A discussion of life's lessons learned the hard way. This usually involves pain!!

dreher

The pain can be physical or emotional but pain is a wonderful teacher.  IF you live through it!!  So let's do a long list of things we learned the hard way.  These can major things or minor things but things we painfully learned from.

I'll start off with a minor life lesson learned the painful way.

Never shoot any semi-auto rifle unless you are wearing socks!!   Why is this you ask??  I well remember a perfectly 223 shaped blister on the side of my foot.  An ejected casing dropped right between my shoe and my sockless foot.  By the time I got that casing out of my shoe I had a very large water blister on my foot!!

Keep them coming!!  There has to thousands of painful life lessons out there!! 

KenK/84Bravo

Putting your bare leg on a motorcycle muffler.

Jumping on a huge Beach ball on an above ground pool from a picnic table. (Stitches involved on that one.)

Don't try and beat the rapidly closing garage door on your tricycle that your older Brother is slamming shut after beating you into the garage on his scooter. (Lots of stitches on that one.)

(1st set of stitches.) Mom was vacuuming the hardwood floor at our place in Germany in anticipation of a move. Ken being 1 year old, was running across the floor in his Walker (why were they called Walkers?) Hit the power cord at full speed and cartwheeled. Yep ER here we come.

Letting older kids dare you into touching your tongue to a frozen metal pole.

Got lots of em'.

Ricci.Wright

When you work the counter at an indoor range you need to develop a tactful way to explain to lady shooters that while all that cleavage is pleasing to the eye, it may not be the best idea when there is hot brass flying around.

varian

Ricci:  i would think helping those ladies remove the hot brass from that area would be a wonderful job for a range officer.

KenK/84Bravo

Sam06 will like this one. In Basic training at Fort Lost in the Woods 1980. Killing some time at the shooting range.

Guy starts tossing some gravel across the dirt road from a pile. Drill Sergeant spots him. He now has to move the pile from one side of the road to the other, one at a time, while counting them. When we had to march back to base, (like 8-10 miles) he had to fill up every single pocket on his BDU's with as much gravel as they would hold.

Oh, and when the Drill Sergeant tells you all to pick up cigarette butts in your dead time, it's best not to point out that you don't smoke.

Rocky Raab

When I was about three, I tried to prove that one could ride a tricycle down the basement stairs. Tried it TWICE.

chme

When you have paint on your hands, it is not a good idea to rub a handfull of jelly type paint stripper on them....

ChrisStreett

Hmmm, when I was about 16 there was this case of old sweaty dynamite in a falling down shed...

SW0320

Don't fall while ski jumping.  You will break at least one bone.  I happened to break a collar bone just before Christmas.  My mother bought me a bar bell set for Christmas.  She could not get it out of the trunk of the car, nor could my little brother, stayed there until about March,.  Helped the traction on the old rear wheel drive Rambler.

KenK/84Bravo

Cutting up seriously Hot Peppers, then rubbing your eyes.

Being in the Gas Chamber with the Idiot that could not remember his Weapons # before we could all run out. (Like the Sergeants in the Gas Chamber knew everyones Weapon #.) We pummeled the Idiot when we finally got outside.

jimdeere

DO NOT stick your finger in a blind hole. ANY blind hole.

NeoBlackdog

SW0320 said:

Don't fall while ski jumping.  You will break at least one bone.  I happened to break a collar bone just before Christmas.  My mother bought me a bar bell set for Christmas.  She could not get it out of the trunk of the car, nor could my little brother, stayed there until about March,.  Helped the traction on the old rear wheel drive Rambler.

When attempting to do a back flip off of the jump do not chicken out halfway through.  If you're going to do it, then commit!  I landed on the back of my head so hard it still hurts 40 years later!!!  I've been told it was one of the most impressive ski wrecks anyone had ever witnessed!

KenK/84Bravo

I've got a nice scar on the back of my head from doing a helicopter (on skis) and landing on some idiot that came in underneath me Neo.

When I got home that night, my bandana was frozen/stuck to my head from blood. Lost a big chunk of flesh on that one. I can feel the big scar right now. 🤕

mogley98

Don't install a meter box and disconnect on a eight foot 6*6 and then drop it into a 2 foot hole when you are 5'6" the resulting knocked out cold is as embarrassing as the big hole in your head.

Bubba Jr.

If you're nailing a block on the back of a piece of wood with a pneumatic brad nailer, don't hold it in place with your hand.    

