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Nuther reason I hate doctors!
dheffley
Member Posts: 25,000 ✭
This is just another reason I hate to get anywhere near one.
Was up at the hospital visiting Sandy. They had called a dermatologist because she had a rash, and they just wanted to make sure it was a small reaction to the antibiotics, and not something else.
He came in while I was there, and gave her a clean bill of health so she could get released tomorrow. As we shook hands to say goodbye, he asked me to let him look at a spot on my right arm, so I did.
He asked me a few questions, which I answered as honestly as I could, and he told me I needed to come see him in his office first thing in the morning.
I told him I couldn't because I had to work and I had to come pick Sandy up in the afternoon. He said for me to make time, no matter what.
Now, this guy does not know my history, and he doesn't know how upset Sandy gets if you use the "C" word and my name in the same sentence.
He said, "That's melanoma, the worst kind of cancer there is, and that is bad and looks like it's deep. It needs to be treated first thing in the morning, no matter what."
Well, great! Sandy's now bawling over a spot on my arm, and all because this guy just had to talk in front of her.[:(!]
I promised him and Sandy I would be there first thing in the morning. I guess I should have known something was wrong. It would heal up until I bumped it, then it would start bleeding again. Didn't hurt, just never got completely healed. I thought it was because of the diabetis.[xx(]
Crap! Now she'll be on my butt about everything again![V]
Was up at the hospital visiting Sandy. They had called a dermatologist because she had a rash, and they just wanted to make sure it was a small reaction to the antibiotics, and not something else.
He came in while I was there, and gave her a clean bill of health so she could get released tomorrow. As we shook hands to say goodbye, he asked me to let him look at a spot on my right arm, so I did.
He asked me a few questions, which I answered as honestly as I could, and he told me I needed to come see him in his office first thing in the morning.
I told him I couldn't because I had to work and I had to come pick Sandy up in the afternoon. He said for me to make time, no matter what.
Now, this guy does not know my history, and he doesn't know how upset Sandy gets if you use the "C" word and my name in the same sentence.
He said, "That's melanoma, the worst kind of cancer there is, and that is bad and looks like it's deep. It needs to be treated first thing in the morning, no matter what."
Well, great! Sandy's now bawling over a spot on my arm, and all because this guy just had to talk in front of her.[:(!]
I promised him and Sandy I would be there first thing in the morning. I guess I should have known something was wrong. It would heal up until I bumped it, then it would start bleeding again. Didn't hurt, just never got completely healed. I thought it was because of the diabetis.[xx(]
Crap! Now she'll be on my butt about everything again![V]
Comments
The doc may have just saved your life. Good luck with it, and best to Sandy too.
I'll be appreciative, but I'm going to have to tell him to never, and I mean never, say the "C" word where she can hear it again. I know with my history, cancer will most likely be what takes me out, but I don't want to hear it until she has to.
What Eric said!
Thanks all, but I'm not too worried about it. If they need to take the arm off, I would rather them do that than tell her I have cancer anywhere on or in me![V]
Re-frame the situation. He may have just saved your life. For free! Didn't have to say anything. A lot of people (especially men) might decide the next day to blow it all off, so he made sure that would not happen.
Good luck in the morning!
I'm glad he did, but I have fought colon cancer, gall bladder cancer, and stomach cancer for the last few years, and the mention of the word sends my wife into hysteria. I know he wasn't aware of it, but I wish he had asked me to step in the hall before he said it.
If you can't feel the music; it's only pink noise!
hopefully nothing a little slice and a few high-energy electrons can't cure [;)]
As far as cancers go it could be a helluva lot worse [:(]
I'm studying the little devils right now and am scared to death of cancer
Heff, now you'll probably be mad if the doc is wrong...get it checked out..
He was sure of it, and I came home and researched skin cancer on the web, and I'm pretty sure it is too. It looks and acts exactly as they had shown in their pictures and paragraphs.[xx(]
Oh well, I spent my fair skined life in the sun and was sunburned at the beginning of every summer, so I guess it's time to pay the piper.[V]
We'll see what they do in the morning.
Take 20 minutes before you go in and search your body for any other spots. I met a guy who spent most of his working life in the sun. He'd go in to the doctor every few months and get another few melanomas removed. They're no big deal if you catch them in time. Like he said....let them go and you're in BIG trouble.
We were taught medicine is 49% science, and 51% art.
Wish for you a clean bill of health.
R/
Dr D.
And that makes him a jerk?
I'm sorry to hear that you probably have cancer. I am sorry to hear that your wife is going to go bananas and be hysterical and all the rest of it. But please DO NOT give this doctor a hard time because you were too rockheaded to realize that when a doctor says that you need to come see him first thing in the morning, it's usually very, very serious and you need to come see him first thing in the morning. If you do give him a hard time, the next time he sees some random person who probably has a severe medical problem, he may just decide--as is his right--to do nothing. And that random person will go undiagnosed and untreated.
Again, I'm sorry you're probably sick, but you need to thank this good doctor, not criticize him. And you need to get your wife some help to deal with this.
Thank the Doctor for pointing out to you that you have melanoma. Tell him you are going to return the favor by letting him know his bedside manner is flawed because he discussed your condition in front of Sandy and stressed her while she is sick. Also point out that if you were litigious he could be sued for breach patient confidiality because he discussed your private medical history in front of Sandy. Find another doctor and get it checked out immediately.
