Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could
have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen
nuggets.
"We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at the counter.
"You don't?" I replied. "We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the reply.
"So I can't order a half-dozen nuggets, but I can order six?" That's right."
So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The paragraph above doesn't amaze me because of what happened a couple
of months ago. I was checking out at the local Foodland with just a few items
and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up
one of those "Dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed it
between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned
all of my items, she picked up the "Divider" looking it all over for the bar
code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said to me "Do you
know how much this is?" and I said to her "I've changed my mind, I don't
think I'll buy that today." She said OK" and I paid her for the things and left. She had
no clue to what had just happened.....
MAKES YOU WONDER HOW THESE PEOPLE CAN SURVIVE!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and
pulling it out very quickly. When inquired as to what she was doing, she
said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit
card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy".
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. Do you need
some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery
to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they
(pointing to a distant convenient store) would have a battery to fit this?"
Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm too?" I asked. No, just this remote
thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key
and manually unlocked the door, I replied, Why don't you drive over there
and check about the batteries. It's a long walk.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she
was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing
paper. What do I do?" Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her.
With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the
photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large motor home was towed
into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the
whole thing generally looked like an extra in Twister. " I asked the manager
what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the "cruise
control" and then went in the back to make a sandwich.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IDIOTS AT WORK... Sign in a gas station: Coke -- 49 cents. Two for a dollar.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IDIOTS & COMPUTERS... My neighbor works in the operations department in
the central office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when they
have problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a woman in
one of the branch banks who had this question: I've got smoke coming from
the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IDIOTS ARE EASY TO PLEASE: I was sitting in my science class, when the
teacher commented that the next day would be the shortest day of the year.
My lab partner became visibly excited, cheering and clapping. I explained to
him that the amount of daylight changes, not the actual amount of time.
Needless to say, he was very disappointed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a metal
colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine.
The message He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the
copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth.
Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Life is tough. It's tougher if you're stupid "
WyomingSwede
Comments
Or how they wound up that way?
The way I see it, maybe 80% are "out of Touch"
The reason? Dumb TV comercials, Soap Operas, Day time talk shows, Wrestling, No parental guidance, Politicaly correct school systems?
Lack of common sence!! and on and on!
Sad and scary!!
To keep my sanity, I look at it this way. The almighty put "out of touch people" on this earth for entertainment purposes only!
But on occasion they do breed!
Just my honest opinion, not ment to ruffle feathers here!
Of course I can play the piano, as long as it has pedals!
What saved her from working in a Burger King or airport security for the rest of her life was marrying a millionaire. Now she has a staff to handle all those problems of daily life. Go figure.
**I love the smell of Hoppes #9 in the morning**
Remember...Terrorist are attacking Civilians; Not the Government. Protect Yourself!
NRA Lifetime Benefactor Member.
Mudge the participant
I can't come to work today. The voices said, STAY HOME AND CLEAN THE GUNS!
~Secret Select Society Of Suave Stylish Smoking Jackets~
"Respect my authority"
If I knew then, what I know now.
This same Womans son went to apply for a job at a Movie Theater. The first thing he told the Manager was that he could not work nights or weekends.
Just proof thay do breed.
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