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Words of wisdom, please
Arielle
Member Posts: 348 ✭✭✭
Hi everyone. I'm on my way back to school, but I'm moving into an apartment this year instead of the dorms. So any advice or words of wisdom for a young girl living on her own? Well, away from the parents rather, because I will have a roommate. My parents are giving me plenty of "advice" (haha) and I'm really rtying to listen because I know they are right (how ironic I say to myself)
Arielle
I love myself and so should you!
Arielle
I love myself and so should you!
Comments
So any advice or words of wisdom for a young girl living on her own?
Don't acquire debt (especially credit card debt). You'll regret it.
Jacqueline
www.gratuitouslylongdomainname.com
"Necessity is the plea for every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants and the creed of slaves." -- William Pitt (1783)
Keep your parents advice close to heart as they would never steer you wrong and you can benefit from their mistakes and not make too many of your own.
Watch out for the boys, they are only after one thing (booty) when you go to partys never leave your drink unattended.
I got a million of em!
Ted Kennedy's car has killed more people than my gun has!
Keep your doors and windows locked at night or whenever you're alone.
Stay aware of your surroundings as college areas have a tendency towards higher crime rates.
If you jog or walk for exercise, DO NOT USE A WALKMAN. This marks you as a potential victim since any offendor will know that you can't hear them coming.
If you party, make sure to do so in moderation. You have your entire life to get drunk and make dumb mistakes but only this one chance to earn a decent GPA.
Make sure to attend class and ask questions. Even dumb questions will get you your professor's notice. And the notice of your professor is worth at least a letter grade.
Avoid musicians like the plague (am I making myself clear on this point?).
Don't eat at the school cafeteria. It's the same crap they serve prisoners if you're going to a public university and overpriced crap they couldn't serve to prisoners if it's private.
Call your folks at least once a week. They'll miss you.
That's about all the serious advice I have. I could probably fill another three hundred lines with jokes, but I'll keep quiet for now. Good luck!
Find out if there is a campus booktrade, especially an online one, and save yourself a fortune. *You said BACK to school so you probably already know this.*
It's easy to get sick of Ramen, but keep some around. When finances are tight those little packs are your best friends. Also, during finals, they might a crunchy meal especially good with barbecue sauce when you don't have the time to cook them.
Even with concrete walls, sound above a certain level carries very well. Keep this in mind when you decide to play Bone Thugs N harmony in the wee-morning hours. Other tenants can and will complain or make your life hell with their retaliation.
If the rent is due on the 2nd and late on the 5th; turn it in on the 1st. If there is a late-fee the office person is notoriously absent when you REALLY need to get it in.
Photo-copy EVERYTHING, especially the lease agreement you sign. Never know when it might come in handy.
Renter's insurance is your friend despite the extra cost.
If you must have a credit card, get one with a $500.00 limit. This saves you during moments of weakness.
No one is really safe on a campus. Last year a large male student was accosted and strangled in a well-lit parking lot approximately 250 feet from a 'security' building. Being a little paranoid will at worse make you look like a weirdo and at best save your life.
If you plan on having your own washer and dryer, limit use *yes this sometimes involves wearing a pair of pants more than once* and make sure each load is worth the use. Dryers REALLY suck down the juice, and it'll show up on your power bill.
On a related note, if your apartment complex pays for water, turn the AC temp up, turn the cold water on, and place a fan in front of it to keep your power bill manageable.
On that note your power bill will usually be $10-20 more than you think it should be.
All of my sage advice now in text; what are you studying?
Typos and profanity, oh my! http://www.funky-town.org
quote:Don't acquire debt (especially credit card debt). You'll regret it.
First of all, Jacqueline has some very important advise here. If money gets tight don't use credit cards, they will become excess baggage for the next 40 or so years.
Don't fall for that "Did anybody tell you that you have pretty eyes?" line!!! If a guy tells you that kick him in the wabols!!
Get you some mace and put it on your keyring, if any boy gets within 10 feet of you,,spray him with it!!
