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Full circle
savage170
Member Posts: 37,565 ✭✭✭✭
When I was 14, I hoped that one day I would have a girlfriend with *
When I was 16 I got a girlfriend, but there was no passion, so I decided I needed a passionate girl with a zest for life.
In college I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. Everything was an emergency; she was a drama queen, cried all the time and threatened suicide. So I decided I needed a girl with stability.
When I was 25 I found a very stable girl but she was boring. She was totally predictable and never got excited about anything. Life became so dull that I decided that I needed a girl with some excitement.
When I was 28 I found an exciting girl, but I couldn't keep up with her. She rushed from one thing to another, never settling on anything. She did mad impetuous things and made me miserable as often as happy. She was great fun initially and very energetic, but directionless. So I decided to find a girl with some real ambition.
When I turned 31, I found a smart ambitious girl with her feet planted firmly on the ground and married her. She was so ambitious that she divorced me and took everything I owned.
I am now older and wiser, and am looking for a girl with *.
When I was 16 I got a girlfriend, but there was no passion, so I decided I needed a passionate girl with a zest for life.
In college I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. Everything was an emergency; she was a drama queen, cried all the time and threatened suicide. So I decided I needed a girl with stability.
When I was 25 I found a very stable girl but she was boring. She was totally predictable and never got excited about anything. Life became so dull that I decided that I needed a girl with some excitement.
When I was 28 I found an exciting girl, but I couldn't keep up with her. She rushed from one thing to another, never settling on anything. She did mad impetuous things and made me miserable as often as happy. She was great fun initially and very energetic, but directionless. So I decided to find a girl with some real ambition.
When I turned 31, I found a smart ambitious girl with her feet planted firmly on the ground and married her. She was so ambitious that she divorced me and took everything I owned.
I am now older and wiser, and am looking for a girl with *.
Comments
LAUGH ENJOY!
Growing up is a weird notion to wrap your mind around. As you go through life, your perspectives on almost everything will change. How you define success will change as well. Things that you thought were important at the age of 35 will be useless when you're 65. You may not realize it now, but everything will shift...
At age 4 success is not peeing in your pants.
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At age 12 success is having friends.
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At age 16 success is having a driver's license.
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At age 20 success is having sex.
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At age 35 success is having money.
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At age 60 success is having money
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At age 70 success is having sex.
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At age 80 success is having a driver's license.
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At age 85 success is having friends.
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At age 90 success is not peeing in your pants.
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It all comes full circle, whether you like it or not.
Share this hilarious truth about life with others.
*****
1960 Hits Renamed
Some of the artists of the 60's are revising their hits with new lyrics to accommodate aging baby boomers who can remember doing the "Limbo" as if it were yesterday.
They include :
Herman's Hermits ---
Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Walker
Ringo Starr ---
I Get By With A Little Help From Depends
The Bee Gees ---
How Can You Mend A Broken Hip?
Roberta Flack---
The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face
?
Johnny Nash ---
I Can't See Clearly Now
Paul Simon---
Fifty Ways To Lose Your Liver
The Commodores ---
Once, Twice, Three Times To The Bathroom
Procol Harem---
A Whiter Shade Of Hair
Leo Sayer ---
You Make Me Feel Like Napping
The Temptations ---
Papa's Got A Kidney Stone
Abba---
Denture Queen
Tony Orlando ---
Knock 3 Times On The Ceiling If You Hear Me Fall
Helen Reddy ---
I Am Woman; Hear Me Snore
Leslie Gore---
It's My Procedure, and I'll Cry If I Want To
And Last , but NOT least:
Willie Nelson ---
On the Commode Again