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Late for school. Good excuse?
pickenup
Member Posts: 22,844 ✭✭✭✭
"Late again," the third grade teacher said to Little Johnny. "It ain't my fault. Miss Crabtree, You can blame this one on my Dad. The reason I'm three hours late? Well, it is because Dad sleeps nights in the raw."
Now Miss Crabtree had taught grammar school for thirty-some-odd years. And she just knew that she had heard bout every excuse known to man. So she asked Little Johnny what he meant by that, despite her mounting fears. Full of grins and mischief, and in the flower of his youth, Little Johnny and Trouble were old friends, but he always told the truth.
"You see, Miss Crabtree, at the ranch we got this here low-down coyote. The last few nights he done et six hens and killed Ma's best milk goat. And last night when Dad heard a noise out in the chicken pen, he grabbed his old double barrel shotgun and said to Ma, "That coyote's back again, n' I'm gonna * im!"
"Stay back" he yelled to all us kids. "I wouldn't want ya ta * hurt!" He was naked as a jaybird, no boots, no pants, no shirt. To the henhouse he crawled, just like an * on the snoop. Well he stood up fur-nuff to stuck that old double barrel through the window of the henhouse. He stared into that dark henhouse, with coyotes on his mind.
In the mean time old hound dog Zeke had done woke up and come a sneakin' up behind Dad. Well ya can't blame old Zeke that it was a little chilly outside. He was just wonderin' what in the world was goin' on, that time of the morning'. He was bein' real quite as to not disturb Dad, but as dog will do, without any kind of warnin', he cold-nose Dad from be-hind.
Miss Crabtree, we ain't a family ta waste things, we been cleanin' chickens since three o'clock dis mornin'.
The gene pool needs chlorine.
Now Miss Crabtree had taught grammar school for thirty-some-odd years. And she just knew that she had heard bout every excuse known to man. So she asked Little Johnny what he meant by that, despite her mounting fears. Full of grins and mischief, and in the flower of his youth, Little Johnny and Trouble were old friends, but he always told the truth.
"You see, Miss Crabtree, at the ranch we got this here low-down coyote. The last few nights he done et six hens and killed Ma's best milk goat. And last night when Dad heard a noise out in the chicken pen, he grabbed his old double barrel shotgun and said to Ma, "That coyote's back again, n' I'm gonna * im!"
"Stay back" he yelled to all us kids. "I wouldn't want ya ta * hurt!" He was naked as a jaybird, no boots, no pants, no shirt. To the henhouse he crawled, just like an * on the snoop. Well he stood up fur-nuff to stuck that old double barrel through the window of the henhouse. He stared into that dark henhouse, with coyotes on his mind.
In the mean time old hound dog Zeke had done woke up and come a sneakin' up behind Dad. Well ya can't blame old Zeke that it was a little chilly outside. He was just wonderin' what in the world was goin' on, that time of the morning'. He was bein' real quite as to not disturb Dad, but as dog will do, without any kind of warnin', he cold-nose Dad from be-hind.
Miss Crabtree, we ain't a family ta waste things, we been cleanin' chickens since three o'clock dis mornin'.
The gene pool needs chlorine.
Comments
Get the job done and come home safe guys.
I rush in where others flee.
Thanks,
BW
IT'S WHAT PEOPLE KNOW ABOUT THEMSELVES THAT MAKES THEM AFRAID.
Thanks Pickenup!
James
Whats next? A ban on automatic transmissions?