As soon as you get into your car, lock the doors immediately!! If a guy walks up and taps on the window to tell you what pretty eyes you have,,spray him with mace,,then kick him in the wabols!!
Let the word get around that it [B)]hurts[B)] to be near you!!
This is a sample of the advise that I gave my 19 year old daughter[^].
Plus DancesWithSheep has some really good advise also!!!
,,,sod
"The difference between Congress and drunken sailors is that
drunken sailors are spending their own money." --Florida Republican
Rep. Tom Feeney
I might add that if do use an answering machine,
have a male freind (or your Dad)do the message.
It may lead an "un-wanted visitor" to think that
you are not alone,but your "Friends" will know.
BW
IT'S WHAT PEOPLE KNOW ABOUT THEMSELVES THAT MAKES THEM AFRAID.
Learn to manage money. It isn't a class, though it should be. Basics like doing a checkbook and your taxes first, to learning about stocks and bonds later.
Start a IRA, NOW, TODAY. What little you can put in now will be a lot when you need it.
Learn to do without. Skip the food in the commons, make your own lunch. 2 reasons, you can eat somewhere quiet at any time, study while you eat or just stare at a tree for a while. You dont have to spend the cash and time it takes to get premade food.
If you do eat the school food, dont worry, its not like prison food. Prison food is much better. [:D]
Dont take a 5 credit technical night course, that meets only once a week.
Sced. a free day if you can, tues or thurs. Good days to catch up on sleep, study, shopping or laundry.
Those people who see nothing but grey areas, no black and white, are lost in the fog.
Measure twice, cut once.
Empty the clip!
I have helped my 2 girls thru college and it was a nightmare,try to help your parents cope. It is not easy for you or them. Good luck!
I would add that you will do much better if you remain disciplined and make sure to study before going out to party or whatever. If you dedicate the hours of 5-7 pm, for instance, to studying every day you will do much, much better and you'll find exams a pleasure and not nearly as stressful because you'll be prepared.
Good luck, have fun and be safe.
G36
Gun Control Disarms Victims, NOT Criminals
#1: Always remember: even small campuses in rural settings seem to attract weirdos (some of them are enrolled!).
Always be aware of your surroundings. (see #1)
Always keep doors / windows locked. (see #1)
Mix your own drinks or stick to bottled beer if you attend a party and keep it it in your posession. (see #1)
Do not keep anything of significant value at school (e.g., heirloom jewelry, regardless of sentiment or value).
Don't skip classes; repeat: don't skip classes . . . big temptation when they are some very boring required course at 0800 Monday.
Try to stay keep a regular pattern of sleep and exercise. You will be more mentally alert and far less prone to illness.
I don't agree with the comments about institutional food. Some school meals are inexpensive, nutritious and tasty.
Be very careful in your relationships. There are some real good young men out there. There are some cads. Most have an overabundance of hormones. All of those making similar comments here are not only fathers / brothers; we also know the male mindset.
The suggestions about credit cards, learning to manage money and taking sandwiches to campus are all X-rings.
Further suggestions:
Don't spend a lot of time or money on decorating / amenities. Campus living is notoriously fickle. You may fall out with your roommate, the landlord and / or neighbors may be real jerks, a better deal may come along. This isn't a home - it's temporary shelter. The more stuff you put in the place, the more you have to move / store / sell when the time comes.
If you plan to eat off campus, shop the specials and the warehouse stores. A small freezer can pay for itself in less than a semester. Hamburger & chicken are cheap in bulk and can serve as the protein base for hundreds of different dishes.
When you cook, make a lot and put up multiple individual servings in the freezer. It takes about the same amount of time, you only have to do the dishes once and this will give you a cache of decent meals to nuke in the microwave when you can use the time more productively. Stock the freezer early in the semester and then dedicate a few hours each week to cooking something new as the pre-cooked meals thin out (also a good time to run laundry while the food simmers and often you can do some light reading or write / call family as well - three birds with one stone!).
