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Help me with a "discussion" with the female unit!

Big Sky RedneckBig Sky Redneck Member Posts: 19,752 ✭✭✭
edited March 2015 in General Discussion
In April her brother graduates basic training at Ft Sill,OK. Her and her mother have plans to fly down for the graduation and they want to take the baby.

I offered to take that weekend off to stay with baby Pattycakes, some quality bonding time for us! [:D]

She wants to take the baby with her to the graduation, I want the baby to stay home with me.

My arguments as to why the baby needs to stay with me are not working, too much commotion, noise, weather and flying. I need help convincing her that Daddy needs this time with the baby! Mommy is being stubborn!
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Comments

  • gearheaddadgearheaddad Member Posts: 15,091 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Maybe Mommy and Grandma wants/needs to show her baby off to her Brother/Son.
    Pick another time for bonding.[;)]
    This, from Ed's school of happy marriages. 30 years!
    Congratulations on his graduation.
  • Sam06Sam06 Member Posts: 21,244 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by gearheaddad
    Maybe Mommy and Grandma wants/needs to show her baby off to her Brother/Son.
    Pick another time for bonding.[;)]
    This, from Ed's school of happy marriages. 30 years!
    Congratulations on his graduation.


    I agree, they have made up their mind and there is no changing it, all the arguments in the world will not change their mind you can use rational reasons and emotional ones and neither will work.

    I think flying with a baby would be right up there with getting a root canal, but if they want to take her she is going.
    RLTW

  • JimmyJackJimmyJack Member Posts: 5,516 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Graduate basic training is about as eventful as getting a tooth crowned!
  • ChrisInTempeChrisInTempe Member Posts: 15,562
    edited November -1
    Sympathies here from a guy who traveled for work an insane amount for some years. Wish I could tell ya' there's a WIN in this for you somehow, but there ain't. It really is a game where the only way to win is not to play.

    Instead, tell the missus how much you miss time with the baby and long for an opportunity. Ask her to help you get it done.

    It may help to fetch an onion and be slicing it as you tell her this.

    Good Luck!
  • USN_AirdaleUSN_Airdale Member Posts: 2,987
    edited November -1
    slap her around while telling her that trip may be very dangerous to the child, my oldest son was taken on an airplane when he was one month old and his eardrums were damaged, he is now in his early 50;s and still has hearing problems.
  • woodshed87woodshed87 Member Posts: 23,478 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Not Gonna Win That one
    Unless You Take A Couple Runs that Weekend and Use the Money to Purchase a New Firearm Or 3[:o)][:o)][:o)]
    Yup Get them Home and In the Safe
    'Fore She Gits Home[^]
  • Don McManusDon McManus Member Posts: 23,695 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by JimmyJack
    Graduate basic training is about as eventful as getting a tooth crowned!


    That was my thought but I didn't want to rain on anyone's parade.
    Freedom and a submissive populace cannot co-exist.

    Brad Steele
  • WarbirdsWarbirds Member Posts: 16,943 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Take the weekend off and go on the trip with the rest of the family.
  • fishkiller41fishkiller41 Member Posts: 50,608
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by Dave W.
    Take the weekend off and go on the trip with the rest of the family.

    What Dave said.It's your only alternative.
    Unless U NEVER wanna see where that baby came from again!!![B)]
  • dreherdreher Member Posts: 8,892 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Another vote for Dave's idea. Unless you like pizzing off your wife in an unwinnable situation, either go with her to the graduation or kiss the two of them goodbye when they leave to go to the graduation. Raise to much of a stink and you wont get kissed when they leave. At least I have never heard of a woman going out the door heading for the divorce attorneys office kissing the soon to be ex-husband goodbye.

    To me this is a situation where you might win the battle but you could end up losing in the end.
  • droptopdroptop Member Posts: 8,363 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    Wife, friend, amante, boss, etc. advice:

    Go along with it,, after all,, if something goes wrong,, guess who's fault !!!

