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Hypothetically speaking

westernMDhunterwesternMDhunter Member Posts: 2,938 ✭✭✭
edited July 2015 in General Discussion
If someone took a crap in the bed of your pickup truck and just so happened when they jumped out their wallet fell to the ground and you found it, what would you do?

Comments

  • MG1890MG1890 Member Posts: 4,460 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    Keep the cash and mailbox the wallet. The cash is the fine for turding your truck.
  • Horse Plains DrifterHorse Plains Drifter Forums Admins, Member, Moderator Posts: 40,224 ***** Forums Admin
    edited November -1
    I would keep any cash, throw out any credit cards, along with his DL on the street so crooks might find them. Scoop up crap, and put in shoe box along with remains of wallet. Mail to address on DL.
  • reloader44magreloader44mag Member Posts: 18,783 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Wash the sheet out of my truck and enjoy my new wallet[:)]
  • buschmasterbuschmaster Member Posts: 14,229 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    the cops wouldn't say that was enough proof to do anything to him legally, and contacting him through the info on the DL to * at him wouldn't do any good, so my recourse would be to get even by tossing his wallet in the trash.
  • andrewsw16andrewsw16 Member Posts: 10,728 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    I would keep any cash as the cleaning fee, replace the cash in the wallet with one of the turds, and mail it back to him.

    We are, of course, assuming he hasn't been set up by an enemy who stole his wallet and intentionally left it there in hopes of inspiring just such a reaction from the truck owner. Ya never know these days. Dirty tricks are everywhere. [;)]
  • wiplashwiplash Member Posts: 7,145 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by westernMDhunter
    If someone took a crap in the bed of your pickup truck and just so happened when they jumped out their wallet fell to the ground and you found it, what would you do?


    Wait, what?
    There is no such thing as Liberal Men, only Liberal Women with Penises.'
  • Mk 19Mk 19 Member Posts: 8,170
    edited November -1
    If I asked my pastor this question he would say to nicely take the wallet back to him, do not take anything from it, just be the good guy, then the guilt he would feel would eat him up inside.

    Of course if it was me I would have a dump truck drop a full load of manure on his front porch and use his credit card to pay for it.
  • BeeramidBeeramid Member Posts: 7,264 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Place his belongings, including the crap, in a zip lock, forget about it in the sun for a day or two, and then return it to him.
  • booter_onebooter_one Member Posts: 2,345
    edited November -1
    Did you lose your wallet?[;)]
  • shilowarshilowar Member Posts: 38,811 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by Mk 19
    If I asked my pastor this question he would say to nicely take the wallet back to him, do not take anything from it, just be the good guy, then the guilt he would feel would eat him up inside.

    Of course if it was me I would have a dump truck drop a full load of manure on his front porch and use his credit card to pay for it.


    That's awesome..hahaha
  • select-fireselect-fire Member Posts: 69,518 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Chase them down, drag them to the truck, open the tailgate and use them as a piece of toilet paper. Then stick the wallet in their mouth and kick them in the rear end. Then just be casual and put it in gear and leave.
  • Bubba JoelBubba Joel Member Posts: 5,161
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by westernMDhunter
    If someone took a crap in the bed of your pickup truck and just so happened when they jumped out their wallet fell to the ground and you found it, what would you do?


    How would you know if it was the same guys wallet? Maybe just a passerby dropped it. Unless you were watching the guy doing it.
  • Sam06Sam06 Member Posts: 21,244 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by Horse Plains Drifter
    I would keep any cash, throw out any credit cards, along with his DL on the street so crooks might find them. Scoop up crap, and put in shoe box along with remains of wallet. Mail to address on DL.


    ^^This^^
    RLTW

  • buschmasterbuschmaster Member Posts: 14,229 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by Mk 19
    If I asked my pastor this question he would say to nicely take the wallet back to him, do not take anything from it, just be the good guy, then the guilt he would feel would eat him up inside.

    Of course if it was me I would have a dump truck drop a full load of manure on his front porch and use his credit card to pay for it.

    "you want a dump truck full of manure delivered to a residential address?"

    "yessir, and you will note the address for delivery is the same as the billing address on the credit card"

    "o-kay...."

    [:D][:D][}:)]
  • Chief ShawayChief Shaway Member, Moderator Posts: 6,289 ******
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by buschmaster
    quote:Originally posted by Mk 19
    If I asked my pastor this question he would say to nicely take the wallet back to him, do not take anything from it, just be the good guy, then the guilt he would feel would eat him up inside.