Use public transportation / walk / bike if it is safe and feasible. Costs less, gives you exercise while you do something you have to do anyway, and cars are a black hole for a student's money.
The world will function without a TV . . . in fact, it functions better without one.
One bit of philosophical advice: this is the one time of your life when no matter what you want to do, you will almost certainly have the opportunity and companions with whom to share the experience, so reach for the unusual. There will always be films, parties and the other pedestrian forms of entertainment. Do a semester / year abroad if it doesn't stretch the budget (many schools have reciprocal agreements with other institutions so one can do this for the same tuition and fees one would pay for staying home).
Find good friends, but seek out others from groups with whom you might not have had contact in the past - different ethnic / religious / geographic origins. It is a vital part of the learning experience and one all too few students explore. In my own case, I made it a point *not* to associate with those with whom I shared a common background . . . like TV, that will always be possible, but these "different" people often will not be around / available as you move into adulthood. I think it was one of the smartest things I did in my life.
Get a cheap life insurance policy if your parents have not already done this for you. It's unlikely, but if you should develop some chronic medical condition, you may be uninsurable or pay hefty premiums in the future. Once you have a basic policy, you can usually add to it.
Don't burn incense or candles (or allow your roommate to do so). Way too many fires caused by this in student housing.
Don't read Paradise Lost after noon; it will put you to sleep faster than Al Gore.
In general, use the common sense you've displayed in your posts.
Focus first on prevention. Don't be an easy target, and don't appear to be one. Think about the things you may have to do to defend yourself before you need to do it. There will be no time for these thoughts when the chips are down. If a person threatens you with serious * harm, and has the apparent intention and capacity to hurt you, that person deserves what they get. Be mentally prepared to do whatever is necessary to stop them.
Take a martial arts class; there are many benefits.
If it is legal, and after proper training, decide if you can safely carry a firearm, or keep one at your apartment. No margin for error here. Investigate the legality and practicality of other weapons too.
Its tough to get As in the hospital, and impossible from the morgue.
redcedars
Check it out with your registrar or advisor. Stands for College Level Examination Program. It counts as credit hours & you can take them while you are in college. They usually run about $50 or less. It is a great way of getting out of electives or boring expensive non-major requirements. I was able to get out of a whole semester, saving myself $7000 by taking CLEP tests. The tests are not hard & don't require that you study for them. If you've been in college a year already & have already passed your basic Western Civilization required class, look into taking a West Civ 2 test or a Fine Arts 1 or 2 test. They are really easy & will save you huge time & money.
2.Become a RA (Resident Assistant)
I worked as one for 2 years during college. Was a lot of fun & will help you learn what integrity & responsibility is. Both of those are learned not innate. Also it will give you a paycheck or a free place to live.
3.Don't apply for credit cards. Resist it!
4.Protect your social security number. Identity theft blows.
5.Sit in the front of the class, ask & answer questions. Get to know your profs. If you are having trouble in a class tell the prof. Ask if extra help is available. Just letting the prof know your name will make the difference between a C- or a D.
6.If the class really is too tough, drop it quickly. For example I majored in Psychology but decided to take begining Greek since I knew it was required for most Divinity grad schools. I realized that I was not doing the work & dropped the class before I got too far behind.
7.Make friends with the smartest kid in the class. Study with them, borrow their notes, get as much out of them as possible.
8.Work hard in school & class. If you don't understand, make the prof explain it to you. Make him/her repeat things You are paying his paycheck!!!!!!
9.Use Note cards to study, use menomic devices to memorize that useless info some of these profs like to test on.
10. Lastly don't worry how your peers think of you. They are not paying for your education.
I was a horrible student in HS but I worked hard in college, kept good grades, & graduated in 3 & 1/2 years.
Regards,
Secondly, seems like you have gotten a lot of advice, and most of it good, but from reading all this advice it seems like many people have this view that you are a sitting duck for a would be rapist, thief, etc. Not saying that you aren't a target, but, not everyone out there is bad. Dont be silly about your safety and you should be fine. There are many crimes committed each day, but thats just how the news reports it. There are millions of people that have nothing bad happen to them every year, something to think about, dont fall prey to the media's mentality that the whole world is evil and out to get you.
