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Speaking of lies...
NiccoHel
Member Posts: 1,519 ✭✭✭✭✭
Alright, this is out of nowhere, I know, but I feel like sharing.
So, I know this guy. He isn't related to me (thankfully!), but he is "attached" to the family. Long story short, his missus was my aunt's "roommate" (suspected benefits).
I haven't spoken to him for a long while, but I was reminded of his exploits recently.
Let's see... he has always been a boisterous man. He has claimed, in many a recounting, his numerous occasions of heroics and general awesomeness. Let me list a few for you all:
1. He enlisted into the Army at the age of 16 with a fake ID.
2. He is a black belt in ninjitsu.
3. He was a firefighter.
4. He has a doctorate... in an undisclosed field.
5. He once flew a plane in an emergency, which prompted him to obtain an actual pilot's license. Consequently, he so thoroughly impressed his instructor that he received his license after half the required hours.
6. He once bedded a movie star, but is a man of honor, and therefore will not reveal her name.
7. He won numerous awards for his chili at numerous chili cook-offs in New Mexico and Texas.
8. He once won a Purple Heart in-action in Vietnam saving the lives of Navy SEALs, but due to the covert nature of the mission, is not allowed to display said medal, nor avow any acknowledgement of service. (See item #1)
9. He once fired a firework of his own construction that so thoroughly impressed a professional firework manufacturer, that the mfgr had to know the method and has since gone on to great success around the world for his pyrotechnic displays.
10. He once ended a high speed police pursuit by ramming the suspect's vehicle off the road, then tackled the fleeing offender, earning him a merit award by the mayor of the city.
11. He once considered joining NASA, but didn't really trust the agency. Hence, his life was saved as the Challenger exploded on the mission he may have been on.
12. He once got into a bar fight against multiple members of the Hell's Angels, but due to his training (see item #2), he managed to single-handedly defeated his 6 opponents. (Or 8? The story changes depending on the time of night.) If it is especially later in the evening, 3 Hell's Angels riders ended up in the hospital. Depending on how much alcohol has been consumed, one of those riders is only alive because he felt sorry for so roundly kicking the guy's * that he performed life-saving first aid in the bar.
13. He is an honorary member of the Hell's Angels despite not being a motorcyclist due to his *-kicking skills, and for saving the life of a Hell's Angel.
14. He is the youngest un-official Green Beret ever. On record. If there was a record. Which there isn't due to government secret classification laws.
15. Yadda yadda yadda.
Now, at this point, I would expect most of you would be raising the BS flag right about now, but he swears it is all true!
I don't quite understand how someone his age (and considerable weight), could have possibly achieved this much in his life. Especially since he was about 13 in 1970.
Alas, I can only aspire to such greatness.
Anyone else know anybody as awesome as this guy?
So, I know this guy. He isn't related to me (thankfully!), but he is "attached" to the family. Long story short, his missus was my aunt's "roommate" (suspected benefits).
I haven't spoken to him for a long while, but I was reminded of his exploits recently.
Let's see... he has always been a boisterous man. He has claimed, in many a recounting, his numerous occasions of heroics and general awesomeness. Let me list a few for you all:
1. He enlisted into the Army at the age of 16 with a fake ID.
2. He is a black belt in ninjitsu.
3. He was a firefighter.
4. He has a doctorate... in an undisclosed field.
5. He once flew a plane in an emergency, which prompted him to obtain an actual pilot's license. Consequently, he so thoroughly impressed his instructor that he received his license after half the required hours.
6. He once bedded a movie star, but is a man of honor, and therefore will not reveal her name.
7. He won numerous awards for his chili at numerous chili cook-offs in New Mexico and Texas.
8. He once won a Purple Heart in-action in Vietnam saving the lives of Navy SEALs, but due to the covert nature of the mission, is not allowed to display said medal, nor avow any acknowledgement of service. (See item #1)
9. He once fired a firework of his own construction that so thoroughly impressed a professional firework manufacturer, that the mfgr had to know the method and has since gone on to great success around the world for his pyrotechnic displays.
