Funerals, How many hate to go

Byron R. EnglerByron R. Engler Member Posts: 20 ✭✭
edited April 2010 in US Military Veteran Forum
After coming home, I never could get myself to go to funerals. I was sick of death, dying and the like. It became a phobia. I had to force myself to go to Relative's funerals, but Would never view the body. I would go to the chapel, church or graveside for the ceremony, no viewing for me. Never was that way before I saw so many dead bodies.

I cannot even bring myself to go to the Veterans Day Celebrations. Anyone else in this same boat. I sometimes feel that people think I am rude, but it just haunts me.


  • Ray BRay B Member Posts: 11,822
    edited November -1
    Very rarely do I ever go to funerals, weddings, or visit new-born babies in the hospital; it's all about the same to me.
  • Byron R. EnglerByron R. Engler Member Posts: 20 ✭✭
    edited November -1

    I say amen to that. I do not like alot of people around either. Weddings and Hospital visits bother me also. I was thinking it was maybe just me. Thanks for the reply. Gave me more of a reality check. Family thinks I am nuts, I guess they do not realize PTSD is a metal condition. Stopped trying to explain it to wife and kids long ago.
  • Smoky14Smoky14 Member Posts: 503 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    I could not go to either of my parents funerals. I was funeral escort for 22 of the guys I was stationed with and got my fill of it.
    Not sure if I'll go to my own[xx(]
  • Patriots sonPatriots son Member Posts: 915 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Kinda nice to know I'm not the only one, I haven't been to a funeral in 20 yrs, and anyone who knows me knows I wont be their physically,
    but my heart and soul is mourning.
  • Grunt2Grunt2 Member Posts: 1,593 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    I'm not going to my own if I can help it...
    Retired LEO
    Combat Vet VN
  • gap1916gap1916 Member Posts: 4,977
    edited November -1
    No funerals and no weddings. My 2 cents [8D]
  • woodshermitwoodshermit Member Posts: 2,589
    edited November -1
    I can go to a graveside service if I think it will be supportive of family or friends. Going to viewings at a funeral home are just plain creepy to me.
  • br549br549 Member Posts: 1,024 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    i can't go to funerals myself it brings back too manybad memorys. i also can't go see people who are dieing it tares my guts out
  • AdironduckAdironduck Member Posts: 314 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    It has been difficult for me also.I've felt for several years that I would like to volunteer for the honor guard at the national cemetary near my home.Now that I am retired I did volunteer.Coincidently,I went today to observe ceramonies as part of the training and could not stop a tear from forming.I'm not an emotional guy but it brought back memories,sad memories.
  • lee1935lee1935 Member Posts: 4 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    . Anyone else in this same boat. I sometimes feel that people think I am rude, but it just haunts me.

    The last service I attended was June 1966 and as several have said when it's my time they will have to put me in a box and nail the lid down tight
  • elubsmeelubsme Member Posts: 1,162 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    None of us like to go to a funeral. I consider it an obligation & a final show of respect. Eddie life member NRA & VFW
  • airmungairmung Member Posts: 579 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Only thing worse than a funeral is a wedding.
  • joker19joker19 Member Posts: 110 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    spent two tours as a UH1C gunship (Da Nang and he Sahn)combat pilot and can"t figure ut what the hell you are so wound about! I go to them all to remember what we all were doing and to not forget them. Do what you wish.......but don't forgt them. I truely don't believe most on this sight have ever been there and simply are playing a game.....you are found out by these kinds of comments about fallen commrads.
  • joker19joker19 Member Posts: 110 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    BR549...what bad memories of a funeral do you harbor? Me thinks you are a wanna be!
  • joker19joker19 Member Posts: 110 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    Byron, what an absolute crock of poop! No one could have seen the bodies on the scale you say you have. I spent two tours in I corps and mostly in Khe Sahn and Dong Ha in a combat unit and saw maybe 50 at the most. Where in the hell would you a an individual soldier seen this kind of body count? Other than the Ah Drang and Tet 68 Khe Sahn and the Citadel would this body count come into sight. I had a BC of 221 and never saw more than 5 of them. I think you are a little bit of an exageration!
  • blackpowdermaxblackpowdermax Member Posts: 130 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    joker19....." Methinks the lady doest protest too much ". If you're not familiar with this line from Shakespeare, it means that those who protest too loudly aren't sincere. Methinks thou doest protest too much. For what it's worth, I dread going to funerals, even wondering what I will do if other Vietnam Veteran friends pass on before I do. Haven't decided yet. Oops, guess that makes me a wannabe. Wonder where all of these memories came from......

    Remember this: "you are found out by these kinds of comments about fallen commrads."

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