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My Dad used to yell at me all the time, "HEY! YOU BETTER QUIT DOING THAT OR IT'LL MAKE YOU GO BLIND!" But I always had to yell back, "DAD! I'M OVER HERE!"
and a rebuttal
She just didn't get hit with the stick, she got the whole tree.
and my grandfathers favorite and his answer whenever I asked him how my first boat ran.
Faster than a scald hog.
rldowns3, I literally laughed out loud on that one. Best one I've heard in a long time.
"If ever time should come, when vain and aspiring men shall possess the highest seats in Government, our country will stand in need of its experienced Patriots to prevent its ruin." Samuel Adams
Ugly enough to run a haint up a thorn bush. (If'n you don't know what a haint is, you ain't country at all.)
If I had a dog as ugly as you, I'd shave his butt and make him walk backward.
SIG pistol armorer/FFL Dealer/Full time Peace Officer, Moderator of General Discussion Board on Gunbroker. Visit www.gunbroker.com the best gun auction site on the Net! Email gpd035@sbcglobal.net
"Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it that the former does not submit to hereditary predjudices, but honestly and courageously uses his intelligence." - Albert E.
On my tombstone:"Keep you eyes on the road, your hands upon the wheel..."the Lizard King
"He's about as sharp as a sack of wet sand" (I'm the only one to use it, though)
"He called me everything but a child of God"
"He took off like a strip-ed * ape" (I dunno why they split the word that way, but they do)
"Looks like 2 hogs wrestlin in a gunny sack"
"Queer as a cat fart"
"Face to make a freight train take a mud road"
O Lord,
grant me the Serenity
to accept the things
I cannot change
the courage to change the things I can,
and the supreme firepower to make the difference.
Comments
Convince a fool against his will,and they'll
be of the same opinion still.
Not worth a tinkers dam.
Just a flash in the pan.
So hungry I can see cornbread walking on crutchs.
Meanest man that ever mudded a barpit.
Economical as a coat-hanger abortion.
She got hit with the ugly stick.
and a rebuttal
She just didn't get hit with the stick, she got the whole tree.
and my grandfathers favorite and his answer whenever I asked him how my first boat ran.
Faster than a scald hog.
rldowns3, I literally laughed out loud on that one. Best one I've heard in a long time.
"If ever time should come, when vain and aspiring men shall possess the highest seats in Government, our country will stand in need of its experienced Patriots to prevent its ruin." Samuel Adams
why chase the game when the bullet can get em from here?....
Got Balistics?
Busyier that a cat covering Sh it
You can't be given orders until you learn to take them
queer as a green cat
"America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves."
~Abraham Lincoln
Raining like a cow pizzing on a flat rock.
Raining cats and dogs.
Raining pitchforks.
Hotter than a two dollar pistol.
Ugly enough to run a haint up a thorn bush. (If'n you don't know what a haint is, you ain't country at all.)
If I had a dog as ugly as you, I'd shave his butt and make him walk backward.
SIG pistol armorer/FFL Dealer/Full time Peace Officer, Moderator of General Discussion Board on Gunbroker. Visit www.gunbroker.com the best gun auction site on the Net! Email gpd035@sbcglobal.net
rldowns3, yer'a blowen smoke up our *, you answered your dad same as the rest of us, " I'll quit soon as I need Glasses "
& my favorite " slicker'n slobber "
"all I really need to know I learned in kindergarten" Robert Fulghum
anyone who says "nobody needs a full auto" has never been in front of a brown bear charge
Handy as a pocket on a shirt.
Grandma's slow, but she's 87.
Semper Fi
Remember Ruby Ridge.
What if there were no hypothetical questions?
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"...hotter than the hubs of Hades"
"...as nervous as a virgin on prom night."
"... the greatest thing since sliced bread."
"Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it that the former does not submit to hereditary predjudices, but honestly and courageously uses his intelligence." - Albert E.
On my tombstone:"Keep you eyes on the road, your hands upon the wheel..."the Lizard King
If brains were gunpowder, he couldn't blow his nose
Uglier than a mud fence
crazier than a bedbug
Just as happy as if he had good sense
She's like Will Rogers. She never met a man she didn't like, either.
Just call me "Griffin"
Proud member of the NRA
When I do good, I feel good; when I do bad, I feel bad, and that is my religion.
Abraham Lincoln
If I had only known, I would have been a locksmith.
Albert Einstein
I am not a number I am a free man
"Get ready for a new administration in Washington. People are tired of being misled (pun intended!)"
Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he is not,
and a sense of humor was provided to console him for what he is.
"He called me everything but a child of God"
"He took off like a strip-ed * ape" (I dunno why they split the word that way, but they do)
"Looks like 2 hogs wrestlin in a gunny sack"
"Queer as a cat fart"
"Face to make a freight train take a mud road"
O Lord,
grant me the Serenity
to accept the things
I cannot change
the courage to change the things I can,
and the supreme firepower to make the difference.