10. He once ended a high speed police pursuit by ramming the suspect's vehicle off the road, then tackled the fleeing offender, earning him a merit award by the mayor of the city.
11. He once considered joining NASA, but didn't really trust the agency. Hence, his life was saved as the Challenger exploded on the mission he may have been on.
12. He once got into a bar fight against multiple members of the Hell's Angels, but due to his training (see item #2), he managed to single-handedly defeated his 6 opponents. (Or 8? The story changes depending on the time of night.) If it is especially later in the evening, 3 Hell's Angels riders ended up in the hospital. Depending on how much alcohol has been consumed, one of those riders is only alive because he felt sorry for so roundly kicking the guy's * that he performed life-saving first aid in the bar.
13. He is an honorary member of the Hell's Angels despite not being a motorcyclist due to his *-kicking skills, and for saving the life of a Hell's Angel.
14. He is the youngest un-official Green Beret ever. On record. If there was a record. Which there isn't due to government secret classification laws.
15. Yadda yadda yadda.
Now, at this point, I would expect most of you would be raising the BS flag right about now, but he swears it is all true!
I don't quite understand how someone his age (and considerable weight), could have possibly achieved this much in his life. Especially since he was about 13 in 1970.
Alas, I can only aspire to such greatness.
Anyone else know anybody as awesome as this guy?
Comments
Just the other day I hired a guy to do some odd jobs around the place (Mow the grass, weedeat, and pick up anthing that didnt belong on the ground (we have people that will walk the street and throw bottles and cans into other peoples yards) Anyway, the guy seemed like a regular Joe so I ask him if he liked to shoot, "Shoot what" was his reply,,We were standing next to my reloading shop and I pointed in and said "you know, rifles, pistols , and shotguns, Next thing out of his mouth was, "Yeah! I am a sniper" , I said "Really?" , What kinda gun did you use? He then sort of went quiet and I ask again, his answer "I dont remember the model . I just walked off shaking my head.
There is a mental disorder, Munchausen disease. People with this disorder concoct wild, unbelievable stories, often involving narrow escapes from certain death.
When he drinks beer, does he prefer Dos Equis?
Upon reflection, it would appear that way. However, all of these daring-do adventures were aired prior to the celebrity of "The Most Interesting Man".
I just have to add, this kind of guy sickens me. It is one thing to exaggerate a story, and another to make-up such outrageous fabrications.
If he had said that he had saved a kitten from a burning building, I wouldn't consider giving him a hard time. Instead he had to build himself up to such incredible stature that he is laughable.
Everyone adds an inch, fishing or otherwise, but his crap just goes so far. I swear, if you met this guy, you would just nod your head and give him attaboys as he is just so pathetic. It is like he is retarded and has just pooped his onesy while playing-acting as Superman.
I will let schnit slide to a degree, but then I just can't help laughing out loud. I met this dude one time that claimed to be a professional bodyguard. All hundred-thirty pounds of him. 1st-class celebrity jobs and all. I think the most professional service the guy had seen was as an apprentice to a meth chef, but I humored him. At least he didn't claim to be a super-ninja though, you know?
You have to video tape this guy for us. Buy him a twelve pack and have at it. [:D]
You don't get enough of that right here?[:(]
quote:Originally posted by Sav99
You have to video tape this guy for us. Buy him a twelve pack and have at it. [:D]
You don't get enough of that right here?[:(]
Good point. I retract my suggestion. [;)][:p]
The guy sounds like my brother in law
Sounds more like a few GB Forum Advanced Members !! [;)][:D][:D]
quote:Originally posted by soop
The guy sounds like my brother in law
Sounds more like a few GB Forum Advanced Members !! [;)][:D][:D]
Yeah, I didn't know you knew Select Fire!
http://youtu.be/pCwLsXZnFl4
...[;)]
When he drinks beer, does he prefer Dos Equis?
