Back in the hospital but this time it's me and not June
Smitty500mag
Member Posts: 13,623 ✭✭✭✭
I'm on the same floor in the same hospital where June was at when I brought her to the hospital when she had the stroke on the 15th of last month and she died on the 21st just a few days later.
I was having dizzy spells for about 3 days and pressure on my chest which I thought might have been due to the stress I've been under for the past year and a half. I went to the walk-in clinic and they said I needed to go to the emergency room because my EKG looked bad. I went to the emergency room and they admitted me on Monday and they've been running tests and they think I have blockage on the left side of my heart from the nuclear stress test they performed on me yesterday. They're going to do another test in the morning where they put the camera in your vein to look in your heart.
I prayed to the Lord all the while that June was sick to keep me healthy so I could take care of her. Looks like God took me up on the deal. Less than a month later here I am.
I'll find out in the morning whether I need to have stents put in or open heart surgery I guess.
I guess this is in keeping with my theory that I was already dead and living in hell as terrible things continue to happen. I suppose I could jump off a bridge to test out my theory but then as my luck goes it wouldn't be good I'm sure.
Well guys when you have the time say one for me.
I'll keep you all updated and if you don't hear back from me, well things just didn't turn out very good.
I've enjoyed it here Y'all so take care now. I'll be back if I can.
Greg
Comments
You have my prayers
Hang in there, Greg. We've lost too many good folks already.
Talking to Him now…putting in a good word for you.
I will put you on my list
One of the worst things about being here in the hospital is the fact that June's ashes are sitting on an end table in our living room in an urn and I'm here in the hospital not able to have a memorial for her.
Our kids and the rest of the family we're making plans for a get together soon and since everyone lives out of state so now that's on hold until I get out of here and if I don't get out they can have a double memorial sometime and put us in the same vault together. I've already told everyone to make sure that we are put in the same vault together and buried next to the rest of our family in the cemetery that my great grandfather bought at the end of the 1800s. There's still 6 gravesites left in that old plot. Great great grandpa is there along with my great grandpa and my grandpa and my dad along with my great great grandma, great grandma and grandma.
All the other times over the years June was always by my side in the hospital when I needed surgery or whatever to watch over me now it's just me alone here. My mom is 90 years old and while in good mental condition she's not getting around very well these days and my sister takes care of her so they can't come to help me out either.
Our oldest son is still taking care of his wife who has stage 4 brain cancer and trying to keep our grandkids in school while trying to run his business. Wish I could be there for him.
Our youngest son lives in Seattle so he can't just come running every time one of us gets sick. He's already spent a lot of money on plane tickets this past year to visit his mom. He and his wife were just here 3 weeks ago.
Sorry to ramble on guys but I got nothing else to do until the morning when they run the test. Who knows maybe I'll get lucky this time? Yeah right! That almost makes me laugh to say it.
Greg, my father has been through this seventeen times, and still here. They are very good at what they do.
Prayers for the least invasive procedure, and speedy recovery.
You've definitely earned our prayers, just don't give up, hang in there 👍️
"Never do wrong to make a friend----or to keep one".....Robert E. Lee
+1...
Combat Vet VN
D.A.V Life Member
Sending prayers.
If stents are the answer, you'll feel better pretty quick.
You're still young enough to have open heart surgery and come back from it.
Now is the time to rest and get yourself well. Everything else can wait.
Prayers from SW Virginia.
Prayers sent
Prayers said!
If you can't feel the music; it's only pink noise!
prayers
Prayers from MO.....
I've been where you are. I wound up with 5 bypasses back in 2015. I'm still chuggin along.
My father died and his wife had him cremated, I went to see her later and she asked me to have the funeral home cremate her and put both of their ashes in the same urn, so that's what I did. She also wanted their dog's ashes that they loved so much to be included in the urn.
Funeral homes will accommodate most any reasonable request.
Joe
Smitty, your family needs you. Our best prayers and wishes for your recovery physically and emotionally. In time good memories will rise to the top. Hang in, time is your friend. More time with your family is the reward.
