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??? to kill the other testicle...

SpartacusSpartacus Member Posts: 14,415
edited October 2011 in General Discussion
as you know, i accidentally shot off one of my testicles recently.
no big deal, the remaining one would suffice for hormone production. (trust me, i'm a doctor)
well, earlier today i was helping a buddy break a 2 yr old horse.
as soon as i got on the basturd bucked and tried to jump over the 6 ft high corral panels
my crotch slammed against the horn on the saddle and the second jump pinned me against the panels.
didn't think much of it until now.
scrotum is size of a softball and very painful.
got an ice pack on now, but still miserable.
i'm thinking of just removing the damage "stuff". i have pharmacy grade testosterone to supplement, if needed.
what say you? would i be any less of a man if i had no testicles?
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    redneckandyredneckandy Member Posts: 9,686 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    If you didn't realize it until your scrotum was softball size, I doubt you will miss what's down there.[}:)]
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    SpartacusSpartacus Member Posts: 14,415
    edited November -1
    well, it was a slow process. took almost 8 hours to get to this point.
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    remingtonoaksremingtonoaks Member Posts: 26,251 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    A mans grit is measured by what is in his heart, not his pants. And if you do choose to become a unich, I as a good friend will help out with your dutys by servicing your wife[}:)]
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    MudderChuckMudderChuck Member Posts: 4,105
    edited November -1
    Was this you in the newspaper today? Before you do anything drastic, call the Guinness Book of world records.








    testicel.jpg
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    Waco WaltzWaco Waltz Member Posts: 10,828 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    R U pulling our collective leg?
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    MFIMFI Member Posts: 7,899 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    I am about to enter my tenth year of remission from bilateral testicular cancer. Lost both of them basically 10 years ago. The testerone I have to take everyday is a pain in the * and it doesnt always absorb the same into the body. They really havent perfected anything that works well yet in that field. I am not less of a man in fact I am more of a man now than I ever was before.
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    rongrong Member Posts: 8,459
    edited November -1
    Course not!
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    JamesRKJamesRK Member Posts: 25,670 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    You're a doctor and asking this crowd for medical advice? I'll bet Joe the bartender is your financial advisor. [:D]

    If you really did whack the boys boy, you have my sympathy.
    The road to hell is paved with COMPROMISE.
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    spasmcreekspasmcreek Member Posts: 37,724 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    where is goat gland Brinkley when you need him ???
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    nunnnunn Forums Admins, Member, Moderator Posts: 36,013 ******
    edited November -1
    In ancient times, when monarchs and the wealthy had harems, they sometimes employed eunuchs to guard the harem, figuring that the absence of certain equipment made them safe. Not so. Eunuchs very often took care of business when the boss wasn't around.

    We have a rat terrier male who is neutered, and a small mix-breed female who has not been spayed. When the * comes into heat, the little rat terrier takes care of business as though he still had all his issued gear.
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    Alan RushingAlan Rushing Member Posts: 9,002 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    No problem, go for it!

    That is what I did with my truck.

    It was using a lot of fuel and the engine was knocking badly.

    Pulled that transmission, no more knocking, fuel consumption dropped to near nothing and it is generally simple matter to keep the fuel tank full most all of the time now.

    Either someone siphons a gallon of fuel now and again or there is some loss with evaporation.

    Have had no problems with that vehicle lately and saving money all the way around. My vehicle insurance rates have for the first time ever been reduced! Them folks figured with that truck not going anywhere fast, the chances of much damage is reduced some. [;)]

    I'm in much better health now too with walking so much, I'm in better shape, at least my legs and lungs are better now! [^] [xx(] [^]
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    bambambambambambam Member Posts: 4,814 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    There was a kid in H.S. that slept on his junk the wrong way somehow. He woke up in pain. They took him to the doctor and they had to remove one of the boys. They called him UNO for a while.[:D]
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    thebambam2001thebambam2001 Member Posts: 733 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    Let's have some pics!!!!!!!!!!!
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    footlongfootlong Member Posts: 8,009
    edited November -1
    Sparcy- You need to keep at least one BUD to light the MATCH [;)]
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    n/an/a Member Posts: 168,427 ✭
    edited November -1
    If you have had that much trouble with them, you are better off without em....[:o)][:o)][:o)]
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    bpostbpost Member Posts: 32,664 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Wow, this needs to be places on Dr.Oz's TV show, with pictures and audio for the ladies afternoon viewing pleasure.
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    givettegivette Member Posts: 10,886 ✭
    edited November -1
    I, for one, feel honored that a Physician would seek [medical] consul from these very boards. Quite honored, indeed!