[:D] [:D] [:D]
Years ago I was once a metal god of a rock star. I hung out with the likes of Steve Harris, Jeff Hannemen, KK Downing all of major metal acts.
I was a? Bass player ya that's it. I was good, totally pro level player. I was on the radio, TV. IN the papers, Booked playing in foreign countries, ya a real international rock star. There were groupies, beer and drugs (tho I never messed with the drugs).
We were booked opening for big time acts like Megadeth, Sprung monkey, Psychotic Waltz, And we were offered the opening spot with DEATH but turned it down.
I was a rock god for just over ten years. My old band is still on the internet. I knew guys who went on to play with the likes of Ripper Owens. My friends were on MTV all the time.
Oh my records? Well we never had a deal but we were offered one but turned it down! We wanted to waite for a better deal. Record companies did come around sniffing though. Really!
Ya I was a rock god. All true of course. I could still live off music if I wanted to but I choose to work for a living. Really! [:p]
When he drinks beer, does he prefer Dos Equis?
There is a mental disorder, Munchausen disease. People with this disorder concoct wild, unbelievable stories, often involving narrow escapes from certain death.
"When in Rome, do they do as he does?"[:)]
Sounds like a genuine case of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) where magnificent individuals such as he, have grandiose accomplishments that make everyone else substandard. Yes, I know this because this guy sounds like an in-law of mine.
At this sight for bunches of stolen Valor Characters.
Ask him what was the name of the country during his RS training ?
What was the name of the currency used there ?
Finally, ask him what a "one time pass" is.
Will be interesting to hear what his answers are.....
14. He is the youngest un-official Green Beret ever. On record. If there was a record. Which there isn't due to government secret classification laws.
Ask him what was the name of the country during his RS training ?
What was the name of the currency used there ?
Finally, ask him what a "one time pass" is.
Will be interesting to hear what his answers are.....
LOL, man, I would, but I haven't spoken to him in a long while. I'm sure if I asked where he trained he'd clam up on account of opsec, that he originated the currency idea but it was changed after he left, that he wouldn't accept a "one time pass" 'cuz it sounds like taking a break, etc.
His eyes are brown from all the s--- in his brains. In his mind, the Most Interesting Man in the World commercials are about him.
This guy really is one of those * bags that would hear your story of a 20lb sea bass and would then counter with a 220lb thresher shark, on light tackle, at night, in a kayak. He's the kind of guy that doesn't claim that he had to walk through blizzards to get to school, because his school was in a blizzard.
What amazed me most was that his wife would just sit and smile while he blatantly lied to "family" and friends.
quote:Originally posted by drl50
"When in Rome, do they do as he does?"
Sounds like a genuine case of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) where magnificent individuals such as he, have grandiose accomplishments that make everyone else substandard. Yes, I know this because this guy sounds like an in-law of mine.
That is the common consensus on his diagnosis. We've unofficially nicknamed him "Carlos the Jack-Off" on account of all the mystery and danger.
well, not really, but Kudo's for even knowing it was a psyche disorder!!
M?nchausen syndrome is a term for psychiatric disorders known as factitious disorders wherein those affected feign disease, illness, or psychological trauma in order to draw attention or sympathy to themselves. It is also sometimes known as hospital addiction syndrome or hospital hopper syndrome. Nurses sometimes refer to them as frequent flyers, because they return to the hospital just like frequent flyers return to the airport. However, there is discussion to reclassify them as somatoform disorder in the DSM-5 as it is unclear whether or not people are conscious of drawing attention to themselves.
M?nchausen syndrome is related to M?nchausen syndrome by proxy, which refers to the abuse of another being, typically a child, in order to seek attention or sympathy for the abuser.
Only problem is that the guy is 5 years younger than Johnny ,and 68 was Johnny's senior year .