Ramble on anytime you get the urge. I think it is well worth the read. Prayers. Don
Still on my prayer list
It seems like the Lord has answered your prayers in the past so no reason to think He wont answer your prayers now!!
Prayers sent.
Thanks for the prayers and well wishes. You all have been a big help over the past year and a half when I had time to visit the site.
For some of those that may have not seen my earlier posts about June, she battled stage 4 lung and spine cancer for over a year and a half as I sit by her bedside. I really can't describe the pain that she went through.
I used to think that I was a pretty tough guy and went all through grammar school and high school and never cried a day because it wasn't the thing that boys did but I got to say I made up for it this past year and a half.
I had my arms around June as she took her last breath. The most heart-wrenching thing I ever went through. I don't think I can ever get over this. When I'm able to sleep I still wake up two or three times a night thinking I hear June crying and needing her pain medicine. Then I realize it was only another bad dream. I still reach over to see if she really is not there.
I look back now at the half century that we spent together and remember all the great times that we had which makes me wonder why we ever had an argument over any thing. That was time wasted that I would give anything to have back.
Maybe my rambling on will help someone else realize how much they love their wife or husband and maybe won't make any stupid mistakes by arguing over the little things that mean nothing.
Maybe that's the reason some people never get married or fall in love because they know it'll end someday and don't want to go through this.
Sorry guys I'm getting sappy now. I need to try to get some sleep. The nurse just brought me a sleeping pill so maybe I can go to sleep and forget all this for just a little while.
Smitty, my wife had two stents put in and a ablation. Right now she is fighting for her life.( different problem) Dr. Craig Smith same guy who did Bill Clinton and Barbara Walters cracked my chest and I survived. Just ask the Doc if he ever did this before and if not run like hell. Seriously Smitty you are going to be fine. Yes, the love that you showed June had a big impact on my life and made me realize how much I love my sweetheart Diane. Prayers for you and your family ---Ray
YOu go it
I am thinking of you constantly and I cannot wait to check in and hear that you are on the road to recovery and feeling much better.
hoping the best for you . I am sure they will get you back in action
I had my chest opened up 16 years ago ( I was 48 ) had a heart Cath done a couple months back Doc said it looked like he done it yesterday all good
Greg, you are in my prayers. Over a year of being Ms. June's caretaker may have narrowed your thoughts to that being your only reason for being. Remember you are also a friend, a father, a grandfather. You still have many miles to go as many things to many people.
what susie said so well
I am so sorry to hear about June, She was a strong woman and cared about you as much as you cared for her.
No honestly, I must have gotten some dust in my eyes. Ya that's it, dust in my eyes.
June had something the doctors still do not have a handle on.
From the sounds of it, you have something that the doctors DO have a good handle on. Hang in there.
My wife and I have had talks about you and June, even when I am NOT on the forum, which is a rarity .
Sending best wishes your way, so you can continue to ramble and be as sappy as possible.
My prayers are going out for you this morning Greg. Hang tough my friend. God's got this!
Prayers asked for you Greg
You hang in there Smitty the world needs men like you as does your family, prayers for a complete recovery and you can ramble anytime you want, and as said above there is a lot of dust in the air...
God Bless Smitty and his family.
Hey man. Praying from here. I want you to stick around!
And fiery auto crashes
Some will die in hot pursuit
While sifting through my ashes
Some will fall in love with life
And drink it from a fountain
That is pouring like an avalanche
Coming down the mountain
keep us updated we all do care
I'm sorry to hear this news. Seems a guy should get a break between crisis. Miss June would want you to buck-up and beat this thing. At this house, we'll be praying she gets her wish!
Okay here's some more rambling from me.
Here's the latest on my health problem. They went in through an artery in my right arm yesterday morning with the intentions of putting in a stent in my heart artery if needed but decided they couldn't do it at the Piedmont hospital in Fayetteville GA. The artery they call the widow maker was 100% plugged up and the heart had rerouted blood by a different direction into the left side of my heart. Anyway that's the way they explained it to me it may not be exactly right since they had given me a pretty good sedative.
They called me earlier today and gave me instructions on what to do for my appointment for the up coming procedure in Atlanta.