    Do it all the time,, but add, OK but if something goes wrong it's your fault
  • rambo rebelrambo rebel Member Posts: 4,028
    edited November -1
    try an end run - tell her to think how hard it will be to enjoy the graduation which is long and may be outside. if the baby starts crying she will miss the graduation or if she like so many other rude people justs let em cry thus ruining it for those around her. then suggest she ask her brother what he thinks.

    it wouldn't hurt to contact him in advance and ask him to tell sis no and that he'll be home in a day or 2 to see the baby anyway.

    my dil ruined her aunts funeral with a crying baby.

    or tell her she should think of the babies safety and quit being so selfish. after all the event is about the grads, not her need to show off a new arrival.


    OR tell her you will hire a house cleaner to come in and have the place cleaned up before she gets back and hire one of those topless services that does that.[}:)][:D]
  • ChrisInTempeChrisInTempe Member Posts: 15,562
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by Dave W.
    Take the weekend off and go on the trip with the rest of the family.


    A good plan! Not the one-on-one bonding time he wanted but likely the best option.

    Only downside I see is that onion ain't gonna' chop itself ! [:o)][:D]
  • yonsonyonson Member Posts: 951 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Presumably her mother has raised children and knows the drill - resistance is futile. My advice: put some extra cash in the wife's hand and smile and tell her to have a wonderful time. Have some fresh flowers on hand when she gets back. Works great for me, too bad it took a lifetime to figure it out. Reading the book "Men are from Mars, women from Venus" is a real eye-opener on why men & women don't speak the same language, never will. You need to find ways around it in a self-deprecating way (admit to being a jerk, etc., even when you're not). Tends to melt 'em right down. Playing hard ball don't cut it. Cheers
  • Smitty500magSmitty500mag Member Posts: 13,623 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by Big Sky Redneck
    I need help convincing her that Daddy needs this time with the baby! Mommy is being stubborn!


    You never let a woman think you want something that's just for you. You got to go with making them think it's what's best for the children.

    I mean it's only in the babies best interest to stay at home with you. You never know when someone with Ebola might be on the plane. It would selfish and a terrible shame to expose the baby to that awful disease just in order to show it off to loved ones.

    You have to go with the guilt thing it'll make them realize you're only thinking of what's best for the baby and not your selfish desires. [;)]
  • Mr. PerfectMr. Perfect Member, Moderator Posts: 66,437 ******
    edited November -1
    As an airline passenger, my absolute favorite is to have to listen to the screaming kid for 5 hours.[xx(][xx(]
    Some will die in hot pursuit
    And fiery auto crashes
    Some will die in hot pursuit
    While sifting through my ashes
    Some will fall in love with life
    And drink it from a fountain
    That is pouring like an avalanche
    Coming down the mountain
  • bpostbpost Member Posts: 32,669 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Let the ladies go do ladies stuff with baby. You can bond later when the child will actually know "daddy" is a cool dude. At this age she is just a diaper loading, breast draining crying machine and you are ill equipped to handle the feeding.
  • fishkiller41fishkiller41 Member Posts: 50,608
    edited November -1
    Smitty: Your plan would NEVER work...
    He would have to convince the wifely unit that it's all for HER! Not the child.




    Bruce:Your scenario has merit. Between you and Dave,I think their the best ideas.
    (as though it was not already predetermined by the women folk)
    JMWO...

    just my worthless opinion...
  • fishkiller41fishkiller41 Member Posts: 50,608
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by dennisnielsen
    STHU and let mama show off the baby to her friends

    you will score brownie points
    Or "pointed brownies"...Which ever comes first!
  • OakieOakie Member Posts: 40,565 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    After being married twice you have to ask us????? [:D][:D][:D]
  • Rack OpsRack Ops Member Posts: 18,596 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Its in baby's best interest to stay home, so she should stay home.

    Obviously the chances of anything truly serious happening are small, but why even take the risk? Besides, when the plane gets up to altitude and her ears get pressure in them, I can just about guarantee that baby Pattycakes will be howling.

    Bottom line: The baby isn't your wife's exclusive property to do with as she please. If you each are voting one way, whatever makes the child most comfortable is the tiebreaker. I've kept my son home with me while my wife has made several trips out of state because it wasn't in his best interest to be traveling. She wanted to take him, but understood the reasons I have wanted to keep him home.