I don't try to correct people : it is too much fun listening to them ![;)]
One cannot cut the required hours short... 40 as I recall. While you can solo before that as your instructor sees fit, the certificate cannot be issued before the required time.
And fiery auto crashes
Some will die in hot pursuit
While sifting through my ashes
Some will fall in love with life
And drink it from a fountain
That is pouring like an avalanche
Coming down the mountain
Those would not be the right answers and OPSEC claims would be a cop out. These questions bust wannabees all the time, who were on covert operations where the records are classified. (not).
The country is a mythical one right here in the US.
The currency is used in said mythical country for various reasons (and he should know what the various reasons are)
A one time pass is something used in radio operations.
He is the one who claims he runs water for fuel. He ran out of gas on the way to work. Then claimed he did it on purpose. Just seeing how far he could go. But was not carrying and fuel so had to hitch a ride and was late.
Claimed to have killed a coyote at 30 yards once.
With a throwing knife.
I did get him to shut up once. Pardon if it's a repost, but I love re-living the look on his face. He was about midway through one of his fantastic stories once when I'd had enough. I just stood up and said, "Look at the time. I have to get home to spend time with my daughter. I've heard that if you take your shirt off and hold your naked child to your bare chest, it really bonds you to the child, so I'm going to do that."
"Cool." He says. "How old is she?"
I look him in the eye and say, "Seventeen."
He was actually speechless long enough for me to get out the door.
OP sounds just like a guy I knew a few years ago. His instinctive reaction to anything you said was, "That's nothing, I..."
Claimed to have killed a coyote at 30 yards once.
With a throwing knife.
I did get him to shut up once. Pardon if it's a repost, but I love re-living the look on his face. He was about midway through one of his fantastic stories once when I'd had enough. I just stood up and said, "Look at the time. I have to get home to spend time with my daughter. I've heard that if you take your shirt off and hold your naked child to your bare chest, it really bonds you to the child, so I'm going to do that."
"Cool." He says. "How old is she?"
I look him in the eye and say, "Seventeen."
He was actually speechless long enough for me to get out the door.
LOL, NIIICE! Kinda pervy, but still a good one.
Yeah, I have run into a few people that have that "greater-than" problem. A guy I worked with in the service had been a Sea-Bee before changing rates to AO. He was a short guy, kinda looked like Michael Dudikoff (American Ninja. Anybody?), so he had to be tougher/cooler than everyone else to feel secure.
So, we were sitting in a bar in Australia one night, on shore leave, and he is explaining that he "doesn't know why, but chicks just love" him, and all that. To prove it he turns to a young lady that had stepped up to the bar and gave some pick-up line to which she promptly sneered, gave a terse comment, and walked away. [:D]
When he drinks beer, does he prefer Dos Equis?
There is a mental disorder, Munchausen disease. People with this disorder concoct wild, unbelievable stories, often involving narrow escapes from certain death.
damn that guy is GOOD!
he claimed to own a tug boat, and he was a licensed tug boat
pilot, after I joined the military my sister got smart.
he is still in raiford state prison
Alas, I can only aspire to such greatness.
Anyone else know anybody as awesome as this guy?
The Gentleman that does not always drink beer ... but when he does ... he prefers Dos Equis!
Actually, your canidate has Don Dos bettered! [^]
Guy lives up the road about five miles, greatest shot in the world. Shoots deer in eye at 200 yds running, with a 22 lr. I asked him in front of a bunch of his friends to come to the ranch and shoot at one of our clubs matches. Told him to bring his money, he has never shown.
I'm not as polite as I used to be, I tell em to put up or shut up.
People like that chap my *.
W.D.
he had also been wounded in the arm, but the Docs did such a fantastic job sewing him up that there is no scar after all these years later!!
after he finally got fired for other ethical reasons I heard tell that he was telling folks he was an out of state trooper working on a task force..yadda yadda...some folks have such lame lives and low self esteem they have to manufacturer their lives
he'd even wear layers of sweatshirts, even in the summer time to make himself look bigger.