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This could be in another thread, but I'll give you all the chance to laugh at me now. You know the trick where you hit somebody's beer bottle w/ your own, and get it to foam up? Well last friday one of my buddies did it to one of my other buddies, and when he turned around to yell at him, I hit it again. haha..funny funny.
Well here I am talking to these two fairly hot girls, and my friend trades beers with me, without me or the girls noticing. As I'm casually talking about life, love, babies, and baby animals, I take a big friggin drink of foam. My mouth chipmunked. My face exploded. My mouth chipmunked again, and I swallowed what was left. This one girl(very hot)looks at me and says, "That didn't just happen." I was thinking, "yes darling, I'm sorry. I may have just yacked on your shoes."
I didn't have smoothness to counteract it. It sucked.
Thanks for the laugh, that was freakin hel-larious.
This could turn into the longest thread ever.
Speakin of smoothness or lack of, I was at a bar, was fairly intoxicated(I was not driving) and this pretty attractive lady was talkin to a guy at the table next to us, she gave him a hug so I thought hmmm, wonder if I can get one of those, I hopped up asked for a hug, got it started talkin to her, then she said "you are a very handsome man", so what did I do, I said "thanks, hope I see ya around" and left her standin there. Not sure why I guess I wasn't expecting that. She had a look on her face like what the h3ll just happened. Not funny like bens but more of a man I'm a dork thing.
The night of my pull over I walked a girl back to her Car that I was driving home.She is one of my best friends, so after carrying her 3 blocks basically we leave. So im the good guy for taking care of her. the next night its my turn to not drive we she likes to be my wing girl. So this ugly 33 year old lady xomes over and starts talking to her. well i get the wink and try to get her to leave in the way of buying her a drink thinking she wont come back. Well the treasure troll did come back and started hitting on me big time groping me stuff like that. I wanted nothing to do with her and give my wing girl the wink and off to the bathroom i go. well tresure troll is still there when i get back So i text message my wing girl who told her that I was single and availible. needless to say I went to the bar ASAP and started drinking sjots of jack got real drunk and went home minus the troll. She will get hers next time shes at the bar and wants me to be her boyfriend
[:D]
I have failed one and passed two so I guess my average is decent. The one I failed was rather costly and changed my habits A LOT. Camping with fellow failers was kinda fun though. [:D]
quote:Originally posted by Suspension
[:D]
I have failed one and passed two so I guess my average is decent. The one I failed was rather costly and changed my habits A LOT. Camping with fellow failers was kinda fun though. [:D]
Where ya been susp. Does she have you chained up? So lets here your campin' story.[:D]
I don't have very many drinking stories. One was when I was trying to get on with a police agency here in the state oh about 12+ years ago. My two buddies who were also trying, had interviews a few days before mine. I went with them and got a hotel room the night before their interviews and drank all night long. The plan was for me to take them to their interviews at the police station, check us out of the hotel room and then pick them up. That's what I did but MAN was that a H**L of a hang-over while sitting in the parking lot waiting for my buddies to come out. Then, I was driving all the way home as they sat in the back of the car drinking all the way home. I had to watch them in my mirror because they would take the cap off the bottle as I drove and put it up by my shoulder and wait for me to get a big whiff of it![xx(] Wasn't a pretty 4 hour ride home![:D]
quote:hsracer201 Posted - 03/30/2006 : 3:50:10 PM
i find it kinda amusing the longest thread on here for a while has to do with the consumption of alcohol.
quote:Originally posted by gogolen
quote:hsracer201 Posted - 03/30/2006 : 3:50:10 PM
i find it kinda amusing the longest thread on here for a while has to do with the consumption of alcohol.
quote:Originally posted by bang250
Cool we have 2 pages of stuff, we should try to keep this one goin and see if we can make the longest thread in GB archery history.
I shot a beer can with my bow at 30 yrds once. Its ok ben it was empty.[:D]
Where ya been susp. Does she have you chained up? So lets here your campin' story.[:D]
Been working 10 hours a day all week then working on my own side jobs every weekend. I barely have time to sit drink beer and watch the race every Sunday. [:D] I still make time for that though. Go rainbow tough guy Gordon! [;)] I just like his new tough guy attitude. [^]
Not much to the camping story, just a weekend away at DUI camp with a bunch of people who enjoyed drinking as much as I do. A lot of us got together for drinks after we got released on the last day. [:D] The teachers taught us about what the police were allowed to ask us to do and what we had to do by law as far as breathalizers. Plus they said that 90% of the time the breathalizer machines are not current with the calibrations that are required which equals no DUI for who blew into the uncalibrated machine! [:p] The camp seemed to help avoid being caught more than it did to teach us not to do the things. (scratching my head on that still). [:D]
I don't know if I would go along with the "calibrated machine" defense. There are two types of machines at my department. One is a small field unit that it called a PBT or personal breathalizer test. The second is back at the jail and is called a Data master. The PBT can only help with probable cause. It's not admissable in court though. The Datamaster test has to be given by a certified person and there are a bunch of steps that have to be gone through before you can be tested. (One of the main ones is that you CANNOT have ANYTHING in your mouth 20 mintues prior to the test. If you put anything {even chewing on your shirt} in your mouth, the 20 mintues starts over.[;)] It really sucks having to wait the extra time, especially if someone is ***hint, hint*** just on the borderline of the limits. Anywho, it would help your defense if you know what type of machine you are blowing into. Good luck and hope any of you never need this information.
quote:I shot a beer can with my bow at 30 yrds once. Its ok ben it was empty.