    The only exception I can think of is if the kid is still breastfeeding and you don't have the stuff needed to bottle and freeze it while your wife is gone. Trust me, you don't want to be around if that kid gets switched to formula all at once. [:)]
  • Big Sky RedneckBig Sky Redneck Member Posts: 19,752 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Some of you are absolutely no help!! [:D]
  • toolmaniamtoolmaniam Member Posts: 3,213
    edited November -1
    I have some words for you...Good freaking luck buddy![:D]
  • SawzSawz Member Posts: 6,049
    edited November -1
    baby will keep daddy from getting into trouble
  • 1BigGuy1BigGuy Member Posts: 4,033 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    2-1. I think the odds are HEAVILY stacked against your chances of winning this one.
  • chollagardenschollagardens Member Posts: 4,614 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    It is flu season and motels are nasty. It probably won't help the argument but it may alert her to be careful.
  • CaptFunCaptFun Member Posts: 16,678 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    This time of year traveling with a very small child (especially one that I'm guessing is not in a large day care... my kids brought home every known superbug. They rarely got sick, but certainly brought it home to us....) exposes them to some rather nasty infections.
  • allen griggsallen griggs Member Posts: 35,696 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Two women want the baby
    One man wants the baby.

    You lose.
  • retroxler58retroxler58 Member Posts: 32,693 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    38 years of marriage has proven one thing to me...
    I'm never right, she's never wrong.

    Funny thing is...
    The 18 years before marriage, the same situation existed with my Mom. [B)]
  • Big Sky RedneckBig Sky Redneck Member Posts: 19,752 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    I'm making progress, all it takes is some well timed whining [:D]
  • gearheaddadgearheaddad Member Posts: 15,091 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Well, as said above offer to keep the baby so Mommy and Grandma can have fun enjoying a young soldiers graduation with no interuptions from baby?
    Make it about them and their comfort!
    I kept the kids many times when my wife traveled. I always enjoyed it!
  • rambo rebelrambo rebel Member Posts: 4,028
    edited November -1
    Put your foot down ! Are we not men??? (as I look over my shoulder to see if the wife is looking at what I type[8])
  • Queen of SwordsQueen of Swords Member Posts: 14,355
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by gearheaddad
    Well, as said above offer to keep the baby so Mommy and Grandma can have fun enjoying a young soldiers graduation with no interuptions from baby?
    Make it about them and their comfort!
    I kept the kids many times when my wife traveled. I always enjoyed it!


    Ditto on the baby's comfort during the flight, but also do some research on outlet malls in the area, if she is into shopping. She and Mom have some valuable "bonding time" themselves, have a relaxing day shopping to their heart's content, lunching, maybe a spa day. I don't know a mother with a small child who could pass that up.

    You have to put some bait on the hook.[;)]
  • wpagewpage Member Posts: 10,201 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Plan a boys nite out with big stops...

    Watch her plans for Jr change[:o)]
  • armilitearmilite Member Posts: 35,490 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    You can't win here either go with them like Dave said or let the women take the baby with them. You've got the rest of your life to bond with them.
  • sxsnufsxsnuf Member Posts: 2,952 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Nut up!
    Work that weekend and keep making payments on all those trucks.
    With the amount of consumer debt you're carrying, the economy of the mountain states relies on you!

    Even if she lets you think you've "won" the argument, you lose!
    Arrivederci gigi
  • Okie MomOkie Mom Member Posts: 1,234 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by Big Sky Redneck
    I'm making progress, all it takes is some well timed whining [:D]


    You might be winning but let me tell you as a MOM that the minute she leaves that little one and gets on the plane she will worry herself to death and be calling all the time, especially if this is her first trip away from her.
    I can easily remember, even after 40 years, the first time my husband and I just went out for the evening and left our son with some very close friends. I didn't enjoy myself that much.
    Let her take the little one and she her off to the family and then be there for a few days when she returns.
    GOOD LUCK !!
  • MG1890MG1890 Member Posts: 4,460 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    Just mention that being home alone would give you free time for girly bars.....
  • GrasshopperGrasshopper Member Posts: 17,043 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Tell her you want her to take the child,,you insist,,[:I]
  • v35v35 Member Posts: 12,710 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Screaming babies are one of the delights of commercial flights.
    The probability of catching respiratory infections on long flights is high and a good reason to leave the child behind.
    That risk is a good but probably ineffective argument.
    Our daughter in law wouldn't let my son visit us with our grandson.
    Reason? There doesn't have to be a reason.
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