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Oldie but goodie
dheffley
Member Posts: 25,000 ✭
A contestant on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" had reached the final plateau. If she answered the next question correctly, she would win $1,000,000. And as she suspected, the million-dollar question was no pushover.
It was, "Which of the following species of birds does not build its own nest, but instead lays its eggs in the nests of other birds? Is it A) the condor;
the buzzard; C) the cuckoo; or (D) the vulture?"
The woman was on the spot. She did not know the answer. And she was doubly on the spot because she had used up her 50/50 Lifeline and her Audience Poll Lifeline.
All that remained was her Phone-a-Friend Lifeline. The woman hoped she would not have to use it because ... her friend was, well, blonde. She had no alternative.
She called her friend and gave her the question and the four choices. The blonde responded hesitatingly: "That's easy. The answer is C: The cuckoo."
The contestant had to make a decision and make it fast. She considered employing a reverse strategy and giving Regis any answer except the one that her friend had given her. And considering that her friend was a blonde, that would seem to be the logical thing to do.
On the other hand - the blonde had responded with such confidence, such certitude, that the contestant could not help but be persuaded.
"I need an answer," said Regis.
Crossing her fingers, the contestant said, "C: The cuckoo."
"Is that your final answer?" asked Regis.
"Yes, that is my final answer."
And after a big buildup, Regis said, "That answer is .... absolutely correct!! You are now a millionaire!"
Three day s later, the contestant hosted a party for her family and friends including the blonde who had helped her win the million dollars.
"Jenny, I just do not know how to thank you," said the contestant.
"How did you happen to know the right answer?"
"Oh, come on," said the blonde. "Everybody knows that cuckoos don't build nests. They live in clocks." [:o)][:o)]
It was, "Which of the following species of birds does not build its own nest, but instead lays its eggs in the nests of other birds? Is it A) the condor;
the buzzard; C) the cuckoo; or (D) the vulture?"The woman was on the spot. She did not know the answer. And she was doubly on the spot because she had used up her 50/50 Lifeline and her Audience Poll Lifeline.
All that remained was her Phone-a-Friend Lifeline. The woman hoped she would not have to use it because ... her friend was, well, blonde. She had no alternative.
She called her friend and gave her the question and the four choices. The blonde responded hesitatingly: "That's easy. The answer is C: The cuckoo."
The contestant had to make a decision and make it fast. She considered employing a reverse strategy and giving Regis any answer except the one that her friend had given her. And considering that her friend was a blonde, that would seem to be the logical thing to do.
On the other hand - the blonde had responded with such confidence, such certitude, that the contestant could not help but be persuaded.
"I need an answer," said Regis.
Crossing her fingers, the contestant said, "C: The cuckoo."
"Is that your final answer?" asked Regis.
"Yes, that is my final answer."
And after a big buildup, Regis said, "That answer is .... absolutely correct!! You are now a millionaire!"
Three day s later, the contestant hosted a party for her family and friends including the blonde who had helped her win the million dollars.
"Jenny, I just do not know how to thank you," said the contestant.
"How did you happen to know the right answer?"
"Oh, come on," said the blonde. "Everybody knows that cuckoos don't build nests. They live in clocks." [:o)][:o)]
Comments
1. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.
2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in Texas.
3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in Texas, plus a couple no one's seen before.
4. If it grows, it'll stick ya... If it crawls, it'll bite cha.
5. 'Onced' and 'Twiced' are words.
6. It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy!
7. 'Jawl-P?' means 'Did ya'll go to the bathroom?'
8. People actually grow and eat okra.
9. 'Fixinto' is one word.
10. There is no such thing as 'dinner'. There is breakfast, lunch and supper.
11. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar.
12. Backwards and forwards means 'I know everything about you.'
13. The word 'jeet' is actually a phrase meaning 'Did you eat?'
14. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is, you work until you're done or it's too dark to see.
15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH EM.
16. 'No. Jew?' is a common response to the question 'Did you bring any beer?'
17. You measure distance in minutes - e.g. 'it's down yonder about 3 minutes past that fillin station'.
18. You switch from heat to A/C in the same day.
19. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.
20. You know what a 'DAWG' is.
21. You carry jumper cables in your car --- for your OWN car.
22. You only own five spices: salt, pepper, Tony's, Tabasco and Ketchup.
23. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports and motor sports, and gossip.
24. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
25. You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit 'a bit warm'.
26. You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas.
27. Going toWal-Mart is a favorite past time know as 'goin' Wal-Martin' or 'off to Wally World'.
28. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chicken stew weather.
29. Fried catfish is the other white meat.
30. We don't need no dang driver's Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive dag-nabbit.
31. You understand these jokes and forward them to your Texas friends and those who just wish they were from Texas .
I changed your roach oen a bit.
I would also add one more spice to that list (Chili Powder).
32. There are 56 species of roaches found in the US. 52 of them are found only in Harris County Texas.
33. Bum Phillips is a hero, but Tom Landry was a God!
34. WD-40 is good for removing dried road tar from your truck.
35. Crawl-fish are not bait, their breakfast, lunch or supper.
Trinity +++
Enjoyed it. Thanks.