DANGIT Bang, Don't do that!!!! You almost gave Gogo and Ben heartattacks!!!![:D][:D]
quote:Slash0311 Posted - 03/31/2006 : 07:05:08 AM
I don't know if I would go along with the "calibrated machine" defense. There are two types of machines at my department. One is a small field unit that it called a PBT or personal breathalizer test. The second is back at the jail and is called a Data master. The PBT can only help with probable cause. It's not admissable in court though. The Datamaster test has to be given by a certified person and there are a bunch of steps that have to be gone through before you can be tested. (One of the main ones is that you CANNOT have ANYTHING in your mouth 20 mintues prior to the test. If you put anything {even chewing on your shirt} in your mouth, the 20 mintues starts over. It really sucks having to wait the extra time, especially if someone is ***hint, hint*** just on the borderline of the limits. Anywho, it would help your defense if you know what type of machine you are blowing into. Good luck and hope any of you never need this information.
quote:
I shot a beer can with my bow at 30 yrds once. Its ok ben it was empty.
DANGIT Bang, Don't do that!!!! You almost gave Gogo and Ben heartattacks!!!!
He can shoot all of the beer cans he wants full or not the only time I might get some heartburn about it, is if that beer can happens to be a full one of mine. People have gotten severly hurt in my area for lesser offenses.
Readin all these "Alchohol Moments" brings back a few "Memorables" for me, I'll post few...
Drove through garage door{completely},
x-wife found me tangled up and passed out in a snow-plow mount in back-yard,
fell asleep under car,
came home with no pants,
puked on many friends and relatives,
stopped harley at stop-sign and fell over,picked it up and fell over the other way,
forgot to put down my kick-stand a few times,
Enough for now, I could go on and on.....I was a total "drunk" for a lotta years....Now I try to control it instead of it controling me...
quote:Originally posted by gogolen
Bang,
I'm in Lansing right now, I go home on the weekends, easter weekend I will be going to Smyrna TN for easter shutdown.
We need to get a get-together going. It'd be fun. Bang, Taco, and Enos are all cool.
Comments
There, that should help get us back on track![:D][:p]
SO, let's talk about Ben's drinking problem and his driving...[:o)][:D]
The only problem that I have is that the weekends are too short.
oh, and the mornings are early...
and, Sunday morning sometimes comes before Saturday is over...this I'm sure.
Ben
quote:
Originally posted by Slash0311
SO, let's talk about Ben's drinking problem and his driving...
The only problem that I have is that the weekends are too short.
oh, and the mornings are early...
and, Sunday morning sometimes comes before Saturday is over...this I'm sure.
Ben
I'll second that and add one sometimes I get too toasted and miss my mouth.
quote:fishermanben Posted - 03/29/2006 : 2:32:21 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Slash0311
SO, let's talk about Ben's drinking problem and his driving...
The only problem that I have is that the weekends are too short.
oh, and the mornings are early...
and, Sunday morning sometimes comes before Saturday is over...this I'm sure.
Ben
I'll second that and add one sometimes I get too toasted and miss my mouth.
I'll second that and add sometimes when I tip my drink I fall over backwards in my chair.
quote:
Originally posted by gogolen
quote:
fishermanben Posted - 03/29/2006 : 2:32:21 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Slash0311
SO, let's talk about Ben's drinking problem and his driving...
The only problem that I have is that the weekends are too short.
oh, and the mornings are early...
and, Sunday morning sometimes comes before Saturday is over...this I'm sure.
Ben
I'll second that and add one sometimes I get too toasted and miss my mouth.
I'll second that and add sometimes when I tip my drink I fall over backwards in my chair.
Sometimes I wake up in strange places not knowing how I got there.
Well here I am talking to these two fairly hot girls, and my friend trades beers with me, without me or the girls noticing. As I'm casually talking about life, love, babies, and baby animals, I take a big friggin drink of foam. My mouth chipmunked. My face exploded. My mouth chipmunked again, and I swallowed what was left. This one girl(very hot)looks at me and says, "That didn't just happen." I was thinking, "yes darling, I'm sorry. I may have just yacked on your shoes."
I didn't have smoothness to counteract it. It sucked.
The end.
Ben
This could turn into the longest thread ever.
