In order to participate in the GunBroker Member forums, you must be logged in with your GunBroker.com account. Click the sign-in button at the top right of the forums page to get connected.
mustard anyone?
jwb267
Member Posts: 19,664 ✭✭✭
Love Mustard. (This is a true story. If you have children you will probably relate to this father.)
As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection: a thick slab of ham on a fresh bun with crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet mustard. The corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the table in our backyard, picked it up
with both hands but was stopped by my wife suddenly at my side."Here, hold Johnny (our six-week-old son) while I get my sandwich,"she said. I had him balanced between my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching again for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my fingers. I love mustard. I had no napkin.
I licked it off. It was not mustard. No man ever put a baby down faster. It was the first and only time I have sprinted with my tongue protruding. With a washcloth in each hand, I did the sort of routine shoeshine boys do; only I did it on my tongue. Later, after she stopped crying from laughing so hard, my wife said, "Now you know why they call that fancy mustard "Poupon."
As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection: a thick slab of ham on a fresh bun with crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet mustard. The corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the table in our backyard, picked it up
with both hands but was stopped by my wife suddenly at my side."Here, hold Johnny (our six-week-old son) while I get my sandwich,"she said. I had him balanced between my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching again for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my fingers. I love mustard. I had no napkin.
I licked it off. It was not mustard. No man ever put a baby down faster. It was the first and only time I have sprinted with my tongue protruding. With a washcloth in each hand, I did the sort of routine shoeshine boys do; only I did it on my tongue. Later, after she stopped crying from laughing so hard, my wife said, "Now you know why they call that fancy mustard "Poupon."
Comments
You know how someone will eat something and comment "Man, this tastes like chit!"? Well he is one of those folk who actually know what chit tastes like. Their family had just eaten chili for dinner and he was helping clear the dinner table. One of their kids, still in diapers didn't clean their bowl, so he decided to do it for him. Sumpin' didn't taste right. Seems the youngin' was cleaning out his diaper by hand and making deposits in the chili.[:0][B)][xx(]
.
And fiery auto crashes
Some will die in hot pursuit
While sifting through my ashes
Some will fall in love with life
And drink it from a fountain
That is pouring like an avalanche
Coming down the mountain
Ahahaha I dunno if I want kids... Lol "excuse me sir, do you have any gray poupon?" ahahaha I can't stop laughin. Reminds me of the time I was about 7 or 8 and convinced my sister (3 years younger than me) that the dog turd on the ground was a piece of chocolate.
the bennies of having kids, make these sorts of things MORE than tolerable.
And fiery auto crashes
Some will die in hot pursuit
While sifting through my ashes
Some will fall in love with life
And drink it from a fountain
That is pouring like an avalanche
Coming down the mountain
quote:Originally posted by coltpax
Ahahaha I dunno if I want kids... Lol "excuse me sir, do you have any gray poupon?" ahahaha I can't stop laughin. Reminds me of the time I was about 7 or 8 and convinced my sister (3 years younger than me) that the dog turd on the ground was a piece of chocolate.
the bennies of having kids, make these sorts of things MORE than tolerable.
I would hope so!
Suffice it to say that what was on the kitchen floor was NOT apple butter![xx(]
Well that's a little worse than drinkin coffee from the wrong styrofoam cup. My buddies Red Man spit cup! That's my worse story. Don't like to think about it much.[:)]
[xx(] Reminds me, I did the same thing with a friends beer bottle.
/