    Of course if it was me I would have a dump truck drop a full load of manure on his front porch and use his credit card to pay for it.

    "you want a dump truck full of manure delivered to a residential address?"

    "yessir, and you will note the address for delivery is the same as the billing address on the credit card"

    "o-kay...."

    [:D][:D][}:)]

    You can shovel up manure. Now, a truck load of baseball sized rock, can't shovel that. [}:)][;)]
  • discusdaddiscusdad Member Posts: 11,427 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    thats an absolutely wicked idea Chief. i like it!
  • bullshotbullshot Member Posts: 14,718 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Throw the credit cards and ID out on the bad side of town then place the S__t and the wallet into a padded envelope (making sure to blend thoroughly [:D]) and mail it back to the jerk.
    "Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you"
  • SoreShoulderSoreShoulder Member Posts: 3,148 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    I don't think you're going to get your wallet back.[:D]

    You don't know if the crap belongs to the wallet. Might be two different people
  • spasmcreekspasmcreek Member Posts: 37,717 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    don't know what nirvana you live in but 99% of the bozos i am aware of have NO GUILT...about anything....
  • westernMDhunterwesternMDhunter Member Posts: 2,938 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by buschmaster
    the cops wouldn't say that was enough proof to do anything to him legally, and contacting him through the info on the DL to * at him wouldn't do any good, so my recourse would be to get even by tossing his wallet in the trash.


    What if the DNA taken from the stool sample matched the DNA from the wallet?
  • westernMDhunterwesternMDhunter Member Posts: 2,938 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by reloader44mag
    Wash the sheet out of my truck and enjoy my new wallet[:)]


    That's no way to pay it forward.
  • Smitty500magSmitty500mag Member Posts: 13,623 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    I would take my truck to a detail shop and have them do the most expensive wax and detail job they have at his expense. Then I'd have my wife take a picture of me standing beside my beautifully clean truck and send it to him with a note of appreciation.
  • westernMDhunterwesternMDhunter Member Posts: 2,938 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by andrewsw16


    We are, of course, assuming he hasn't been set up by an enemy who stole his wallet and intentionally left it there in hopes of inspiring just such a reaction from the truck owner. Ya never know these days. Dirty tricks are everywhere. [;)]


    You might be on to something here. This guy could have crapped in someone else's truck, dropped his wallet and now we have a vicious circle of people crapping in the bed of pickups and leaving this guys wallet hoping someone will pay him a visit. Never can be to careful these days.[:D]
  • westernMDhunterwesternMDhunter Member Posts: 2,938 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by booter_one
    Did you lose your wallet?[;)]


    Twice this week.[:D]
  • westernMDhunterwesternMDhunter Member Posts: 2,938 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by select-fire
    Chase them down, drag them to the truck, open the tailgate and use them as a piece of toilet paper. Then stick the wallet in their mouth and kick them in the rear end. Then just be casual and put it in gear and leave.


    Which gear, reverse?
  • TwoDogsTwoDogs Member Posts: 2,011 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Where the hell did you park ?
  • woodshed87woodshed87 Member Posts: 23,478 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    What did You Do to Him Or His First[;)]
    Crap happens For Reasons[:I]
  • TrinityScrimshawTrinityScrimshaw Member Posts: 9,350 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Put the wallet & crap in a paper bag.

    Place it on his door step, light it on fire, knock & run!...[;)]

    Trinity +++
  • Ditch-RunnerDitch-Runner Member Posts: 25,365 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    there has been a couple crimes ( break ins ) on the local news I would say over the last year where the dumb * left there wallet one rammed a building to get in a and left his license plate ... with that in mind dropping a wallet while leaving a truck bed is possible
    I would guess some one doing that there will be no cash or CC in that wallet . maybe a ID to get there welfare benefits [:(!]
    on the long shot there was cash and CC's keep the cash to cover cleaning and bleaching the "crap " out of truck [:D] toss the rest out in a obumer supporting hood they would know how to put it to go use
  • westernMDhunterwesternMDhunter Member Posts: 2,938 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by woodshed87
    What did You Do to Him Or His First[;)]
    Crap happens For Reasons[:I]


    This is hypothetically speaking but now you've got me wanting to write a country song about it.
  • jev1969jev1969 Member Posts: 2,691
    edited November -1
    Mail him a picture of the wallet sitting in the turd then toss the wallet in the trash. That way he knows where he lost it, why he isn't getting it back and has to go through the hassle of replacing everything.
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