Some medical doctors get into a way of thinking of people as children or animals. The doctor you saw did not think it important to keep Sandy from anxiety. He did not keep your personal info private. You said "He said for me to make time, no matter what." To some the way he said it dosn't matter but to others it does. It is still your decision if you want to be treated or not. You are not a child to be told "make time, no matter what." You are still in control of your life, keep control by not allowing anyone else any control.
JMHO
Take care.
So this doctor who's not even treating you notices something on your arm. He tells you to come see him first thing in the morning. Nothing else, just come see him first thing in the morning. You say no way, you can't do that. So he says that you need to come see him first thing in the morning because it looks like cancer.
And that makes him a jerk?
No, I never said he was a jerk, and he's not. I said he didn't know my history, and he didn't know what the word CANCER was going to do to Sandy after what I've been through the last few years.
I appreciate what he did, I just wish he had talked to me in private about the "C" word, and he should have.
No good deed goes unpunished. Often, when someone saves your life (which may be the case here) they don't stop to think how to be perfect about doing it.
It was how it was presented in front of Sandy while she was sick and him not knowing the history of me and cancer, and how she was going to react.
I appreciate him, but he should have discussed anything about me and my health in private.
You guys took everything I said wrong. The man cared, and was doing me a service, but as a doctor, he should have made the conversation private. I doubt he would have blurted out that he thought I had an STD in front of my wife.
This post is not going to be popular.
Thank the Doctor for pointing out to you that you have melanoma. Tell him you are going to return the favor by letting him know his bedside manner is flawed because he discussed your condition in front of Sandy and stressed her while she is sick. Also point out that if you were litigious he could be sued for breach patient confidiality because he discussed your private medical history in front of Sandy. Find another doctor and get it checked out immediately.
Some medical doctors get into a way of thinking of people as children or animals. The doctor you saw did not think it important to keep Sandy from anxiety. He did not keep your personal info private. You said "He said for me to make time, no matter what." To some the way he said it dosn't matter but to others it does. It is still your decision if you want to be treated or not. You are not a child to be told "make time, no matter what." You are still in control of your life, keep control by not allowing anyone else any control.
We had that discussion this morning, and he agreed.
And that makes him a jerk?
I'm sorry to hear that you probably have cancer. I am sorry to hear that your wife is going to go bananas and be hysterical and all the rest of it. But please DO NOT give this doctor a hard time because you were too rockheaded to realize that when a doctor says that you need to come see him first thing in the morning, it's usually very, very serious and you need to come see him first thing in the morning. If you do give him a hard time, the next time he sees some random person who probably has a severe medical problem, he may just decide--as is his right--to do nothing. And that random person will go undiagnosed and untreated.
Again, I'm sorry you're probably sick, but you need to thank this good doctor, not criticize him. And you need to get your wife some help to deal with this."
Well said mlincoln.
"So this doctor who's not even treating you notices something on your arm. He tells you to come see him first thing in the morning. Nothing else, just come see him first thing in the morning. You say no way, you can't do that. So he says that you need to come see him first thing in the morning because it looks like cancer.
And that makes him a jerk?
I'm sorry to hear that you probably have cancer. I am sorry to hear that your wife is going to go bananas and be hysterical and all the rest of it. But please DO NOT give this doctor a hard time because you were too rockheaded to realize that when a doctor says that you need to come see him first thing in the morning, it's usually very, very serious and you need to come see him first thing in the morning. If you do give him a hard time, the next time he sees some random person who probably has a severe medical problem, he may just decide--as is his right--to do nothing. And that random person will go undiagnosed and untreated.
Again, I'm sorry you're probably sick, but you need to thank this good doctor, not criticize him. And you need to get your wife some help to deal with this."
Well said mlincoln.
I never said he was a jerk.
This post is not going to be popular.
Thank the Doctor for pointing out to you that you have melanoma. Tell him you are going to return the favor by letting him know his bedside manner is flawed because he discussed your condition in front of Sandy and stressed her while she is sick. Also point out that if you were litigious he could be sued for breach patient confidiality because he discussed your private medical history in front of Sandy. Find another doctor and get it checked out immediately.
While I agree this probably could have been handled by the physician better, since dheffley wasn't this doctors patient at the time of his observation, HIPAA doesn't apply.
Merely speculating about a possible diagnosis isn't a breach of someone's history or medical records. Again, HIPAA doesn't apply.
Apart from HIPPA, unless dheffley were likely to try to conceal this diagnosis from his wife, there weren't really damages. In other words, if he would have told her about it anyway, confidentiality wasn't really breached.
He can sue all day, but he'd probably never see a thin dime from this case.
Lastly, even disregarding everything above, a jury would be pretty unlikely to award damages in a case like this, where a physician essentially went out of his way to diagnose and potentially save the life of a non-patient.
It was how it was presented in front of Sandy while she was sick and him not knowing the history of me and cancer, and how she was going to react.
I appreciate him, but he should have discussed anything about me and my health in private.
You guys took everything I said wrong. The man cared, and was doing me a service, but as a doctor, he should have made the conversation private. I doubt he would have blurted out that he thought I had an STD in front of my wife.
Per your own description he tried to do it in private in his office, citing urgency, and you made excuses about not wanting to show up.
Again, maybe he should have asked you to step into the hall, but was that a private area? You may hate doctors, but in the grand scheme of things, this doctor potentially did you a *HUGE* favor.
How upset would your wife be if you never followed up with an appointment with this guy and developed metastatic melanoma?
Anyway, here's to hoping the tumor isn't a melanoma, and if it is, its a thin one.