Right now I'm so tired I can hardly drag around. If I live through this I got a lot of work to be done on other parts of my body that really went downhill in the past year and a half caring for June through her illness.
I've got two teeth that have broken off that I didn't get fixed because I didn't want to leave June alone that long. The bone spurs on my heels have gotten worse and I can't hardly walk without some thick inner soles in my shoes. Fixing any of this now would be like replacing wheel bearing on a car with a blown engine. I'll wait and see if I live though the next procedure which they call installing a "Chronic Total Occlusion Stent"?? If that works then I'll start doing other maintenance work on the rest of my body.
The only good thing about all this is my youngest son and I that have been on the outs the last year or so have set aside our stupid differences at June's request on her dying bed. We really can't remember what our riff started over in the first place. We talked for a long time on the phone tonight and he wants me to come to Seattle to live with him and his wife when I get back on my feet. That was the best present I could have ever hoped for that he would want ME to come and live with him. I wouldn't put that burden on him and his wife though. While I can take care of myself now but in less than 18 years I'll be 90 years old if I live that long and it's a rear task to care for someone when they're completely disabled. It was all I could do to care for June during her illness. It was the hardest thing I've ever done.
Many nights I never slept a wink while June moaned and cried from the pain. I can't put in words the pain she went through. That damn disease when it goes to the bones is like nothing anyone can imagine. There is no relief. Besides having it in the lungs it had eaten up 2 vertebras in her neck that they replaced with a cage with 2 steel rods and screws, it was in her thighs and pelvis also. I was giving her 8 mg of Dilaudid every 2 hours and 60 mg of Morphine every 4 hours for the pain and it seemed to have no more effect than aspirin. She begged me to give her gun to her on several occasions when the pain was at it's worse.
They told me I need to have someone to bring me home when I leave the hospital after the procedure that I couldn't drive myself and I told them I'm here in Georgia alone and would have drive myself or get a ride from Uber. The woman said she didn't think they would allow me to get a ride with Uber. I ask her what's the difference who took me home? Whether it's a friend or a Uber driver? The lady I was talking to said she would check and see and get back with me.
Like I said in my earlier post my oldest son in Knoxville has his hands full caring for his wife who has stage 4 brain cancer and can't be here with me and my youngest son lives 3,000 miles away and he's already spent a fortune on plane tickets visiting June the past year so he can't be here either. My Mom is 90 and while she's sharp as a tack mentally she just can't come down here it's to far and I wouldn't want her to even try and my sister is taking care of my Mom so she can't be here either. I really don't see what the problem is how I get home from the hospital.
Well that's about it for tonight. I've rambled on enough.
One other thing...4205raymond I'm sorry to hear that your wife is battling for her life at this time. I sincerely hope it's not cancer she's battling. I'll say a prayer for her but my prayers seem to have no effect these days.
Your prayers may have more effect than you think Smitty. Those of your friends here too. June suffers no more as she walks with The Savior, and you're still kickin'.
I just don't know what to say other then I'm sorry that you're going through all this and I'll keep praying for you.
Smitty, my wife Diane would be honored to receive your prayers. She was supposed to be discharged after six days with the third bout of Pneumonia but she was too weak to even stand or get in wheel chair with two people helping. After waiting three days they finally got her into rehab in same hospital. They removed a three inch tumor with a laser that was protruding into her windpipe in upper left lobe. They went down her windpipe with the laser at Westchester Medical Center about a year ago and got what they could. Radiation or Chemo are no goes because of many factors. Last cat scan a few days ago showed no fresh growth at tumor site. I have been her caregiver since she had a stroke and fell really hard on her knees over four years ago. Her mind is 100% but her body has been thru hell with so many set backs since the stroke. Presently a lot has fallen on my daughter who has to drive over two hours from further upstate. My hearing is terrible on the phone.
I have not been able to see her for 11 days because I never had the two vaccine shots. I took her a bunch of clean clothes today and almost lost it at the front entrance over their no vaccine no entrance policy. I know it is my fault that I can't visit her and the guilt is overwhelming. I never interfeared with the rest of my family getting the vaccine but I feel I have a right to choose. We are loosing so many of our Freedoms.------------------------Ray