Good luck, study hard as you can tolerate it, and make sure you have a direction with your studies.[;)]
SSgt Ryan E. Roberts, USMC
I saw a bunch of idiots blow $15k a year for 3 years and then quit for some dumbarse reason with nothing to show for it.
By the way what are you studying & what's tuition these days?
Regards,
Then I'd go to page two....
Focus on why you are going to school. If it's to learn so as to be a success in your chosen field, then let that dictate your actions. If your going just because, well then what does any of this matter? I hope you're going to learn.
If you have one shot...Accu-Shot Website
Big Daddy my heros have always been cowboys,they still are it seems
Get laid occasionally, but only during your free time.
Clouder..
Seriously, be carefull, make your goals academic, watch the world around you, and choose your friends wisely.Don't listen to clouder about getting laid, he must not have a Daughter[G]-Call Dad everyday. Bob
Gun control is a steady hand
"You cannot conquer America." -William Pitt, 1777
What muerto monkey says is true.
I am a musician and we have nothing to recommend us.
Oh other than being the SEXIEST men on earth Hah![:p][:p][:p][:p][:p]
But seriously my advice is:
1. MOVE HOME
2. SAVE FOR A DEPOSIT
3. GET YOUR OWN APARTMENT WITH AT LEAST TWO BEDROOMS
4. GET A FLATMATE IN TO HELP YOU OFFSET THE MORTGAGE
5. OWN YOUR OWN HOME AT 30
It's hard but it's what I did and then you can afford all the stuff you want.
Cheers!
SEMPER FI
They will pay for the calls if the money is tight.
Can you guess I'm a father - and that I did not call several times when I should have.
The only thing else is - Call your Grandmother/Grandfather every month. This is not a request - this is an obligation.....[:D]
IF YOU DON'T LIKE MY RIGHTS - GET OUT OF MY COUNTRY (this includes politicians)
In other words get your education but don't sacrafice the values with which you've been brought up to please peers or professors.
Good Luck & God Bless
"Save the Whalers, they need jobs too."
I know that I shouldn't walk anywhere alone at night. My roommate escaped from a man that tried to abduct her last year while she was walking on campus alone. But she knows tae-kwan-do so she luckily got away. I know self-defense so I have a chance, but don't plan on risking it. Sodbuster, I do have really pretty eyes, so guys have to use a line that's a bit more original to sucker me in, cuz they aren't telling me something I don't already know. And I have already dated a musican, and i have no ill thoughts about him or our relationship, so I must've gotten lucky. And my roommate and I don't plan on getting a home phone installed, we are both just keeping our cell phones because it is cheaper for us. we already have a whole shelf in our cabinet for ramen. Although I'm a good cook (thanks to th women in my family), so I can always come up with a way to "spice" up a pack of ramen. But she's convinced that she will never have to eat ramen because I am going to quote " be cookin up some damn good soul food!" I learned my freshman year that I missed my crazy family so much. I call them all the time, we are very close.
I agree, Clouder mustn't have any daughters. I don't know a single father on earth that would give that piece of advice. Although it was damn good advice... Kidding, only kidding. All the alcohol advice was good. But I am only 19 so I would never drink [;)][:p]
Well thank you for all the advice. Some of it was very funny, but mostly very wise. Thank you
I love myself and so should you!
For my part, you are very welcome. Drop in every so often and let us know how you are doing in school.
redcedars
You are wrong. I've got a daughter who's old enough to be your mother and a grandson older than you are. Both are really good people. The only mistakes I'll admit to with the daughter was pounding away incessantly about the absolute law of chastity and not letting her fail financially in her younger years.
My advice stands, work hard and play responsibly.
Do well.
Clouder..
Big Daddy my heros have always been cowboys,they still are it seems