If you have a bike that the chain slips, don't stand up to pedal uphill (that happened so often on my paper route over a 3 year period, I was actually surprised when my wife told me she was pregnant).

When you are sanding the front porch columns, don't put one foot on the top step of the ladder and then try to put the other one up there too. That one separated 4 ribs, dislocated 6 vertebrae, sprained my right knee and right ankle, and left a big knot on the back of my head. That's the reason I can't sleep in a bed anymore.

Old Timer

When your parents buy you new shoes don't forget and leave them in the yard. I did it and it rained that night. My father found them in the morning and whipped butt good with the wet shoes. I understand it now, they didn't have money to waste. I never did it again.

When a nun asks you if your friend jumps off of a bridge are you going to do that too? Don't respond it depends how high it is. Rulers on knuckles are never a good experience.

Brookwood

Don't ever hold a lit match over an open empty 5 gal. gas can!   Singed the front bristles of my then princeton haircut as well as both of my eyebrows!  My forehead was redder than a baboons butt for at least a week.   

Never try to do a handstand from the handlebars of your Schwinn Stingray while cruising down a freshly paved tar & chip rural road. Especially while being closely followed by your beagle.  

I learned a great deal from that one!  Beagles can be blood thirsty little bastages!

kimi

Try not to think of a 30-06 shell casing, ejected from the rifle of the shooter to your left, going down the back of your collar during a string of rapid fire in an important rifle match.

pulsarnc

Never every in any case use an acetylene cutting torch to cut up a car body while wearing tennis shoes

select-fire

Falling off a car trailer while someone drives the car you just purchased on it. Breaking 4 ribs and driving home 800 mile. But that is peanuts to passing kidney stones....

asop

Always hire a professional to adjust an overhead door that has "coil springs"

bustedknee

Never try to pet a curious, cute little ermine standing on a stump.

Make that, never stick your hand in a buzz saw or try to pet a curious, cute little ermine standing on a stump. (same results)

hillbille

black powder does not FFFFFIIIZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ  like it does in the old western, was holding a match over a pile and blew the flame down into it,,,,,,   lost one eyebrow and half a mustache........

Ditch-Runner

 sadly too many "stupid hold my beer stories " and  enough scars as reminders .
 as a young kid so many bicycle wrecks and injuries  to list 
  a bit older and in in the early  driver license era   a few do not hang on the back of a car and see how fast you can run . at some point your feet leave the ground and letting go involves sliding down a gravel ally road rash comes to mind .
    same car and many riders do not sit on top hanging on the luggage rack while the driver(s) we took turns . got to up death speed and swerved from side to side of the road trying to toss you off while the other car contestants in waiting  on there turn to ride  were tossing empty beer bottles up at you .
 the owner of a store I worked at called me evil knevel for years watching me drive thru the parking lot even over a huge dirt pile when they were working close by in a old mustang I staked the landing but about took out the side of the store 
     a very close friend passed a few years ago ( we had drifted apart 20 some years ago )  him and I had too many car and truck adventures .  I could fill  book with all the dumb luck things we lived thru  it my cars 
     I had not thought about for years at his wake I introduced myself to a lot of his family I had never met  . he had told them  a lot of  the stories on me ,  when  hearing my name  I got a lot of attention   I instantly became  surrounded by people and  OMG your Dave . we heard about your adventures ( funny he seemed to have left out his parts ,  RIP Ron )  
      my user name is sort of based on my no fear driving or dying when younger .
 skip ahead when I was  working construction I gained a few more life long mementoes in the form of pain   from falling or being in the wrong place about being crushed with heavy equipment  a few time only by the grace of  God I did not die or suffer serious injury .
 now being older I have added scars from just about ever tool in the tool box  from utility knifes to table saws 
 I know most all of you have done and lived thru worse that I could imagine (  especially the vets and current servers and LEO y for you I tip my hat and say thank you ) 
just sharing a few of my hold my beer moments  funny now thinking back how luck I truly was 
  

victorj19

Don't ride your dirt bike up a 2x4 into a trailer with your wife watching unless you're very proficient.

Don't try to walk the new untrained German shepherd outside the yard on a gravel surface when you are 3 years old.

Don't stand up in the new outhouse and shoot holes in the steel drum with your shotgun after your dad forgot to drill some holes and tells you to go blast some holes in it with your 16 ga sxs unless you have hearing protection.

