Why I like retirement.
Geri
Member Posts: 2,100 ✭✭✭
Why I Like Retirement............
Question: How many days in a week?
Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday
Question: When is a retiree's bedtime?
Answer: Three hours after they fall asleep in the recliner.
Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb?
Answer: Only one but it might take all day.
Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done.
Question: Why don't retirees mind being called seniors?
Answer: The term comes with a 10% discount. Sometimes 15%
Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
Answer: Tied shoes.
Question: Why do retirees count pennies?
Answer: They are the only ones who have the time.
Question: What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?
Answer: NUTS!
Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
Answer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.
Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?
Answer: Normal.
Question: What is the best way to describe retirement?
Answer: The never ending coffee break.
Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
Answer: If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.
QUESTION: What do you do all week?
Answer: Monday through Friday, NOTHING..... Saturday & Sunday, I rest.
Comments
Have to agree
With your post
Just ask my wife I would be guilty on most all the charges
I tell everyone that being retired was like when you were about 10 years old,no worries about bills,cars or girlfreinds,and school was out for the summer.As long as the bicycle and the Daisey BB gun worked,life was good.
pretty much my life. just try and do what i want and not do what i dont want.
Retirement is watching other folks work
...and telling them how we used to do it better.
Retirement is great until you reach the point where you're spending more time in the doctors office and hospital and standing in line at the pharmacy than you used to spend at work.
Those comments may fit some but not all.
I think it was meant as a joke there Mr. Mobuck........😉
I'm only semi-retired. I work 2 1/2 days a week, so my weekdays are like this;
Them -- Me
Monday -- Wednesday
Tuesday -- Thursday
Wednesday -- Friday
Thursday -- Saturday
Friday-- Saturday
Saturday-- Saturday
Sunday -- Sunday
My wife says I adapted to retirement VERY EASILY! 😁
The best thing about retirement is that any time of the day can be nap time, and it isn't restricted to just one nap.
Joe
A friend of mine asked me how I liked retirement and what it was like, I asked him,do you remember when you were a kid in school and it was the very first day of summer vacation ..................... well that's my everyday.
Get to watch a crew do a metal roof on a rental so I can sell it. I love not having to work
I still get a kick out of folks that ask me "what do you do all day" ? I guess they must worry I do not find my life fulfilling or are concerned I might be bored....
My general answer is "Most days, whatever I want to !!!" 🙃
I usually reply worrying about you working all those long hours...
My recliner has snooze control.
We're doing a bunch of work on our retirement home. When my wife tells people that we're retired I add in that she's retired, I'm doing the same work I used to do I just don't have to drive anywhere to do it!