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A question

n/an/a Member Posts: 168,427 ✭
edited May 2009 in General Discussion
If you die of swine flu do you go to hog heaven?
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  • n/an/a Member Posts: 168,427 ✭
    edited November -1
    Q: How many women with MENOPAUSE does it take to change a light bulb?



    Woman's Answer: One! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out. And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to find the # &%!* light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CABINET for the past 17 YEARS!But if they did, by some miracle of God, actually find them, 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE FREAKING LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!! BECAUSE NO ONE EVER PICKS UP OR CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE A FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!!IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS PLACE! AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON WHO CHANGES THE TOILET PAPER ROLL !!



    I'm sorry. What was the question?
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  • mike55mike55 Member Posts: 2,996 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Either that or you turn into Bar-B-Q![}:)][:D]

    Mike
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  • MaxOHMSMaxOHMS Member Posts: 14,715
    edited November -1
    when pigs fly
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  • dav1965dav1965 Member Posts: 26,540 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Only in NC they have the best BBQ[:D][:D][:D]
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  • RtWngExtrmstRtWngExtrmst Member Posts: 7,456
    edited November -1
    Ypu're already in hog heaven.
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  • RogueStatesmanRogueStatesman Member Posts: 5,760
    edited November -1
    Or you could end up in hog lot hell!
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  • 53hawkeye53hawkeye Member Posts: 4,673
    edited November -1
    Hawg Haven (subdivision) 5 mi. N. of Onalaska on FM 356 on the banks of Lake Livingston in Trinity County, Texas.

    Some good bass fishin. Not the worst place to spend eternity.[:D]
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  • War Pig ActualWar Pig Actual Member Posts: 2,063 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    I did not have sexual relations with that pig.
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