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Automated answering system at the Police Department

William81William81 Member Posts: 25,336 ✭✭✭✭
in General Discussion


Hello, you have reached the Police Dept's Voice Mail. Pay close

attention as we have to update the choices often as new and usual circumstances arrive.


Please select one of the following options:


To whine about us not doing anything to solve a problem that you

created yourself, press 1.


To inquire as to whether someone has to die before we'll do something

about a problem, press 2.


To report an officer for bad manners, when in reality the officer is

trying to keep your neighborhood safe, press 3.


If you would like us to raise your children, press 4.


If you would like us to take control of your life due to your chemical

dependency or alcohol, press 5.


If you would like us to instantly restore order to a situation that

took years to deteriorate, press 6.


To provide a list of officers you personally know so we will not take

enforcement action against you, press 7.


To sue us, or tell us you pay our salary and you'll have our badge, or

to proclaim our career is over, press 8.


To whine about a ticket and/or complain about the many other uses for

police rather than keeping your dumb butt in line, press 9.


Please note your call may be monitored to assure proper customer

support and remember .....we're here to save your rear end, NOT kiss it!

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