    Note to self: Stay away from Dr. Spartacus
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    DancesWithSheepDancesWithSheep Member Posts: 12,938 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    I don't believe you ever had any.
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    gbeggrowgbeggrow Member Posts: 5,499
    edited November -1
    [:0][:D][:D][:D]

    quote:Originally posted by DancesWithSheep
    I don't believe you ever had any.
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    footlongfootlong Member Posts: 8,009
    edited November -1
    Sparcy--Got any Chinese in you[?][?]

    lf so, you now be known as

    Wan Hong Lo [:0]
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    gesshotsgesshots Member Posts: 15,679 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Here's Chaz's facebook page - ask him!! [;)][:D][:D]

    http://www.facebook.com/pages/Chaz-Bono/107938592560473
    It's being willing. I found out early that most men, regardless of cause or need, aren't willing. They blink an eye or draw a breath before they pull the trigger. I won't. ~ J.B. Books
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    MudderChuckMudderChuck Member Posts: 4,105
    edited November -1
    quote:

    We have a rat terrier male who is neutered, and a small mix-breed female who has not been spayed. When the * comes into heat, the little rat terrier takes care of business as though he still had all his issued gear.


    I had a Tom Cat who was the same way, he was neutered and still serviced all the females in the neighborhood. My best guess is nobody ever told him some of his junk was missing.
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    nmyersnmyers Member Posts: 16,880 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    You need an expert opinion.

    My urologist is director of reconstructive urology at a major medical center. Email me if you want contact information.

    Neal

    "Measure twice, cut once."
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    swampgutswampgut Member Posts: 5,555
    edited November -1
    Hold on a minute, you shot off a testicle?

    How did I miss that story?
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    GuvamintCheeseGuvamintCheese Member Posts: 38,932
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by swampgut
    Hold on a minute, you shot off a testicle?

    How did I miss that story?
    Thats what I was thinking. .
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    retroxler58retroxler58 Member Posts: 32,693 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by cartod
    quote:Originally posted by swampgut
    Hold on a minute, you shot off a testicle?

    How did I miss that story?
    Thats what I was thinking. .
    Same goes for me here...
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    guntech59guntech59 Member Posts: 23,187 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Y'all are WAYYYYYYY too interested in his balls....just sayin'.[:0]
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    reload999reload999 Member Posts: 3,080 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by thebambam2001
    Let's have some pics!!!!!!!!!!!
    Let's not [xx(]
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    dcon12dcon12 Member Posts: 31,950 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by buschmaster
    you're giving up too easy!



    Yea, he needs to grow a pair! Don
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    retroxler58retroxler58 Member Posts: 32,693 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by guntech59
    Y'all are WAYYYYYYY too interested in his balls....just sayin'.[:0]
    Didn't say anything 'bout bein' interested.... [;)]

    Just un-informed...
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    nunnnunn Forums Admins, Member, Moderator Posts: 36,013 ******
    edited November -1
    There's a feller in our jail who only has one, due to one being shot off by one of our officers. Even though one will do the work of two, it will be some time before he gets to put it to its intended purpose, I reckon.
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    SpartacusSpartacus Member Posts: 14,415
    edited November -1
    well, everything looks different this morning. thanks all for your advice.


    tom
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    cahascahas Member Posts: 4,064
    edited November -1
    Less of a Man? I am afraid that I have lost the liberty to comment on that today, I put on a woman's coat, but putting it in perspective- Say you have 1 leg and you bust up the other, I would do everything in modern medical genius to save the other if I had a chance to use it again.
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    bigoutsidebigoutside Member Posts: 19,443 ✭
    edited November -1
    I suspect the real story has something to do with your wife loosing her purse while she was keeping your nuts safe for you.[;)]
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    remingtonoaksremingtonoaks Member Posts: 26,251 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by nunn
    There's a feller in our jail who only has one, due to one being shot off by one of our officers. Even though one will do the work of two, it will be some time before he gets to put it to its intended purpose, I reckon.


    You're asumming that inmates don't tag each other [:0]
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    gbeggrowgbeggrow Member Posts: 5,499
    edited November -1
    Silly story on this topic...few years back I had to have surgery on my "equipment" and the urologist told me that if there was a problem once they got in there that they might have to remove one but could put in a prosthetic one. I said (with a straight face) fair enough but I'd like you to add two while your at it for a total of three so I can go on tour with the circus. There was a moment of awkward silence until I gave the little Asian man a "just kidding". [;)][:D]
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    bpostbpost Member Posts: 32,664 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Is your nickname perchance "Lucky"????
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    OakieOakie Member Posts: 40,519 ✭✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    Your making my testicals hurt just reading your story[xx(]
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    JasonVJasonV Member Posts: 2,480 ✭✭✭
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by buschmaster
    you're giving up too easy! "oh, I whacked my ball and it swelled up, maybe I should... chop it off!" what's wrong with you dude? it's your testicle!




    That is what I was thinking. Rub some dirt on them it and walk it off soldier!
    formerly known as warpig883
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    edgecamedgecam Member Posts: 3,280
    edited November -1
    quote:Originally posted by retroxler58
    quote:Originally posted by cartod
    quote:Originally posted by swampgut
    Hold on a minute, you shot off a testicle?

    How did I miss that story?
    Thats what I was thinking. .
    Same goes for me here...



    http://forums.gunbroker.com/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=534676

    Here ya go
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