Don't downshift when going 95 mph to teach a lesson to the  idiot tailgating so close you can't see his headlights for 5 miles.

Don't think the 12' ice is safe after someone moved his shanty before a snowfall.

Nanuq907

Why do mine usually involve mountain bikes?
1) At -20F do not let your bottom lip touch your handlebar going over a bump.


2) Make sure the axle quick-release lever is on the OPPOSITE side from the disc brake.



3) When the motion lights come on, don't always run out to see why

Brookwood

Here is just one more bicycle experience.  Always remember that chain guards are there for a reason!  Especially if you try to look COOL in your brand new bell bottoms in front of the nice looking girls!  

allen griggs

When you are 7 years old, and your parents tell you that a light socket is dangerous, believe them.
Don't stand barefoot on a concrete floor, and stick your finger into a live light socket, just to see for yourself if it really is dangerous.

jimdeere

If you never did this ^^^^ when you were a kid, you were probably a wimp.

kimi

allen griggs said:

When you are 7 years old, and your parents tell you that a light socket is dangerous, believe them.
Don't stand barefoot on a concrete floor, and stick your finger into a live light socket, just to see for yourself if it really is dangerous.

Standing on a kitchen chair on your tippie toes at 5 doesn't work either...good training for hoola hoops, though.

KenK/84Bravo

Having your experienced Ski friends/Buddies take you up to the top lift for your first run or two, telling you to "just point them downhill, you'll be fine." 🤕

Going downhill on Rollerblades on a REALLY steep hill. (Trust me.)

Anytime you utter the infamous words "Hold my beer, and watch this."

Frogdog

A few from my days......

1. Don’t ever trust cross-walks.
2. Don’t let your legs dangle when doubling on the back of a 3-wheeler.
3. Don’t try to set a speed record on your bike the day after the county tars and gravels youre road.
4. Trampolines.....beware the “double-bounce”.
5. Skateboards......”speed wobbles” will always get you in the end.
6. Don’t shoot your wife in the butt with a blow-gun dart.....she won’t think it is as funny as you do.
7. The railroad bridge is higher over the river than it looks.
8. Even if it looks like the gas is gone, it’s still in the dirt. Beware the “whoosh!”
9. If you push him far enough, Grandpa really will make you “pick your own switch.”
10. Iguanas bite......HARD.
11. Dairy cows don’t appreciate being ridden. They also bite.
12. Curiosity and electric fences don’t mix well.
13. Don’t use wet river rocks for your fire ring.
14. Sitting in that old wooden tree stand you come across may not be a good idea
15. Hopping a train is harder than it looks in the movies
16. When transferring from a small-boat to the Jacobs Ladder of a large ship at sea, “commit” is a key word to remember.
17. OC Spray sucks......for EVERYONE involved.

fugawe

Don't strip the insulation off the end of a cord and twist the wires together to make a cool woodburner. Actually it works........for about two seconds. I still have the 'branding' scars.
A knife sharp enough to cut the head off of a plastic dinosaur will also take off a significant chunk of your finger when you let it slip. We used to cut them apart and make new ones by 'welding' parts together. That's where the woodburner was supposed to come in.
Don't be the winner in a contest where you see who can run their bicycle into a wall the fastest.

dreher

Whereas I understand how you learned that particular fact, I am totally at a loss as to why you would want to win that contest??  Since we are talking bikes I am going to guess you were not able to use alcohol as an excuse!         

Nanuq907

When you use bear spray to chase a brown bear out from under your deck and he takes off across the yard, DO NOT run through the cloud of bear spray chasing him.  You'll be blind and he'll be pissed.

Nanuq907

When you put cans of chili on the engine to cook whilst driving, make sure to poke little bitty holes in the tops.  No, that *BOOF* sound you heard and the smoke is NOT from running over a critter.

BikerBob

It’s fine to not have time to go in and get stitches in your hand, but don’t rush to do the job yourself in a truck with a manual shift while sitting in the farm store parking lot after buying the super glue.

grdad45

My first experience being an electrician involved sticking a hairpin in an outlet. I was about three, but my Mom never let me forget it! She said it "Scared the pee" out of her. My Dad was an electrical contractor, so I just got an early start. You might say I have been dealing with electricity for 72 years.
BTW- it put me in the hospital twice!

Toolman286

Mobuck

"DO NOT stick your finger in a blind hole. ANY blind hole."
You didn't know they had teeth in there, did you?

bpost

Never trust a fart when you are over 35!!!!