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I just found out my idiot brother...

Bubba Jr.Bubba Jr. Member Posts: 8,176 ✭✭✭✭
edited April 2022 in General Discussion

Has stage 4 cancer in his neck. My other brother and I both told him that the big lump on his neck would probably eventually kill him, but we were certain he wouldn't do anything about it, and it turns out we were right on both counts.

Joe

Comments

  • Ruger4meRuger4me Member, Moderator Posts: 3,312 ******

    Sorry to hear this, hope he can be treated successfully.

  • mike55mike55 Member Posts: 2,853 ✭✭✭✭

    Well, maybe don't tell him that in so many words. Prayers for your brother.

  • asopasop Member Posts: 8,898 ✭✭✭✭

    It is what it is my friend. He's still your brother. Hope for the best for all concerned.

  • montanajoemontanajoe Forums Admins, Member, Moderator Posts: 57,892 ******

    Oh no. Prayer sent

  • select-fireselect-fire Member Posts: 69,453 ✭✭✭✭

    best wishes for him

  • WarbirdsWarbirds Member Posts: 16,814 ✭✭✭✭

    Spend time with him and keep it positive!

  • Ditch-RunnerDitch-Runner Member Posts: 24,450 ✭✭✭✭

    sorry to hear he is still your brother best wishes for him and the family

    I can relate completely my only brother ( younger ) had a lump in his neck kept putting off having it checked . long story short by the time he did go in for a check up and found out and the docs then cut pasted and tossed all the meds and treatments it was too late he died from cancer no matter how bad he was and how much he abused his body with booze , drugs and cigs . I still miss him 😥

  • Horse Plains DrifterHorse Plains Drifter Forums Admins, Member, Moderator Posts: 39,309 ***** Forums Admin

    Prayers for your brother from here.

  • Bubba Jr.Bubba Jr. Member Posts: 8,176 ✭✭✭✭

    I wasn't going to go into this, but I feel you guys deserve an explanation why my feelings towards him are mostly negative. Mom told me years ago that he didn't talk at all until he was almost 3 years old. He was always strange as a kid, and it only got worse as he got older. He wasn't retarded, but he did have a lot of issues that mimicked retardation in a milder state.

    When Dad died he sent a letter to Dad's wife accusing her of doing all kinds of things that were totally fabricated in his mind. It upset her so much that she had a heart attack and eventually died. He pulled the same stunt with Mom's husband with his baseless lies and nonsense. He accused me of not caring for Mom when she was in the nursing home. That really made me mad. I was her Power of Attorney and did everything that needed to get done to keep both Mom and her husband as happy and as healthy as possible. I saw them every week, and it wasn't unusual to go there 2-4 times a week to straighten out issues that they created. Meanwhile, my idiot brother did everything he could to try to disrupt my caring for Mom and her husband. It finally got to the point that I wanted nothing else to do with him and told him to stay away from me.

    The stress of having to deal with his childish nonsense is mostly gone.

    The worst part of the whole situation is that when he is gone, I'm the one that is going to have to clean up his mess. The last time I was in his house years ago I could only stomach the smells and trash everywhere for a few minutes until I had to leave.

    Trust me, my feelings towards him have over 70 years of facts to back them up.

    Joe

  • mohawk600mohawk600 Member Posts: 5,373 ✭✭✭✭

    Sorry to hear this...................as for ignoring blatant signs of illness..........here is my story:

    I had an abnormally swollen testicle and just thought (hopefully) that it might be a testicular torsion due to my physical activity (look it up). I let it run for about 3 months and when it didn't get better I went to the hospital to get checked out.........yup..........cancer. Surgery and rating of the cancer...........I got really lucky.......it was Stage 1 and a slow growing type. Had 3 months of chemo just to make sure, and now I am good...........I'm past the 10 year mark now.

    Don't ignore physical abnormalities...........they aren't normal.

  • grdad45grdad45 Member Posts: 5,304 ✭✭✭✭

    Sorry to hear that your brother caused you so much pain and trouble, and sorry for his predicament. I have a sister who caused so much trouble I haven't spoken to her in over 8 years. When she goes, I'm surely not going to clean up after her.

  • Smitty500magSmitty500mag Member Posts: 13,603 ✭✭✭✭
    edited April 2022

    That's sad news. I was taking care of my wife for almost 2 years with bone and lung cancer before she died 6 months ago. It's excruciating pain when it spreads to the spine and other bones. My wife never smoked a cigarette in her life and the stage 4 lung cancer spread to her spine and leg bones and pelvis and all the while the doctor was telling us it was arthritis in her shoulders until it was to late. It ate her vertebras completely up in her neck. while giving her Tylenol 4 for the pain.

    My sister and 92 year old Mom became drug mules going to their friends houses raiding medicine cabinets for any left over pain meds and any where else they could find any in Tennessee for her and bringing it to Georgia for her to keep me from having to go onto the streets and buying illegal drugs. These lawmakers can kiss my * if they think I was going to let my wife die from the pain. Bunch of sorry SOB's the lawmakers that make criminals out of people's loved ones for trying to take care of their pain. I hope they die in the same pain my wife died with only worse while begging their doctor for pain medicine.

    Finally an very intelligent Asian emergency room doctor took one look at her when I took her in one night when the pain was so unbearable she couldn't stand it any longer and he said that's not pain from Arthritis and did an MRI and a couple hours later informed us she had stage 4 lung and bone cancer.

    Get your brother Into palliative care where he can continue taking chemo treatment if he want's it and they'll give him plenty of pain meds but regular doctors won't they treat you like you're a dope attic just wanting pain meds and they're deathly afraid of the sorry lawmakers that can get their licenses for taking care of their patients pain.

    If he goes to hospice care they cut the chemo off and give you pain meds and the insurance pays 100 percent of everything because pain meds and nurses is all you get till you die.

    I kept my wife at home and took care of her myself for almost 2 years and ran the nurses off because all they were doing was taking her vital signs and pretending they cared. That didn't help anything and it was right during the pandemic and the last thing we needed was my wife getting sick from these nurses that go to everybody's houses and half don't wash their hands and wear their mask down past their noses. They did absolutely nothing to help. The nurses in the hospitals were great but the ones they send to your house are a bunch of rejects from hospitals that couldn't make the cut.

    The surgeon had to replace the vertebras in my wife's neck with a cage and 2 steel rods tied to good vertebras further down and up her spine to keep her neck from coming loose from the spinal cord. Nothing was holding it. We were hoping the chemo and radiation would give her 3 to 5 more good years to her life but that didn't happen and I'm sure they knew it wouldn't. All they did was keep her hopes up with false BS so they could continue treating her and charge us and the insurance co. over one million and nine hundred thousand dollars and now they're still wanting more money after she's dead. Cancer is big business and I'd bet the farm they're not trying all that hard to cure it. If they did it would put millions of people out of work and the drug companies would go under.

    In 2020, there were 602,350 cancer deaths in the US and all the government talks about is the China flu. And that's just the ones that died while there's 3 times that many that's lying some where suffering a terrible death that's coming.

  • notnownotnow Member Posts: 1,802 ✭✭✭

    Didn't talk till he was 3. I don't suppose it matters much now but that sounds like autism spectrum disorder.

  • Bubba Jr.Bubba Jr. Member Posts: 8,176 ✭✭✭✭

    I think you may have hit the nail on the head, I never thought of that.

    Joe

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