Speakin of smoothness or lack of, I was at a bar, was fairly intoxicated(I was not driving) and this pretty attractive lady was talkin to a guy at the table next to us, she gave him a hug so I thought hmmm, wonder if I can get one of those, I hopped up asked for a hug, got it started talkin to her, then she said "you are a very handsome man", so what did I do, I said "thanks, hope I see ya around" and left her standin there. Not sure why I guess I wasn't expecting that. She had a look on her face like what the h3ll just happened. Not funny like bens but more of a man I'm a dork thing.
quote:bang250 Posted - 03/29/2006 : 6:11:27 PM
quote:
Originally posted by gogolen
quote:
fishermanben Posted - 03/29/2006 : 2:32:21 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Slash0311
SO, let's talk about Ben's drinking problem and his driving...
The only problem that I have is that the weekends are too short.
oh, and the mornings are early...
and, Sunday morning sometimes comes before Saturday is over...this I'm sure.
Ben
I'll second that and add one sometimes I get too toasted and miss my mouth.
I'll second that and add sometimes when I tip my drink I fall over backwards in my chair.
Sometimes I wake up in strange places not knowing how I got there.
I woke up in a yard once, took me a while to figure out where I was.
sometimes I drink to much and talk to myself and laugh at what I said.
I have failed one and passed two so I guess my average is decent. The one I failed was rather costly and changed my habits A LOT. Camping with fellow failers was kinda fun though. [:D]
[:D]
I have failed one and passed two so I guess my average is decent. The one I failed was rather costly and changed my habits A LOT. Camping with fellow failers was kinda fun though. [:D]
Where ya been susp. Does she have you chained up? So lets here your campin' story.[:D]
I shot a beer can with my bow at 30 yrds once. Its ok ben it was empty.[:D]
i find it kinda amusing the longest thread on here for a while has to do with the consumption of alcohol.
Easy to talk about what you're good at[;)]
quote:hsracer201 Posted - 03/30/2006 : 3:50:10 PM
i find it kinda amusing the longest thread on here for a while has to do with the consumption of alcohol.
Easy to talk about what you're good at[;)]
Amen brother gogo[:D]
Cool we have 2 pages of stuff, we should try to keep this one goin and see if we can make the longest thread in GB archery history.
I shot a beer can with my bow at 30 yrds once. Its ok ben it was empty.[:D]
Warm beer looks better when you hit it.
quote:I shot a beer can with my bow at 30 yrds once. Its ok ben it was empty.
DANGIT Bang, Don't do that!!!! You almost gave Gogo and Ben heartattacks!!!![:D][:D]
I don't know if I would go along with the "calibrated machine" defense. There are two types of machines at my department. One is a small field unit that it called a PBT or personal breathalizer test. The second is back at the jail and is called a Data master. The PBT can only help with probable cause. It's not admissable in court though. The Datamaster test has to be given by a certified person and there are a bunch of steps that have to be gone through before you can be tested. (One of the main ones is that you CANNOT have ANYTHING in your mouth 20 mintues prior to the test. If you put anything {even chewing on your shirt} in your mouth, the 20 mintues starts over. It really sucks having to wait the extra time, especially if someone is ***hint, hint*** just on the borderline of the limits. Anywho, it would help your defense if you know what type of machine you are blowing into. Good luck and hope any of you never need this information.
quote:
I shot a beer can with my bow at 30 yrds once. Its ok ben it was empty.
DANGIT Bang, Don't do that!!!! You almost gave Gogo and Ben heartattacks!!!!
He can shoot all of the beer cans he wants full or not the only time I might get some heartburn about it, is if that beer can happens to be a full one of mine. People have gotten severly hurt in my area for lesser offenses.
Drove through garage door{completely},
x-wife found me tangled up and passed out in a snow-plow mount in back-yard,
fell asleep under car,
came home with no pants,
puked on many friends and relatives,
stopped harley at stop-sign and fell over,picked it up and fell over the other way,
forgot to put down my kick-stand a few times,
Enough for now, I could go on and on.....I was a total "drunk" for a lotta years....Now I try to control it instead of it controling me...
I'm in Lansing right now, I go home on the weekends, easter weekend I will be going to Smyrna TN for easter shutdown.
Dirtyrat,
You're a funny drunk aren't ya?
Bang,
I'm in Lansing right now, I go home on the weekends, easter weekend I will be going to Smyrna TN for easter shutdown.
We need to get a get-together going. It'd be fun. Bang, Taco, and Enos are all cool.
Ben
Dirtyrat,
You're a funny drunk aren't ya?
I'm pretty much a very quiet,reserved,kinda shy guy until you add alchohol...then I'll get any party started![;)][:D][:D][B)][:I][:0]
Say when, my schedule is pretty flexible.
Dirtyrat,
That makes two of us then.
Ben,
Say when, my schedule is pretty flexible.
cool. We need to pick out a saturday and make it happen.
Ben